Runaway

Runaway

It is 11:45pm and i lay down still and quiet in my bed, waiting for all my family to fall asleep. A couple of hours later i hear the snoring from every room in the house. I started to sweat, i was scared but i really had to leave.
I slowly got up of the creaking bed, afraid of whom i was going to wake. I sneaked carefully across my bedroom floor towards the window, and spread the curtains open, enough to see the starry, night sky.
I looked around the room making sure i packed everything i needed in my suitcase, i walked over to my bedroom door and peeped my head round the corner, looking directly into my mothers room. My father was sleeping at his flat that he had not far from my mothers house.
I grabbed my suitcase and creeped across the landing floor as carefully as i could, the landing kept making squeaky, creaking noises, but none of my family woke up. I sat on the stairs and pulled my suitcase onto my lap and slid down the stairs as fast but as carefully as i could.
When i successfully got downstairs i was feeling really guilty about what i was doing. I kept thinking to myself how would my family react, would they beat me, would they just leave me to do what i wanted, would they ever talk to me again. Thoughts ran through my head like an out of control rollercoaster.
I walked through the living room and picked up my coat and trainers on my way to the kitchen. I was feeling more and more guilty as time passed, but me and my selfish ways wasn't really caring about anyone or anything at this very moment in time. After i had put my coat and trainers on, i took the goodbye letter out of my trouser pocket that i had written that very same day. I laid the letter on top of my mothers laptop and i scanned the room one last time, thinking of all the happy memories i had living in that house.
I turned the back door key as carefully and as quietly as i could and stepped outside into the cold, winter air. At this moment i was very scared but i continued. I closed back the door and lifted my suitcase over the front gate and squeezed myself through a gap between the gate and the bush. I walked as fast as i could, down my street and away from the house so i was out of view. I sat on my suitcase as my legs were shaking a little with fright, it was dark still, anything could of happened to me, i was really frightened, i didn't want to do what i was doing but there was no going back, well that's at least what i thought, and i was wrong.
I sat on my suitcase looking back at my house, my house that i was going to leave for good. I called for a cab which picked me up from where i was sat. I took one last glimpse at my house as the car started driving round the street corner into hell. Well hell was what i called it back then. Tears formed in my eyes, then started rolling down my cheeks, how could i be doing this, this isn't me at all, what was going through my mind, i thought to myself every now and then.
The taxi pulled up outside my best friends house, she came outside and helped me with my bags, i put on a brave smile when we got inside but she could see that i was lost and confused and that i didn't know what i was doing. My best friend held me tightly in her arms and asked me if this is what i wanted to do, i kept on telling her yes, but she could see through me, a part of me wanted to go home.
The night went on, but i couldn't sleep at all, i was scared of what people was going to do and say.
Tomorrow came and today i was really feeling the heat. Suddenly my phone rang, i stared at the name that had come up on the screen, it was my mother. I put my phone down on the floor and covered my ears, it stopped ringing. My phone rang and rang throughout the whole day but i never answered. I was too ashamed about what i had done, i wasn't going to do it again, even if i don't ever go back home.
Today i still wish i hadn't done what i did, i am still ashamed, i regret every single bit of what i did, what i put my family and friends through, even what i had put myself through.
So to those who are still at home and wanting to runaway, please don't for my sake, for your family and friends sake, for your own sake. Please don't put yourself through what i had done. I didn't realise how much my family meant to me that day, all because of my selfish ways. No matter what circumstance you are in, your family is the most sacred ones of them all.

By Anina Sutherland