The Admin Issue 1

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Issue 1

Frank Delgado’s supervisor was going to kill him. He was sure of it. This was the second time he was late. The bus sped down the city street lined with suits scrambling around the office park like ants. His cell phone sang like the Beastie Boys, and he fumbled around in his pocket. He heard a faint crack, like maybe the bus hit something. He looked up, seeing nothing as he rounded the corner.

The body lay on the sidewalk slowly bleeding its life away

The office admin opened his eyes slowly to see a middle aged man in a crisp suit. His shiny hair was slicked back. There did not seem to be a thread out of place. Behind him a vast low walled maze of cubes filled out a massive office space. “Welcome to hell Admin 1005,” the man said.

“Where is the fire and brimstone?” the Admin said. The man leaned back in his chair and squeezed a blue stress ball thoughtfully. “In hell we believe more in personal growth. I don’t want you to think of me as your devil, but more as someone who is here to help you succeed. A happy worker is a good worker after all,” the man said smiling widely.

The man led the admin out into the maze of cubes filled with other admins talking through black headsets and clattering softly on bone white keyboards.

He sat the admin down in a vacant cube. “Just sit here and work your magic,” the man said as he walked away.

A familiar beep sounded in the Admin’s ear as a call came in. “Hello and thank you for calling Lucifer, how may I provide you excellent service,” he heard himself say in a drone like voice. He looked around at the company slogan, the mission statement, and an inspirational poster that hung in his cube and felt an almost unbearable sadness, just enough to slowly torture him.

“Hey you want out,” a voice said under his cube. He looked to see a hand reaching through his wastepaper bin. He felt a tug on his foot, and soon he was being dragged through a junkyard.

He looked up to see a long haired hippy. “The name is Jesus dude,” Jesus said. “Oh hello Jesus dude,” the admin said. “You are working for me now, or you could go back to the office” Jesus said smiling. “Please don’t send me back. What do you want me to do?” The admin said wearily.


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