Rainbows

Rainbows: that’s what my life is like. A mixture of bright and pastel colors combined to make one strip of happy…NOT! My life is a mixture of pink, orange, purple, brown, blue, black, white, green, and grey. I am a mixture of all the colors, not just the normal ones, but I am not that brownish blob you get when you mix all the paint canisters together. My whole group is that way. We each have our own colors. I am pink: bouncy and bubbly like gum and always in a cheery mood. Nikki is blue: calm and full of wisdom, also a nice coolness that seems to surround her. Marisa is purple: a little bit of everything, she can be one way or another and she always seems to shine. Then there’s Rogen, defiantly grey: solid and sturdy, can be hard to understand the exact feelings he has but you love him none the less.

This is my group of friends. Up until the beginning of high school, we had never really spoken. Then we all had the same class and sat at the same table. That was the start of our everlasting friendship. It was all peachy keen and cool beans for us. We were the happiest kids in school as long as we had each other……

“MOVING!?!” we all screamed as Nikki announced her ominous news.

“Yeah, we’re leaving in a couple weeks. I begged and cried but they wouldn’t change their minds” Nikki sobbed out. We were at the park to enjoy a warm summer day.

The month of June had just begun and no school for the next three months. And this summer was suppose to be the best one ever. We were all going into our senior year; we all had gotten our licenses, and longer curfews.

“This cant be happening” Marisa kept repeating, not wanting to believe what Nikki was saying. “It can’t be true! It can’t”, she screamed while shaking Rogen

“I’m sorry but it is true” Nikki said hugging Marisa. Marisa in turn blushed hard. Just about everyone knew that Marisa had a crush on Nikki…every one except Nikki that is.

Even though your little group looked all well adjusted, there was one teeny tiny problem….crushes. There was a huge love triangle…er square. Marisa had a crush on Nikki, Nikki had a crush on Rogen, Rogen had a crush on me, and to be honest I had a crush on Rogen as well, but I stayed away from him cause of Nikki.

“How can we get separated? This is just….it just sucks!” Rogen said sadly.

Nikki, through teary eyes, hugged Rogen. “I know! I don’t want to leave you guys”. At this Marisa got a little flustered and hugged Nikki again.

“I won’t let you leave” Marisa shouted, not letting go

“Guys…we need to accept this. Nikki is leaving in a few weeks. Let’s try to enjoy what time we have left with her” I said trying to get everyone to calm down. They all started at me and pulled me into their group hug.

“Izzy’s right, we need to savor each hour we have left!” Marisa said wiping away her tears and pulling away from the hug. Nikki and I soon followed. For the next five minuets we all just sat in a little silent circle, none of us wanting to make the others any sadder that what we already were.

“Wanna get some sodas?” Rogen finally suggested.

“…yeah, all that crying made me thirsty” Marisa said getting up. The rest of us followed her example, brushing the dirt and grass off the seats of our pants.

“Which place should we go?” I asked, just wanting the tension to break.

“Let’s let Nikki decide. Where would you like to go Nik?” Rogen asked in a gentlemanly tone.

“Ummm, how about Seth’s” Nikki suggested, it being her favorite shop in town…cause Rogen’s family owned it. [And if you haven’t noticed, I’m a HUGE Seth Rogen fan!!!]

“Then off we go!” Marisa said linking arms with Nikki and running off to Seth’s Soda Parlor, leaving me and Rogen behind.

“Nikki’s leaving Izzy, that means-” Rogen started, but was cut off.

“That means nothing, it isn’t fair to Nikki. She likes you and she’ll always like you. I can’t do that to her…no matter how much I like you” I said with my head down a bit, not wanting to see Rogen’s face.

“She’ll be far away Izzy; we don’t have to tell her. Please, just consider it at least” he pleaded, desperately wanting a chance with me.

“…fine. I’ll consider it” I said slowly walking towards Seth’s. As I started to walk away, I felt big, warm arms encircle around me. “Rogen…” I sighed out, knowing it was wrong of me to be enjoying the closeness. We remained that way till my guilt got the better of me. “W…we have to go” I slightly stuttered.

“…I guess” Rogen replied, his face clearly disappointed. I walked a little ahead of him all the way to the soda parlor.

“Where have you guys been!?!” Marisa asked, already done with two drinks.

“Well you guys ran so fast and I’ve been tired all day so I took it slow” I said sitting next to Marisa and Rogen sat next to Nikki, who looked like she was about to let out a fan girl squeal.

“What do you losers want?” asked a familiar voice.

“Pepsi with cherries in it” I said smiling at my favorite waitress, Bailey.

“Why don’t you just get a cherry Pepsi?” she asked only slightly annoyed.

“Cause its better with real cherries” I said beaming a smile.

“And for you, twerp?” she asked Rogen.

“Pepsi with real lemon, big sis” he chuckled out.

“Alright, little brother” she replied with a false love tone and walked away to fetch our drinks.

“Ah how I love annoying your sister Rogen” I laughed.

“Well it’s very easy” he replied. On that note we all started laughing at Bailey’s expense. After hours of talking of good times past and the occasional Bailey bashing, we left the parlor. We walked around town, remembering all the wacky adventures we had over the past three years. It was a sad realization that we would be minus one in only two short weeks. I was surprised we were able to laugh.

“I have to get home and help pack” Nikki uttered after receiving a call from her mom.

“Okay, but we still have tomorrow and the next day and the next day and the next day and the next day and-” Marisa started.

“And nine days after that” I interjected.

“Yeah…” Nikki sighed out, it being obvious that she didn’t want to leave just as much as we wanted her to stay. We parted ways at the cross roads, Nikki going down one street, Rogen back to Seth’s, and me and Marisa down our street.

“I can’t believe it, Izzy. I just can’t” Marisa said almost in tears.

“I know hon. I can’t believe it either. I know how you feel about her so it must be the hardest for you” I said in a calming voice.

“Pfff, like she cares. She’d rather have Rogen pinning after her” she said with a bit of hurt in her voice.

I couldn’t find any words that would be able to console her, because we both knew that that was the truth. I just held Marisa and she held me back. I remember her saying once that I was the only person she could really crying in front of. Not the kind of crying she showed at Nikki’s news, but genuinely hurt crying. And in a way I was happy that I was of use, that she trusted me the most to show the weak little girl inside of her. So that’s why I didn’t need to say anything, I just needed to be there for her. We stayed together for several minuets before she let go.

“I’m fine now Izzy, honest” she said wiping the tears away.

“Okay Marisa” was all I said as I walked her to her house, and then walked to mine.

The following week was filled with fun and excitement as we did everything we could with Nikki. We practically did a whole summers worth of events in one week. Everything from going to the beach, to the amusement park, and then shopping. We even talked Rogen into wearing a dress. Personally, that was the highlight of my day. With five days till Nikki had to leave us, we took a special trip to the old-style ice cream parlor in the town next to ours. It was Nikki’s favorite spot for ice cream and it held special meaning to our group.

“Cheers mateys” I said holding up my chocolate malt and the others clinked their frozen treats against mine.

“I love this place, ever since the ice cream fight  two years ago” Marisa stated noting the large chocolate stain on  the wall that was impossible to remove.

“I loved the way it started. That girl purposely knocked Izzy’s malt over, thus making Rogen and Marisa bombard the girl with their ice creams, then I hid under the table till all you dragged me out and made me participate in the great ice cream battle” Nikki recalled, mostly telling the story to herself then us.

“I can’t believe they still let us in here” Rogen laughed

“Its cause we’re their best costumers….and your dad helped pay for the clean up…and we helped clean up too” I said towards Rogen.

“Oh yeah” he smiled, winking at me; which no one noticed, thank god. I grumbled and blushed as I recalled Rogen professing his feelings for me that day. It was a day I wanted to forget, yet treasured at the same time.

The countdown began the next day; four days. We walked everywhere over town, tagging whatever we could so as not to forget the day. Three days: we all went to Marisa’s and played with her PS2 and watched old Disney movies. Two days: we went to Nikki’s and help pack up the remnants of her room. We found old assignments we had done together and a bunch of random stuff that brought up memories. We created new memories to add to our collection. One day: we played at the school playground, telling stories and laughing. We all knew what tomorrow would bring so we laughed. We laughed till we were crying…then we were just crying. In a group huddle, Marisa, Nikki, and I cried out hearts out and even Rogen let a few tears shed. After it got dark, we wiped our puffy eyes of the wetness and sat in the soft grass that seemed to cool ourselves off. We just stared at the little specks of light. We lay in a somewhat circle. Marisa was between Nikki and me, Nikki was between Rogen and Marisa, and I was between Marisa and Rogen.

“Seems pointless, doesn’t it?” Marisa suddenly stated

“What is?” Nikki asked

“Oh, nothing love?” Marisa said, I could tell in her voice that she had finally accepted Nikki leaving…as well and her not returning her feelings.

“Tomorrow, eh?” Rogen said, while gently moving his hand on top of mine. I know I should have moved it away, but something stopped me. I didn’t care about the guilt. I just wanted to be stuck in the moment.

“Yeah…I really will miss you guys. You’ve been the best friends I could ever ask for” Nikki sighed out.

“Same to you Nik” Rogen said.

“We love you Nikki” I said not taking my eyes off the stars.

We all sat in silence after our brief conversation. We didn’t need to speak, there were no words that could sum up our feelings. We just watched the starts. In a funny way it made me relax. Stars die all the time. They become old and blow up, but in its place a new star is born. I wasn’t sure why, but that gave me peace of mind. Our last night together ended so quickly. The next day was it.

“Bye Nikki” we all yelled after her car as she left the driveway. No one was crying, though we wanted to. But what good would that do. Nikki waved out the window and then she was gone. It was almost dark so we all went home to deal with our loss.

As I lay on my bed, my emotions swiveled and meshed in my head. I truly was going to miss Nikki, but I pictured a new life, a life without her. Maybe this was meant to happen. Maybe Nikki leaving was for the greater good. Marisa had gotten over Nikki and was now talking about trying to get Bailey’s attention. With Nikki gone maybe me and Rogen could…

“Rogen” I though out loud, in a dazed voice. I had never answered him. I wondered if he was thinking of me as well. Something inside of me started to bubble, just like a sizzling pot of water. I took out my phone and called said male.

During our conversation, a lot of hidden and repressed emotions surfaced. A lot of secrets and ambitions and the future came out. We decided to meet the next day and discuss our single statuses together.

Just like the night before, staring at the stars. I felt the same. Nikki was the old star. She died in our eyes, but in her place a new star shone. That star was all our lives, our new lives that is. Nikki was going to be happy wherever she went. And the rest of us were going to create a path to a new future. I felt excitement surge through me at the new adventures us three would have. We might even find a fourth member. But no matter what, we would never replace Nikki, nor could we forget her.