2 Minute Scoop-December 14, 2008

This week’s scoop-

Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich was arrested this week on corruption charges.  Specifically, Blagojevich was accused of trying to make a profit from President-Elect Barack Obama’s vacant Senate seat.  U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald has been following the Governor’s dealings for some time now, suspecting him of participating in fraud.  His suspicions were confirmed in wire-taps of the Governor’s phone calls, where Blagojevich blatantly asked for money and favors in return for the Senate seat.  If convicted Governor Blagojevich could face up to 30 years in prison, but the greater punishment will be 30 years without hairspray for his comb-over.

The pay for play scheme has outraged Illinois residents.  Blagojevich continues in the footsteps of a long line of Illinois Governors that have been faced with corruption charges.  In fact, he is the fourth consecutive Illinois Governor that has been accused.  It is so bad that Illinois’ legislators have decided to make mug shots and fingerprints part of the inaugural ceremony. 

The Illinois scandal has taken the spotlight away from what may be the largest investment fraud in U.S. history.  Investment guru Bernie Madoff confessed to running a Ponzi scheme, with losses estimated over $50 billion.  Although some are shaken by fraud, others said there were plenty of red flags that should have tipped off investors.  Suspicious activity included paper statements, lack of auditing, and payouts to investors in Monopoly money.  Investors are trying to look at the bright side by focusing on the fact that Monopoly money is now worth more than the U.S. dollar.

Finally, in more unusual news a pizza deliveryman fought off a gunman this week with the only weapon he had, a pizza.  It was not just any pizza; it was a hot pepperoni pizza.  Apparently, the scalding pizza was enough to stave off the gunman while the 40-year old delivery man ran to safety.  In related news a Taco Bell cashier was able to injure a gunman who was trying to rob the store by convincing him to eat the new Volcano Crunchwrap Supreme.  Now that’s thinking outside the bun!