Just When You Thought

THE BEGINNING OF THE END
              What have I done to disserve this? To disserve the horrible fait of standing here before Sky crying as if trying to make an ocean? Yes I know what I did was not right, and actually falling for him was the worst part. I just wanted a simple, normal junior year, a year of making friends, laughs, good times, and memories. Instead I got a year of tears, hurt, and confusion.
         But right now, this was my chance to make everything right again. No one, not even I, would get this chance ever again. It was a miracle and it happened to me after life stabbed me in the back. I shouldn’t be blaming life for the naive dictions I made. I actually should be thanking it. Because of life, and the stars aligning, I had been given a 2nd chance because it wasn’t supposed to be this way.
          But then it hit me, the reason for praying so much to have this chance was to have Red, right? If that was the case why was I feeling like this about Sky, these feelings that I couldn’t describe. Could it be? Could it be in fact that just when I thought the whole reason to go back was Red; it was really Sky all along? How could this happen?
         So there I stood and I could see the look on his face, a very blank, dull expression.  I didn’t know how to feel about that look, it was just…there.  Then there were a few moments of silence.
         I had just got done explaining out my whole life story to him. I answered all of Sky’s interrupting questions but yet all I got was a blank reaction?
         My mind was thinking 100 different things, mostly about what he was thinking. Does he now hate me for what I’ve done, or what I didn’t do? Then in the back of my mind a fact from the past slipped to the front. 4 years ago today, was the moment I had experienced love, magic, and the beginning of Sky. The moment I felt satisfaction and security, but as if he’d remember.
         It’s not like I expected everything to turn out this way. I never thought I would even attempt at getting even with the guy who would always hold my heart. Why? Because I knew exactly what would happen. I would fall for him and end up having the plan completely fall from underneath me. The plan had fallen and I was near to falling with it at this moment.
         I was floating on thin air. The only thing holding me up was the air compacted behind me. The friends I had regained, the memories I was starting to have again, the laughs I had wanted the whole year. But if I had all these things why wasn’t there a wall underneath me? What could I be possibly missing?
         What I was missing was the love I fell in love with. The one guy, the last guy I expected, that made me feel like a million bucks. He’s the one guy who healed my heart by a string, on his sleeve, and everywhere else. He could dangle it any which direction he choose. I referred to him as my fait holder, but he’s better known as Sky Masson.
         “What do you want to do? It’s up to you?” Sky told me holding his hand out to me grabbing it tight in attempt to comfort me. This made my heart leap, my wall was built, my mind was complete. He had given me back my heart, the one I’ve been without for months, years even. I had been waiting for this moment to finally have it in my position again. Of course, when I got it, I didn’t want it. “You mean it’s up to us.” I said looking up at him with my heart, my soul in my eyes.
         This is my story of how the oddest things make you realize what was there and now is gone, and what was always there. This life experience also taught me there is always a side of the nice girl no one knows about. And that was me, the nice girl who wanted to get “bad” and get even. But also knowing me that plan would backfire, leaving me in mid air.
          My name is Liz Keft, and this is my whole world in one experience. All I have to say to sum up this life is, it’s a life of surprises baby, and what we do with them is how our life is determined.