Tattered Soul

This work does not, I feel, represent my writing ability.  This story is the first thing I posted to the site.  For sentimental and constructive purposes, I do not intend to revise this work.  As I learn to be a  better writer, I like to look back on this story to remind myself that I have actually been learning things.

         The night had seemed so long, but it would be over soon.  Soon people of Riding Winds, a moderately sized desert village not far from the barrier hills of Mor'Were Mountains, would be busy with the many activities and duties of the community.  The village's cooking fires would be lit and men and women would laugh and talk before the hunters left for the morning hunt, and the day's labors were upon them.  This was a good village with honest hard working people.  The village itself was far from any other.  For some forgotten reason, possibly to protect against the raiders that had plagued the region a generation before, Riding Winds was the only village to purposely place itself so adjacent to the many threats of the nearby mountains.  The seclusion from other villages outside of trading and the occasional messenger had only brought the citizens closer together and made the community stronger.  Only the old timers had ever known anyone who had been brave or stupid enough to try any amount of exploration in the passes of Mor'Were, and their stories were often so fantastic as to discredit themselves.  Still, the mountains had a reputation of being somehow evil.  No one ever showed any interest in testing the mountains themselves, except of course curious children who were strictly forbidden.  The closeness of the villagers combined with generations of enduring a harsh life full of dangers and uncertainties made any sneaking off an impossibility.  And so it was with no small amount of trepidation that Jasper lay awake after a fitful night of nightmares, and imagined more soberly the kinds of things that might or might not await him when morning finally came.

         Jasper looked over to watch his brother who was sleeping facing the other direction.  He wondered if Galen had any of the same uncertainty that stirred in his own mind.  If so, Galen didn't show any physical signs of it as he slept quite soundly.  Of course there was no fear in his brother, at least not anything of the childish nature that stirred within himself.  I am being childish, I know that.  But knowing it's not helping.  Childishness was forgivable at least, given that he was in-fact a child, but he was afraid that he was really being a coward.  Not for the first time he longed to be more like Galen, the older one, the stronger one, the faster one.  The better one? He knew his parents nor anyone else thought like that, except sometimes Galen himself, but how could he not.  He never knew anything that Galen didn't, never did anything Galen hadn't already done long before, and often better.  He had always learned from his older brother, who was more than willing to teach, either for desire to help his younger brother or to assert big brother dominance he couldn't guess.  But he was always the learner, never the teacher.

         This normal sort of relationship among siblings was enhanced by their father's recent injury that kept him from hunting.  In reality, Jasper was still too young to be going on a hunt, and his older brother was still a year or so shy of becoming a man and officially a hunter.  Galen was still at the age that he would normally only accompany his father so that he could learn all that he needed to know about being a hunter. There was quite a bit of information to assimilate such as tracking, different animals anatomy and behavioral patterns, signs of danger in weather and many other dangers of the land itself.  However, given their father was easily one of the village's best and most productive hunters, Galen had already learned just about everything he could, and even managed to gain some respect from other men for his accomplishments.  It was for this reason that he had been allowed to take up his father's role as the primary hunter in the family and why Jasper had been allowed to go with him, even if Jasper was only allowed to carry equipment and help with dressing the kill and carrying it back.  When they were hunting, Galen's authority was now of a realistic sort, unlike the "cause I'm older than you" kind.  Therefore Jasper decided he would not mention his fear or desire to back out of their plan to Galen.  If His brother would normally be annoyed with his younger brother trying to talk sense to him, how would he react to his student second guessing him?

         The last few hours of night passed slowly for Jasper.  He longed for morning but also dreaded its coming.  lying in bed without hope of sleep was nearly to the point of being painful, but to wake up meant to confront a day that he feared would be a horrible memory at the least.  It was his mother that first woke, but jasper could not simply jump out of bed now that someone else was awake.  It would be obvious that he had be up for some time, and his mother would no doubt be motherly about it, asking mother-like questions about his health and wanting to know if anything was the matter.  Any questioning at all might easily cause Jasper to betray himself and confess to what he knew his parents would be furious about.  So, he waited a few minutes until he could pretend to be woken up by his mother's stirring and dramatically stretched his arms and gave as convincing a yawn as he could.

         "Awake so soon?  You slept alright didn't you?"

         "Yes mama," he searched for an explanation, "I'm just excited that's all."

         "Ah, my little hunter has awaken ready to grow and become a man has he?  I won't pretend that I like the idea of you going with your brother today."  She saw the look on his face and misunderstood.  "Not to worry, I wouldn't deny you now, its to late for any of that. I know you will listen to your older brother who knows much about hunting, but that is my worry."  She laughed in the soothing manner in which only a mother can.  "I don't know what will happen to my little man if he listens too well, he might come back a man indeed, and with all the pride and arrogance that goes along with manliness."

         "I won't be proud mama"

         They both got up and began to gather the clothes and tools the boys would need that day, and then dressed before they left their house to go and help the other villagers begin cooking breakfast.  They decided to let the other's sleep until the food was prepared because Galen was not great with morning's and their father was growing increasingly grumpy with the pain of his leg.  When they got to one of the cooking fires Jasper helped his mother gather some pots and pans that she would need and began work grinding corn that could be used for bread.  He had always loved breakfast, so many people gathered and talking and having fun made him feel better somehow.  He also enjoyed shoveling coals onto the heavy pots that were placed into the ground to bake bread.  He knew that when he began hunting he would no longer be required to help with breakfast, but he enjoyed the work, and wouldn't have been able to pretend to sleep anymore anyway.

         While he was working, he entertained himself with listening to the adults talk and gossip.  Most of the discussion recently was on the lack of meat the hunter's were able to bring in.  This made Jasper uneasy.  For the last few months the hunters had been bringing back less and less meat.  There was fear that someone from another village had actually, for the first time anyone could remember, been poaching from Riding Winds' territory.  "Bet it was Far Mist," one villager said.  "They have been having trouble too you know."  Jasper doubted that, Far Mist depended on Riding Winds for water during dry seasons because the nearest oasis was in their territory, and they wouldn't dare risk a war with the village that had some of the best hunters in the region.  Besides, what the villagers always seemed to over look was that sometimes animal carcasses had been found strangely mutilated, left with many bones that could be turned into useful tools and skins that had great tanning potential.  This was why Galen had decided that he and Jasper would travel closer to the mountain's than anyone ever dared, because no poachers would ever go there.

         After breakfast, Jasper and Galen began their journey to the barrier hills of Mor'Were Mountains.  They carried only a few tools, some left over food, and Galen's bow and quiver of arrows.  Jasper held the reigns of a small donkey that could be used to drag any large game back home.  It was decided the donkey, affectionately named Stew because of his age and the idea that he would soon better serve as food than anything else, would not be ridden so that he might conserve his energy for the trek home if they indeed were able to kill anything of size.  Galen seemed to be rather chipper and was even talkative as they began the expedition, giving Jasper tips on pacing himself so that he wouldn't tire out and telling him about how he would learn how to dress an animal before carrying it home and how if they were successful Jasper would be the envy of all the other boys his age.  Jasper knew, however, that in the event of any achievement, he would preform a meaningless role, and would in fact be less entitled to any claim of greatness than even Stew, who would have to endure the brunt of the labor.

         After a few hours of listening to his brother's instructions Jasper decided to change the conversation.

         "So, is it true that no one has ever been through the mountains?"

         "No one that ever came back" Galen smiled

         "Then maybe we shouldn't go."

         "Now?"  Galen was suddenly angry.  "You wait until now to decide you don't want to go? Too bad! You're going now, and we are not turning back."

         "I don't want to turn back!" Jasper lied.

         "Well, then what are you on about?"

         "I'm just saying, what makes you think we are so special that we can go where no one else can?"

         "We're not going through the mountains, we are only going around the hills."

         Jasper frowned. "Close enough."

         Galen saw the look on his brother's face and felt a twinge of guilt.  The truth was that he had felt the same fear as his younger brother, and now realized that acting brave was not helping the way he
thought it might.  He gently grabbed his brother's shoulder and stopped walking.  "Lets eat. Give that ol' bastard a break."  He nodded towards a grateful looking Stew.  They sat near a Bolder and unpacked the flat bread and water they had brought with them from the morning meal.  Stew silently enjoyed a small bucket of grain and some water that he had been carrying for himself.  As they ate, Galen decided to confess the truth to Jasper.

         "Look, it doesn't make sense if you think about it."  Jasper wasn't sure what his brother was talking about and his look reflected as much.  Galen went on.  "If no one had ever been to the mountains and came back alright, then how would we have any of the stories?"  Galen paused.  "Here's what I think.  I think they are made up.  The adults don't want kids playing around them, not to mention it helps ward off outsiders.  Maybe, some time ago there was something that lived in the mountains, but even if that was true it could have been killed, and would have died on its own by now.  As for the other stories, well you don't really believe in ghosts do you?" Jasper shook his head, perhaps a little to hesitantly.  "I even think the hunters sometimes go there, but if any of them do, they wouldn't tell anyone it was safe because it would mean others would start to hunt there."

         Jasper did look a bit more at ease as he considered this possibility, but he was obviously still not completely convinced.

         "Look, I didn't want to tell you about this.  There is talk in the village about father.  They say his time has passed, that he will never fully heal."  Galen stopped and considered not going any further, be decided that he was already committed.  "A few days ago, father and I were walking home, and we over head a group of old men make comments about father's leg.  They... They even made comments about mother, about how they would take care of her when she grew tired of tending to a cripple.  I.. I've never seen father so angry, he didn't say anything, just kept walking, but he wanted to fight them.  I think he wanted to kill them, but he did nothing and it was because I was with him.  You understand, he knew he couldn't win a fight, not even with the old motherless..."  His voice trailed off into a mumble of words Jasper wasn't old enough to understand.  "He couldn't win, Jay, And he knew it.  Father's not a coward! It was me. He couldn't let me see him lose, that would be to much, and so for his son he denied himself the honor of defending mother.

         Jasper didn't know what to say, he hadn't known any of this, he hadn't known the other men in the village could even be this way.

         "Don't you understand, We are his sons.  We do nothing that isn't partly his doing. If we can hunt, and bring back more game than the other hunters, then it is the same for him as if he had done it, we know nothing he hasn't taught us.  Our glory is his, this is the only way we can help our father, Jay."

         Jasper nodded, he understood this, and would not want to turn back anymore, but he was still afraid.

         "Look, I have something for you Jay.  Father gave me this to give to you. Its tradition that on your first hunt, if there is a kill, then you are to dress the animal and you are given a knife.  That knife becomes yours.  Father has been working on yours since he hurt his leg, but Im not supposed to tell you, incase we don't get a kill.  I'll show it to you, and let you hold it, but I will keep it until we kill something, and if we don't you wont be able to have it until we do.  You have to promise not to tell anyone I did this. Promise me little brother."

         Jasper nodded eagerly.  "I promise!"

         Galen searched in his pouch for a moment and produced an elegant knife, that closely resembled the one he had carried and that jasper had long envied.  He handed the knife to Jasper.  Jasper studied the knife and was immediately in love with it. He had no idea the hunter's knife was such a ceremonious event. The six inch blade was crafted from bone, and was sharpened to the finest measure.  There are carving's on the blade that identified his village, his family and himself as its owner.  The handle was neatly wrapped in leather and was comfortable in his grip, but large enough that his hand would not outgrow it. He had ever owned anything so beautiful.  He decided then, that he would make his father proud, and he would not let his fear overwhelm him.  Galen took the knife back, and put it in his pouch.  They collected their things and Jasper once again too Stew's reigns and they were off to the mountains.  Jasper was now eager to arrive.

         It was after midday when they finally arrived and had picked  a spot suitable enough.  They hid Stew behind some large rocks and dried vegetation on which he happily nibbled.  After about an hour they decided to move on a little ways, neither of them was ready to give up even though they knew if they left right now they would arrive home after dark.  As they silently slipped across the terrain, hunched over and eagerly searching every crevasse and cranny for any sign of an animal, Jasper was exhilarated with the thought of the game they find.  It was galen that first spotted something, a rustling of dried bushes.  He stopped and Jasper quickly followed his brother's lead.  Galen gave jasper a signal that meant for him to stay and be quite.  Again the bushes moved, the dried branches rustled tantalizingly.  Galen knocked an arrow back and began to soundlessly creep up on the bush.  It was all Jasper could do to suppress his excitement

         Galen swiftly moved around the bush, ready to strike down his prey.  He hesitated a moment before lowering his bow, and releasing the pressure on the arrow.  "The hell..." he muttered loud enough for jasper to hear.  A deer lay on the ground, twitching under the power of nerves that hadn't been informed of the creatures death.  As jasper slowly approached and took in the scene he gasped.  The deer had been killed brutally.  On the creature's stomach were two large holes through which meat and nameless bits of organs where now spilling onto the ground.  They both stared in wonderment for a moment before Galen spoke.

         "No blood."

         "What do you mean?" Jasper looked at the corpse.  "There is blood. There."  He pointed.  "Around the wound."

         Galen looked at his brother and frowned.  "You've never seen all the blood from a fresh kill, but there is usually a lot more.  This whole place should be covered in it.  And whoever killed it, why did they just leave it here.  I don't understand."

         As if to answer Galen's confusion, a loud guttural barking sound came from... where? behind a rock? No.  Where then? Again the noise came.  From underneath?

         The boys looked at each with dread and uncertainty.  Both were hoping for an explanation from the other, but neither had one.  A large section of ground began to tremble and rose out of the ground slightly,and then flew into the air revealing a tunnel they would have never guessed had been there.  Again the guttural barking sounded, but much louder and clearer.  It was answered to the left and the right as similar eruptions revealed secret tunnels.  Jasper was dimly aware that everything around him seemed to be moving, even the rocks seemed to crawl.  Not the rocks.  What was all over the rocks?  What the hell was happening?

         "Run!"

         Jasper was frozen, what was his brother yelling?

         "Run Jay! Please run now!"

         Jasper understood but he rand the wrong way, towards galen.  Towards his brother.

         Galen grabbed his younger brother's arm and and began to run, his hand on his brother's back, pushing him forward.  Jasper jumped over a small ledge but his brother's hand tightened around his shirt,
throwing off his balance and he rolled to the ground.  Jasper turned to see that has brother was lying down on the ground hanging slightly over the edge.  Galen had tripped.  No, he was pushed to the ground. Rising from Galen's shoulder was what looked a cruel spear with barbs running up the front side to the point where it bent downward and went out of Jasper's view.

         "GALEN!"

         Galen didn't stand, but screamed with agony as the spear that pierced his shoulder shifted and then another appeared on the ledge, again bending out of Jasper's view.  Jasper ran to the ledge and tried to climb back up.  Whatever was up there was holding his brother, he couldn't imagine what it could be, but felt only panic and didn't have the presence of mind to be afraid.  As he pulled himself up and over the ledge, he looked at nothing but his brother.  He lunged for his brother and knowing only that he had to free him, he grabbed for the strange spear that was still shifting and twisting inside his brother's shoulder. Jasper grasped the the object and with all his might, tried to pry it from his brother, but only managed to cut his own hands on the relentless barbs.  He grabbed his brother's hunting knife and freed it from its sheath.  With the fury of a wild beast he began hacking away at the spear, unaware of the loud gurgling screams that followed his actions, until he had cut the spear in half.  His brother cried in deep pain, but rolled as far as he could manage. He looked at his brother and whimpered.

         "Run.. Jay... run from this.  They have me, don't let them get you brother."  And galen fell to ground.  Unconscious, dead, Jasper didn't know.

         Now, Jasper saw what attacked them.  There were no spears, but legs.  Eight long legs that bent at severe angles to adjoin with a massive round body.  The whole creature was covered with hair, and as jasper stared in wild apprehension, a multitude of frantic eyes stared back him from the creatures head.  The beast had not expected what jasper had done to one of its legs and now shuffled backward, its legs moving with amazing coordination, and to jasper it seemed the whole wold moved with this horrible animal.  The creature screamed with its loud vulgar voice, saliva flinging from its mouth.  As it barked orders to other similar beasts, Jasper was soon surrounded.  He could not comprehend what he saw in the horrible visage of the monster, but he was overcome with dread and fear for his life.  His instincts took control of his body and he ran, still grasping his brother's knife.  He ran as fast as he could, turning only once to see the large beasts quickly moving over the terrain in a manner that froze his heart.  He also saw what must have been an army of much smaller but similar creatures descend on this motionless brother.  He turned and continued to run.

         The night had seemed so long.  Jasper had been walking in what he only hoped was the way home.  The events of the previous day continued to torture him.  His mind was as weak as his body.  He had forgotten all about stew in his haste to get away from the monsters, in his haste to leave his brother for dead.  What could he have done? Something. Why didn't I do anything? Jasper fell to his knees and wept, not for the first time that night.  His entire body throbbed with pain.  He was dimly aware that he had lost a shoe, and his foot was bleeding. I'm broke.  So broke.  Dead.  He sprawled himself out in the sand.  Swallow me up desert sand.  Take me away.  Sun, rise from sleep and burn me, consume me, leave not even my bones.  Please!  PLEASE! He stabbed the sand with his brother's knife. Take me down!  Wash me away so that I cant feel anything ever again! Somewhere between his sobs, fatigue conquered him and sleep came.


         "When we found him, he was unconscious.  From what little he said, we can only guess that he and his brother were near the mountains.  Something happened, and the brother may be dead.  This little guy made it away with his life, but I have a feeling he has seen horrors that even a grown man shouldn't have to endure.  We'll take him into his village tomorrow, for now just watch over him and calm him if he wakes."

         The woman now in charge of Jasper nodded.  She held his shoe in her hands and examined it.  With tears in her eyes she looked at the boy, bruised and beaten.  She whispered.  "Poor boy, how long did you walk exposed in that desert?" She held the shoe out.  "The sole is completely worn away."



Finally I finished this! Well in its rough form anyway. Please tell me what you think. I know this needs a lot of improvement.