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political poetry, post-traumatic stress disorder of a poet at the death of Bangabandhu |
IN THE LIGHT OF WINTER FULL MOON In the thick fog of winter your face is in no way seen clearly- As if by the violent stroke of Mahin's horse Torn asunder scorched ornaments of colour that Suddenly fell on transparent glass and turned upside down. Yet I know, you are covering your bashful face by two hands There is only weeping- silent fall of tears. I see In severe cold that pierced your dress A small body is trembling like a pigeon And someone with ruined stroke of colour is trying to cover your holy face, Terror stricken trembling look, time and again. At last overcoming all hindrances of winter You came out from the inherent soil of Bengal And uncovering yourself totally You are exposing those frenzied gatemen easily Who wanted to darken your Bengal By hijacking your entire moon light. Yet in this bone penetrating thick foggy night of winter What a marvelous full moon light glows In the bare settlement of the north. And in that full moon light From the shade of the stroke of Mahin's horse's tail I see your trembling adolescent face As if a sharp green unctuous portrait of Bengal. THIS SHORE THAT SHORE How long is the path, yet there is barbed vigilance in that path. There are innumerable birds, yet a solitary bird sings there. Severing bondage of the same blood the bird that fled away It's cry wets, aha, a dreamy Rakhi. I see thousands of flowers bloom in the offshoots of Krishnachura. In that frontier of fire, I don't get any shelter. Sitting in the raft of cloud of the single sky we two Seek memoirs inside memoirs sometimes unmindfully. Sometimes want to touch those left out feelings with two hands Sometimes it seems to be definite-sometimes uncertain. FOR A BRAVE LADY In the full moon light of Magh, once the lady that came down From the golden throne to the hard rock of the earth, In the sinless vanity of obstructed wings she wanted to win The difficult heart of a hunter lad; She did not know of any passion She was not aroused by any corporal lust; In severe thirst like infatuated fog Her heart rhythm was oscillating And in the skin pores of the hunter lad Then reigned only loathsome cry of a starved tiger; Beneath its cruel paws was heard injured, scalded And wounded groans only of a girl's taintless scorched meat. Thereafter her turning around. As if inside the luminous light with an oblique trident in hand Insolent bragging of a demon- destroying Apparition of a woman trembled the whole earth; And even knowing the irresistible fate of that trembled earth She, one by one, bit by bit, pulled with much effort From inside the variegated masks, loathsome skeleton of those people- Who remaining camouflaged inside their Masks so long covered unknown countenances of themselves; Whose hunger was more dangerous than hungry tigers? Whose drooled saliva floated Bay of Bengal Those garrulous nudity that came out of the shade of their garments - which was undisclosed, invisible and concealed. This time the face that came out from exposed nudity In the fire of their combined wrath, Body of Lolapangi is burning From inside her breasts smells of ruined meat are coming out. As if her vagina is not any cave opening that longs for human birth As if it is full of explosives containing lava of a volcano- Which in one moment can torn asunder And turn the earth into a frightening wreckage. That is why green wilderness is burning At the fire of your wrath now You are shouting in one voice as your masks are falling down One by one The spark that emanating from inside the fireball of Your eyes tried to burn the breasts of that over daring lady She is now beyond your reach; Now her voice will not be silenced by the bragging Of your ten crores of golden coins; From inside the darkness like naked ferocious animals Your fire of murderous instinct Will not be able to touch her hair tip now; For now she is not that small lass Coming down from the golden throne Inside the cover of moon light. Now she is undulating, now she is the embodiment of Lolapangi; Coming hastily from the ancient city, sister of love sick dead Munya. She is now scattered in the sky, in the netherworld, In planets and stars, In the boundless province of the earth. Look there, prostrating before her feet is your ugly mask; In sun light your piece meal faces are undulating softly; You did not understand, all your unseen vanity in a moment can prostrate near her feet like unsmelt fallen flowers. So for that brave girl You have nothing to do except Looking dolefully out for some distant eternal star For eternal time. MASK Masks fell off from the faces The brave girl spat upon; She is sitting alone in the fire of rage; Tickle reigns in secret organs. Those who set sail in the current of progress They are now shackled in reaction; hypocrites wear tiger skin, They are the obstacles in resisting the upstream. Faithful beings do not know them, The girl first identified that face; Those who loiter in empathy, Saliva drools in those lips- they are uncouth, They did not understand the truth at the sudden explosion As pomegranate juice oozes after rupture; As if the enraged is engaged in war Anyhow will tame her. But that girl did not obey him at all Only untied her breast's knot; Those whose names are written in her private parts She raised them in social boat. Because of that incident fire spread everywhere, Those faces are oscillating behind the mask; The moon of the last night faded away Oscillates heart inside sleep. Seeing this the girl weeps alone, Wild animals are caught in the net; The girl sees eclipse in the moon, That is why she walks from eternity to eternity. WHERE IS THE END OF THE PATH? If there is no end of the path Then what responsibility do I bear that, In searching that path I shall get tired and being depressed Shall look over alone in tearful eyes; And after traversing a lot of distance And standing in front of a vast empty wilderness like the horizon Shall ask silently only to myself: 'Where is the end of the path?' In fact, does anybody not know 'Where is the end of the path?' Long, long ago, before crossing adolescence my dear friends Shymol, Animesh and Ratan while looking out for a faraway planet In search of the path Suddenly drowned in the western sky like the marooned sun one day- After many days as their shadows of memoir trembled in the darkness Again the same question continued to prick me: 'Where is the end of the path?' Before the turning of the year one day I came to know that Tuli's left this place, Shashanka also left with Iti Di In childhood days without informing anybody Shashthi Moktar With his son Anadi when left bag and baggage towards an Uncertain dark path-then it seemed: From each of our life something is breaking down, As the shore of Uzanchalk breaks down At the pull of all consuming Jomuna, As transparent water is lost in its whorl like bubbles - Like that Everything is becoming translucent. One day when the cavalry brigands wearing iron vest With insolent vanity of victory in chest Bragged their glory exhibiting armed demonstration in the universe; Then Ranudi's left for another homeland- Shiladi also To Artipur- unknown Bengal. A pull was observed in our root- Folds appeared on my father's forehead, Tear line accumulated in the eye's corner of mother As if informed everybody like perpetual mourning sign: Get ready. Then also one question whorled repeatedly inside consciousness, 'We will go but where is the end of the path?' I don't see Saraswati for how many days, she is in Ghatshila now Shiladi's sithi is devoid of vermillion- In the parentless, brother and sister less abode in fright of solitude Occasionally only her syllables of letter groan: 'Brother, shall not we live again together someday?' Streams of our tears crossing Padma-Meghna-Brahmmaputra When reaches the shore of the Ganges And strike their heads repeatedly, we fail to understand. Still today we are in the middle of the path. The path following which we shall advance In that path with glittering swords in hands who are standing; Raising two hands in the sky they ordered: Wipe out all signs of the past, Destroy museum, destroy sculpture, Along with change of faith Change the succession of blood if necessary. So, like a flock of refugee in darkness in search of a destination Except looking out for the path And advancing forwards what else we can do? Tattering darkness of night the light that ushers dawn To take bath in that light On this side of the path those who are waiting Do you know them? If not, where is the end of the path, where is the end of the path' Asking this question repeatedly do not embarrass them any more ! In their eyes eternal sleep Let them sleep a bit this time. BY THE PAINTBRUSH OF TIME Suddenly when the sky came down Closer to the earth leaving horizon All reverberations, noise stopped, Unconscious bee lay on the leaf. The cowboy is returning in the evening twilight Bats are hanging in the shade of trees Boat song in the voice of exhausted boatman Obedient air in his sail. Ulu sound is reverberating far and near Oily lamps glow in basil ground Intimate dear ones are indulging In a revel-route captivating heart in Sithi and Vermillion. Then at the solitary house corner two solitary souls Sitting face to face are writing all musical notation of emotion And raising some memorial songs in heart. Their paired together lips are trembling In front burns flame of lean lamp Fragrance of body in the wings of swan couples Both are floating in the unfathomable ocean water. Yet much remained untold then Still in both eyes didn't descend incessant rain Still did not appear moving eagerness of estrangement Still did not tremble hands over hands. Thirst was not quenched, passed how many eras His touch was not felt in organs and organelles When passed twilight hour Still remains weight of shoreless estrangement. Sleep of dual-coupled eyelids Was snatched by silence of night In the restless agitation of trembling light In one life all conversation will not end. So, sitting in the midst of silence both of them See with eyes unwinking look In silenced lips overwhelmed awakening Will be drawn by paintbrush of time in eternity. IF INDICT SCEPTER If indict scepter- I shall accept tamely. If there is any unpardonable mistake, And for that mistake if geographical boundary is changed, If the hurled arrow of son floating in emptiness penetrate your corpus As mythological missile what punishment will you give then? If indict scepter - I shall accept tamely. Father, once you were inside my dream, In your dream I found My integral, blue sky; But you know father, Those dark clouds of Sravana that cover that beautiful transparent blue sky And the thunderclap that hides behind it With insolent grudge burns the earth to ashes, I am that deluded boy raised from that howl of fire I never understood that By striking you I am striking the very root of my existence. For that audacity, any punishment that you will give me- I shall accept tamely. If indict scepter, if indict banishment To the inaccessible deep forest of Africa I shall accept, this is my desired reward of suicidal destruction. Father, if I could realize that, for my mistake so much blood, So much liquid filth would be deposited in the fatherland, If I would know, in the sacrificial place of Nikumbhila My map would be coloured by your breast’s blood, If I could know, in midnight your apparition would come And kill you by it’s merciless two hands; If I would know, your motionless body will lie Bloodstained on the starved stair; If I would know, from your heart seven crores of bloodstream Would flow through the steps Then I would, By each finger of this hand would stifle firmly My nonplussed soul, I would plunge towering thorns of Shimul into my eyes. If you would rouse from sleep, in my breast piercing affliction, You would see with folded hands beside your feet lay your son, genuflected. How could you deny him with your merciless two hands? I know, Your heart was a calm affectionate river; Flowing like transparent fountain in the shade of mountains Your heart was a monochord of Baul, tired boat-song. Father, did you know, the water that emanated from your heart Would one day forgetting everything regurgitate yourself In the Bay of Bengal? Without you, that soil will groan beside the shore of Madhumati? If you would know, if you would know This responsibility of fatherhood will one day be repaid By your blood money; Then also would you become the freedom-hymn of subjugated people. That pierced the soil of this homeland? Father, today you are not here - only your shadows remain. In very dawn piercing sky the marooned sun that rises In the eastern sky Its deep colour mixing with the green nature Emanates what a miraculous shade from horizon to horizon. I see you there. In my respiration of each moment You enter as perpetual air. Your perpetual presence in my whole existence Transforms me into you; It means I do not have any separate existence without you. Yet fearing your absent existence A group of hunters wants to smudge Layers of darkness over your shadow. Once whom you bonded by your warm hug of heart, They over the pride of your existence Want to smudge black darkness of twenty five Your apparition comes to Bangabhumi without yourself. Father, to err is human This body of mine is servant to that error. If possible, forgive this despicable son. And those who want to change the soil of this homeland Bought by your blood money, Who want to embellish sectarian mark on red green flag? If your forgiving hand one day runs to the wilderness Give me also banishment that day Drop me to any deep forest crossing this earth. If indict me scepter- if my body becomes motionless in the gallows Everything I shall accept tamely; But I'll never accept Combined killer darkness of August stifling my chest. DARKNESS Black darkness is chasing from all sides That transparent white cloud which was loitering like variegated dear in the bluish sky-it is now rushing towards the deep forest Panting in fear of Kalapahar. And the horizon that appeared free like the wings of birds Now thick cloud like rock is about to engulf it As if at the combined attack of thunderbolt and lightning The sky will torn asunder over the head. This earth, this nature, this habitat Never heard this type of severe groaning. This ear penetrating scream of people Never dashed to the ground with such force. Then crossing the dense black cloud Will never ever come out moon lit night? Piercing darkness of night will never come morning sun rise? What type of cloud accumulated in the sky? What type of thunderbolt is it- all consuming severe smite of lightning? Is this then revenge of nature? Is this then Nemesis- our merciless fate? Where to we have come? Crossing long path of black night In search of which light We came by mighty cyclone And current of deluge Erosion took place in that ground now- From the summit of mountain rolls big chunks of rocks, And by its strike torn asunder around Our much toiled dream habitat. The river that flows through the calm and Quiet nature of the earth The fountain that comes down along the slope of mountain Taking bath in its water, whenever we are hoping to see the world At our heart's content, Then and there the earth is trembling at a mighty tremor In the layers of horizon is dancing festival of death From within the surroundings of all pervading black cloud We know not any path to get out. O time, o eternity, o morning of sunrise you only tell us- Where shall we go now? Mighty darkness is chasing from all sides Thick cloud is coming fast like Kalapahar As if ringing the bell of death. From the hand of this life destroying death he who can save us - We have nothing to do than to wait for the guardian deity who rushed in search of Vishalyakarani. So much darkness around us now! AFFECTION While walking on the street- Lata calls from the side: Wait a bit, brother, I've something to say, some tales.' Taken aback, I stop suddenly at the call Lata's touch I feel in the chest- get her fragrance in nose Sleep descends in both of my eyes Pin drop silence prevails in the universe – Totally silent, noiseless-speechless Through it flock of birds fly to the horizon Inside the waves of air only restless wings return home; Amongst the birds One grayish kite stands still like a wall painting As if it in very dense bluishness tells some doleful dialogue Mental affliction intensifies while walking along the path. Gradually blooms yellow morning; Only yesterday which was old, which was past Morning sun comes and breaks its foundation Only clearly reveals present in it I give ear to: Hear sweet murmurs of birds, sweet voice of cuckoo Anything which is amazing, Which is surprising and anything which is beautiful. I see it opening my eyes, see bird's nest. Indifferent look to the empty sky alone What I want to see is not seen; Calls some unknown, unfamiliar bird Taken aback I look at the side of the street- As if some dumb founded tree In darkness compassionately shall show their dance. So chest trembles in shudder Creepers embrace hard chin all over Feel warm hug of heart Mind soaks in sky exhausting rain. Cannot go - where it was intended to go Only heart afflicting air blows inside the chest. So nothing is told Walking stops. Conversation stops While trying to walk forward see creepers rolled up bit by bit in legs. THE HUNTER'S MOON The cloud is like the wings of a falcon - Inside its orifice conjurer moon stands still In such a way that its dwelling is perpetual. In this surprising moonlight of Dhaka's sky We some poets are drinking silently Silvery Medeira of moon. May be sometimes later cloud will disappear; Looking at its insolent face it seemed: A tall Dinosaur is advancing towards the stellar sky To engulf the whole horizon. This momentary scenario that produced an illusive magic in the neurons of our brain, Getting lost in that trap we looked winkless to an endless bluish sky. Getting out from inside the explosion all around, sitting on the Back of the falcon we only continued to fly Like Neil Armstrong to an unknown earth of moon. Thinking and thinking our whole body turned wet In dews of moon light- at the shivering of smoothness Our stone body continued to shudder repeatedly. For how many times we have not seen such moon in the sky. Who today sits in the moon-congregation and Pours such packets of light to our earth? Landing on the moon soil what great was uttered by Neil Armstrong? That tale was not known- may be one day it will be known, One day magic of moon light hypnotism will carry us To a further homeland of a star. Will anybody like you welcome us with a smiling face? In this full moon night the sky wore light tip In the forehead; Beneath it we some poets are looking winkless With surprised eyes- as if nature has caught fire. In its blazing flame may be remains some scorched face like moon- That face one day bloomed inside offended state of mind. This full moon coming down from inside the cloud Will transform into total estrangement And mix up with lamp-black of our eyes. Today, that is why such a big arrangement of moon light. In this moment we some poets will not in any way Drop our eye lid. Look there, the full moon has come out from the shade of the cloud, Unveiling herself in the dark-blue sky as if you are standing like light. SCEPTICISM You say malefeasancé, say loveless treachery; Say detached disinclined love-sick. I listen silently paying heed to it- I don't say anything. The heat of fire burning on the other side of the shore touches my body I talk in an unknown tongue like a timid cockatoo, Still I cannot save myself from that combustion of fire anyway. I try to get out of the burnt cottage. Shout loudly, 'Save me.' Familiar known faces giggle. Somebody whispers to my ear Asks, 'Why are you so indifferent to motherland, my child?' I don't say anything. Drops of tears shed from my two eyes. Staking my life I try to uproot my last abode of existence And throw it to some unknown deep river From where floating and floating, one day I shall reach some unknown burnt-out port. Yet this body of mine is as if a motionless rock The more I want to roll it further The more it wants to grasp the intrinsic roots. Legs stumble in nettles, From inside grasps hypnotizing creepers Cannot disentangle it in no way Behind me is the death-well In front impassable sharp darkness; In which direction shall I go? FESTIVAL OF DEATH IN DARKNESS The sun set in the western sky a bit earlier. There is pin drop silence in all directions. In deep forest crickets' chirpings are heard. Off and on fireflies glow like stars. Nature trembles piercing the shrouds of nature. In darkness suppressed respiration of Some cowards and terror stricken people At the tremor of gently blowing breeze is rushing Towards the shore of horizon. Dividing the darkness into two by the sharp weapon Like sword alien cavalrymen are advancing in a breath. At their harsh voice forest, nature is torn asunder. Blood is gushing out from the body of some people Imprisoned with shackles saliva is coming out from their lips, and Surrounding them those cavalrymen who are engaged In celebration of victory- in their faces eyes there is fire of murderous instinct In their jaws solemn resolve of change- Their chest is mighty with Oath of commitment. Right at that moment in the body of a fugitive prince remains Tattered robe of disguise; At the mortification of defeat he is hunchbacked, At the corner of eyes afflicted tears, At the sound of wind flapping of birds stillness of night Is smashing into smithereens. The universe Is groaning at the wailing of dogs far and near. There is chanting of hymns from sacred books Cavalrymen are dancing with cloaks over their bodies, Turbans in heads, medieval swords in hands. In this night goblets will be filled in by the blood of the heathens! In sky, in air, there will be reverberations of victory of weapons; In darkness in the festival of death will rouse nature, forest; All preparation for it is complete- Mighty cataclysm will take place at the blowing of Israfil's trumpet. 'Forgive me, forgive me, forgive me, lord' Those who beg in doleful voice, Their doleful voice is extinguished by the giggle of the cavalrymen. All longing fails. All affliction drifts in blood stream Shackled men raising both hands groan: 'O sun, O morning, O lord of the day, Piercing darkness come up to this frenzied universe, once for all; Deliver us, leave us in a faraway homeland. Only once for all, lord, grant this life once for all- we don't believe in hereafter. There is nothing called second life. Deliver us; rescue us from the shoreless sea...' Pulseless corpses lie in the darkness of forest, in the stunned universe Blood stream only flows to the water of Gangotri. Festival does not end- only it is the beginning of festival. HOLY FIRE The river which I wanted to rouse last night with intent request- She now wants to go back towards the sea lowering its head. Today there is no restlessness in her chest, In her calm face reigns amazing solitude As if at midnight in the flower garden Secretly entered an amateur thief; And in concealment accompanying maudlin cloud He is going to the faraway sky. Today heavy rainfall will take place from cloud- When all flowers will be wet Then affliction in chest will fall on the dust of soil; We shall come and stand On dual forest in dark night- Infatuating dog will be our street companion. I know a bit afterwards the gate of the heaven will be opened; Brothers will go along- One by one dearest ladies will reach there; When the invisible sky will be covered by black cloud He will decorate himself in counter-memoir meditation; From Kailash mountain With circumspection pluck golden flower bloomed in lake. With that dream in chest we shall stand Beside the shore of the river; after the whole night’s rainfall Sea water will be calm and quiet like inconsolable child- Denizens, birds, trees, natural beauties will be clamorous in festival. At last devouring night’s darkness in dawn Sacred fire will come and devour the city in bright light. MY DREAMS I have decorated slices of my dreams in a golden plate. Suddenly this plate descended from the heaven to my courtyard. I brought it with circumspection and placed it In the circle of my chest like a centre; And those dreams lay like Roman sculptures in long awaiting. There is none in the universe- from deep forest Birds fled away to unknown sky- In noise laden Hastina great messenger is drowning, Following natural course those heroes have not returned still. That guide has not come in the disguise of young man- Angel Rafael is going back alone with failed mission- Solitary feather weeps in the golden plate. Shall I sit down grasping the golden plate in My chest till eternity- evaporate fast All my stratified visible dreams like camphor? Chest trembles over the question. Then from the sea comes angry Dolphin; Places its hand on the golden plate- Rushing cavalrymen Instantaneously snatch the dream And disappear in the darkness of dusk In the deep forest's passage in nonplussed air. I sit alone in the river shore- solitary fisherman In my two eyes dances frenzied boat sunk at midnight. |