The Run

I am an achiever, in all the important things in life, that I dedicated my self to, I have been successful. At least that was the case until three years ago!

After spending countless hours in my "at home" job for a big software company, I started to get depressed and frustrated, rapidly gaining weight, and feeling miserable. I went from 155lb to 190lb, and every time I watched my self in the mirror I felt bad, but at the same time in denial. I though that I had it under control. Then it got to the point where I was not capable of doing anything, even the minor chores, were an unsurmountable problem and I was incapable of moving, going out, talking to people, or have any fun.

Exactly one year ago, I had a moment of clarity, where I could see how much I had decayed over the last couple of years, for the first time I was able to look back and really see that I was throwing away all the good things I had, that I was not enjoying my little baby girl, and I was making my self, and those who love me feel miserable. The feeling got so strong that I could not take it any longer, I had to get out of the house, or "the prison" as I called it at the time. So I took off. I left not knowing exactly where I was going or what I was going to do. I started walking and that morning I must have walked about 2 miles, and it felt good. Tired but good, so the next morning I went back and did the same, and so it was for a week or so. Then I attempted to run a little, never was much of a runner, but the fact that I could not run for more than a few minutes at a time was an eye opener. I set a secret goal, just to my self, that I was going to keep trying until I was able to run the 2 mile loop around my house. Did not know how long it would take me to do so, but in the shape I was I felt it was going to be a while. But surprise, surprise (at least for me) when I finally ran those 2 miles continuously I was working out for about 3 weeks, every day. Back then I could not remember the time when I last had worked out that consistently and achieved a simple goal I had set for my self. Those 2 miles were the toughest 2 miles I ever ran, not because of the distance, but because of the depression I was fighting, and the hole I was crawling out of.

A month went by and the miles started to build up, and I felt confident to try my luck at a local 3 mile race. I was able to run it in 27 minutes, non stop. Not much if you're a PRO, but to me was as good an achievement, as anything I had done before, and I was hooked! Did a couple more 3 mile races, always improving the time a little, and in my last one I did 21 minutes. By November I had worked out consistently since March and had not missed a workout for more than a day or two, so I felt I was capable of attempting my first ever half marathon. which I did January 19th 2006 in Miami, in 2:09, three weeks later I ran the A1A Half Marathon in Fort Lauderdale, in 1:54. Today as I train for my first attempt at a marathon I find my self in awe of the progress I have made, I went from barely running 0.2 miles to running 20 miles, from 190lb back to 156lb, and I am in the best shape ever.
I don't think there is a secret formula, to be able to get up early in the morning, sometimes at 4:30 AM to go run. I don't think that there's any magic, any special skill or gift. If you think about it, its as easy as deciding to do it. Just decide, get up, get out, DON'T THINK. DO.
I am literally counting the days to San Diego! I never thought I would find my self flying cross country, spending a bunch of money so I could run a marathon, a full marathon, 26 miles! I KNOW I am going to finish, I KNOW I am going to watch that finish line come closer and closer, and I KNOW that as I cross it I will have left my miserable days behind.

Running as gotten me, and my life back on track!