Remember

Remember

Chapter 1



“A Truth that’s told with bad intent, beats all the lies you can invent”

-William Blake



He woke remembering nothing, to a dimly lit room he did not know, where the only source of light came from an ajar door. He glanced around, surveying the room from the double bed where he lay. A chest of drawers, holding picture frames of people, young and old, he did not know. He surveyed other objects, the fan swirling rhythmically above him, lamps, the curtained windows. Until his dark eyes came to rest at the armchair in the corner.

A young women was sitting there, she looked lovely, long brown hair tied back framed bright blue eyes against a well-structured face. She remained passive sitting there, but it was only when he tried to sit up that she looked up and rapidly spoke with concern.

‘Please lay down, you’ve been in an accident and severely hit your head, I don’t know how much you remember through…’

The sudden news swept passed his ears, he blinked stupidly. He asked the first question that emerged.

‘Who are you?’ he asked. ‘Where am I?’

The young women looked at him, her features relaxed.

‘My name is Jodie’ she spoke quietly. ‘I am your wife, this is your home’

Wife? The word did not apply to him, but he slowly was beginning to feel a deep satisfaction that he was married to this pretty young women. From the light that escaped through the door he saw a pair of dark eyes, looking concerned at him.

‘They’re…I have children then?’ he asked.

She nodded, got up and moved quietly across the room, shutting the door behind her. She spoke in whispers.

‘Don’t disturb your father’ she said. ‘He’s come home very tired and confused, he just may not remember some things right now…but they’ll come back eventually’

There was something in her voice, he traced sharply, was something of fear.



He slept a little longer, until the door creaked upon again and a small girl around seven entered.

‘Mum said to give you this’ she said, holding up a small tray. ‘You ask for it all the time’

He took it and glanced down at breakfast, it looked like a banquet. A pile of scrambled Eggs, bacon, toast, all piled onto one tray, he felt embarrassed at the load and put it on the side table, wondering how long his ’wife’ had slaved over it. The girl looked at him confused, usually her father demanded silence until he had eaten. Instead he looked at her with a different, softened expression that she liked.

‘I’m sorry I don’t remember you, but what’s your name, what Dad am I to you?’

‘Bianca’ she teased. ‘Don’t you remember anything Dad?’





Days passed, After taking Bianca to school Jodie was about to get into the everyday routine of cleaning the house since she knew her husband normally was anal about the slightest mess when he got home. But when she opened the door, a surprising sight met her eyes, her husband sat at the dining table looking brightly at her, the house around her, clean.

‘I made breakfast for you’ he said cheerfully. Indicating the table laden with scrambled eggs though burned from his first experience.

‘Why-why did you do this?’ she asked, his face fell.

‘I’d thought I’d make it for you, since you do this everyday for me’ he shrugged.

She blinked, surprised at the outfit he was wearing, an apron around his waist, a broom at his side and a headband on his forehead to keep away dust, the appearance was comical. But there was an impish grin on his face, one of childish delight, as though the traditional status had being completely overturned. She smiled nervously, perhaps Amnesia could work wonders, and it was then that she made a plan, if it could work she needed help.



‘Hey Josie, what’s going on?’ Samuel asked, steering her inside his home. Josie smiled at her lifelong friend who could always offer reassurance at the rare times when she could escape the house, while her husband quite happily enjoyed his newfound hobby of cooking and cleaning, Jodie thought such a thing would’ve being impossible to him.

‘So how’s he dealing with his insomnia?’ he asked smugly.

‘Amnesia dear’ said his wife quietly, looking up from her book.

‘He’s been great’ Jodie said happily ‘and for the first time he’s helping me set up his daughters party in a few weeks time, he’s never done anything but work and…I think I can change him, I want you to help, since you work with him”

‘So you want to re-shape him? Completely alter his very being?’ Samuel asked. ‘Jodie, you married that bastard thinking you could…I know he’s hurt you a lot”

Jodie’s hand reached for her shoulder, where a large bruise adorned her skin. She had received it when her husband decided her cooking wasn’t good enough. She looked up and Samuel had his hands in his face, frustrated.

Jodie had gone down a different path to his own, although best of friends since childhood it had never developed into something else. Samuel now thought he was a coward for not taking her back when she fell for that low-life Matthew. First he was sweet-talking and charming, underneath was a mean streak if he did not get his way.

‘Jodie, you should’ve long…’ he began.

‘Don’t tell me to leave him’ she said angrily. ‘He’s doesn’t try it when around Bianca, but with just me…’

His wife suddenly got up and placed her reassuring hands on her quaking shoulders.

‘We will do what we can Jodie’ she replied gently. She shot her husband a glance.

“yeah…’ he replied, but doubting it would work.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~





Laughter returned to the house which hadn’t being heard in a long time, preparations were made for Biancas birthday party which Jodie was surprised but delighted that her once abusive husband took to it so eagerly, he even talked of how similar they looked, how his dark eyes were hers, how they had the same laugh. Jodie was happy to oblige to any questions Matthew had never once said about his daughter in what he forgot.



The day arrived. A chorus of Happy Birthday ran through the house while Matthew brought the cake from the kitchen, alight with eight flaming candles. Bianca blew them out, every adult and child clapped. While Josie watched, feeling more content than ever before, her husband would’ve never been bothered with the lives of his children except if it benefited his own. When she moved forward to cut it, she noticed Matthew whisper something to Bianca and took her by the hand. Josie smiled, to herself as the knife sliced gently through the birthday cake. It could only get better.

Matthew took his daughter aside only for this.

‘I want you to have this’ he said, wrapping a small colourful stitched bracelet around her wrist ‘I have the other one’

Her eyes glowed with delight as she observed the other bracelet her father wore .

‘Thankyou Daddy’ she piped sweetly, then she whispered in his ear. ‘This is the best one the most’

‘Happy Birthday squirt’ he grinned, kissing her lightly on the cheek.

‘Aww, father-daughter moment’ smiled Jodie, appearing and flashing the camera in front of them.

Amidst the calamites of the party with which Matthew was actively involved, when the games were settled and the kids became hyped so much on fizz drink and thus more noise erupted around the house. Jodie found time to drag her husband over to Peter. Whose son was also enjoying the festivities, enjoying looking blushingly over at Bianca.

Automatically, their eyes locked, black against blue.

‘Wow so your out of bed’ said Peter acidly. ‘That’s a world record for you, two weeks I assume?”

Matthew knew that face, knew it well in his mind, but couldn’t’t register a name. All he knew that he felt a great dislike and suddenly wanted to knock it concave.

‘This is Peter, Matthew, you work for him” she smiled, trying to be the peacekeeper, but both men were glaring at each other, wishing nothing but a painful death to the other. Josie suddenly found this a bad idea and steered him away, glaring scoldingly at Peter.

Matthew suddenly felt he needed to be away from all noise of the kids, and retreated to the bedroom, on the beside table he noticed a large book. He had found his wife’s journal, with steady hands he opened it, paper clippings fluttered out. He picked one up and began to read.

“Her lawyer argued that Jodie Royston was acting in self-defence when she attacked her husband with a bat, saying she feared for her life…



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~





A week later after finding the whole truth from the community, he confronted her, and still she remained brave as he grabbed her, shook her, demanded why she had lied and manipulated him, Josie had realised her plan had failed and saw her old husband self coming back. She trembled as those dark, dark eyes pierced her soul. He had snapped, a point of no return until he had taken out all his anger-on her. She would have to face consequences, let him hurt her as he sees fit. Anything to calm her husband down. Try and bring him to his senses that all his wife wanted to do was to save him, he had never woken up from his nightmare until that day she had finally defended herself against his wrath. She spoke words of wanting him to change, to see how good life is to him, that he had her and his child that dearly loved him.

It chilled him to still see that amount of love, faith, devotion in her eyes. When it finally seemed he would calm down. Josie moved forward, her whole body aching to still clasp his body, rocking back and forth silently. She thought that was when it was all over, he would stop his violent ways. Her words whispered in his ear

I will always love you but it triggered him into that rage again

She would never, never understand him!

He violently pushed her back and she hit the other side of the wall. There was a horrible crack as she slid down, knocking her from consciousness. Matthew looked in horror, he never had meant to kill her. He crawled forward and touched her pulse, still alive…



Matthew did not anticipate the arrival of the neighbours, they themselves didn’t need to look in disarray to know what had happened. They had long rung service to arrive at the scene where medics carried an unconscious blood-ridden Josie away, while concerned neighbours waited for police. The other men thought to restrain Matthew but he was sobbing on the floor, Peter gestured them to leave.

He pulled Matthew up by the collar before punching him. All his strength in every knuckle of his right fist.

‘You cold and heartless bastard’ he growled. ‘What you did to her was unforgivable’

He did not answer, he was shaking at the Josie’s blood on his hands. Like a child who had popped it’s own balloon, not knowing its own strength. Peter was breathless with rage.

‘You know why she did that?’ he said bitterly. ‘She loved you when no one else would! She held on to your marriage because she loved you, yet you abused her, you have a family, why don’t you stop living in the past and see how blessed you are, show them that you deserve it!’

A figure ran past him, when Matthew looked up he saw Bianca, tear-stained and terrified behind Peters legs, afraid of him, of her own father.

‘Bianca..’ he croaked, so she had seen the whole thing.

‘I hate you!’ she yelled, throwing the bracelet on the floor.

The rain fell heavily that night, flashing lights whirled around the house. Matthew thought as he was lead away, that if lighting struck him, he would deserve it. That fateful night, Bianca was hurried away by Peter and his wife, they would offer her comfort, warmth, reassurance, until all would be settled.





Chapter 5 -Thoughts



He was dead, what did he care if the rain still pattered gently down upon the roof, notifying his existence? The darkness embraced him without mercy, and he could feel a chill creeping up his body, the past heavy rain had soaked the carpet after the windows had been left open, his wet clothes left to dry uncomfortably against his bedraggled skin. The bedroom was a mess from the past haunting event. Still, the rain simmered, still he sat, sitting with his back against the wall.

Coldness pressed against him as the wind continued to howl and whistle, clanging the shutters of the windows against the wall, he should move up to close them.

But he didn’t move.

He continued to huddle like a child after a frightening nightmare, his cheek still burned and ached from Peters formidable blow. The night felt like a thousand years, and as it drifted into morning. Matthew knew not how many hours had passed since he had almost killed his wife. In his mind he couldn’t deny that it was he who had finally lost control, he couldn’t help but ponder his unforgiving actions and words.

His Memories had come back to him, that much he knew about, the isolation from his multiple families, broken bonds, and the pain it caused him with the almost unbearable feeling of being completely alone. But then something else had come, Josies bright face, marriage, and the birth of their first child. It was all there! but now it was gone again… Taken away by his thoughtless, selfish actions. He blamed everything on her when it was his entire fault.

The Morning light penetrated the window, and the rain intensified once again, turning it into a downcast day. But the rain helped intensify his melancholy thoughts, old memories kept flashing back and forth within the mans head. He raised his neck and laid it against the wall now, taking several deep breaths. The dark-haired man took time to assess the situation.

First, he had utterly lost control and almost killed his wife, secondly his eldest daughter had witnessed the event and loathed him. Third, he saw no way in order to regain his pride and his honour.

Their were many ways a man could fail, losing the respect of his daughter had taught him that, and if he had lost the respect of his wife and his children, even the respect of those around him. Matthew felt he had landed in hell, and hell to him was a house without any inhabitants inside, a house without life and spirit and laughter. No, He didn’t want to lose his family.

He laid his head on his knees, letting his eyelids sink close, scenes from last night flashed before him, he tensed and clenched his fists.

Josie was crying, lying against a wall as blood flowed between her legs, her green eyes flashing with love anger and hurt that was suddenly almost unbearable to him. Screaming, shouting, his daughters eyes staring at him fiercely. Yet still showed terror, brave as a lioness. The images became almost real that he jolted his head up, yet saw nothing but himself, even in the daylight, Hell felt like it was right here.



~



‘Vanessa, are you alright?’ Kim asked kindly.

The little girl looks up at the round-faced women glancing at her through the door opened ajar. The poor girl looked wreaked, her eyes were puffy and bright red. Her cheeks streaked with tear stains, sticking the frame of long hair to her cheeks. But she shook her head, continuing to rock back and forth trying to calm herself. Kim knew the best way for the girl to get over her shock and grief was to let her cry it out, before attending to her.

“You don’t want anything? Not a drink, not a bite to eat?”

‘No thankyou’ she murmured, wiping her tears on the knee of her jeans. ‘I just don’t want Dad to ever come near Mum again, I hate him!”

With that statement, she burst into a fresh wave of tears. Kim was quickly at her side, the seven year old crawled into the young women’s lap, and she rocks the child to and fro.

‘You should never hate your father kiddo’ she said it calmly, but with a slight, firm voice secretly em phasing the word. “Although I know you’re feeling very angry at him right now, and that’s okay…”

Vanessa fell silent, shifting slightly into a more comfy position.

‘Is Mum okay? He hit her really bad, I just want to him to never touch her again! I feel so s-scared…she needs me!’

Kim hesitated, but she knew that kids certainly weren’t blind or dumb to this sort of situation, no matter how protective ignorant parents may be.

‘She’s okay, she’s at the hospital right now, but she’s ok…’ she added, seeing Vanessa slight distraught look in her deep dark eyes uncannily like her fathers. ‘You’ll get to see her really soon’

‘And Dad, what’s Dad…?’

‘Your father is at home right now, but you’ll be staying here for a while…he won’t go near her in time, we’ll make sure of it, don’t worry kid, things will turn out right soon enough in time, only in time….’

She kissed the eight-year olds, soft brown hair and told her she could come out when she felt right. But all that crying had worn out Vanessa’s little body, and when Kim came back, she found her asleep on the bed and so tucked her in.



~



‘So how did it go?’ Kim asked as her husband came back from the hospital.

‘Jose is asleep right now’ he replied, flinging himself onto the couch and rubbing his temples in frustration. ‘But we managed to save the baby, Can you believe that? God, I can’t believe that bastard would hurt a pregnant women! I don’t think she can leave after a few days, or weeks if she wants to avoid that brute of a husband…’

‘At least now she is out of danger…’

‘I should’ve beat some sense into that asshole a long time ago, but if he didn‘t get amnesia I would‘ve never found out about their situation…’

‘It’s not our right to interfere in a married couples trouble, would you had wanted them to interfere?’

‘No’ Peter snorted. ‘But I don’t go around beating my wife in front of my kids’

“What I’m saying is that I’m very glad that you helped them, and she will be fine…Now that he has his memories, I believe that they can talk this through.”

‘They should argue in front of us so that we can restrain if he ever gets violent again’ Peter growled. ‘I didn’t mind beating him up again, he has never changed! I’ll never understand why Jose is so devotional to him when he doesn’t even appreciate all she has done, if anyone doesn’t know what a debt of gratitude is, it would be him…’

‘His rage came out in his confusion’ Kim nodded. ‘ Things will be bad if he continues like this…’

‘Oh he’s bad…’ he agreed. ’I don’t think Josie would want him for a husband anymore, she was murmuring about divorce even as they tended to her…’

Kim stared back at him.

‘No, they can’t…’ she found herself saying.

‘What?’ Peter glanced back. ‘Kimberley, what are you saying?’

‘Kids are not blind Peter..’ Kim replied. ‘They can’t divorce, not now at least, the emotional well-being of the children must be considered, Vanessa talked to me a while ago, she is terrified her parents were fighting because of her, and if they do that it will reinforce that belief..’

‘And Vanessa will blame herself…’ Peter finished slowly. ‘The past will catch up with him, he will have to fight himself if he ever considers going near her again…’

“We can take care of them. But the only way to heal their wounds is to make them work through this as a family. They have to learn that the only balm to suffering is forgiveness. At least Josie made…good memories for him”



~



The cold shell of a house loomed before Peters, far from the home had been before, devoid of any warmly lit windows or roaring fires. Confronting him would be difficult, as Peter knew Josie’s husband wasn’t one to sit quietly during a confrontation, and after the skirmish he was unsure of how Matthew would receive him. Praying he would not be kicked out of the premises, he knocked on the front door, but he had to do this for an old friend, for Jose.

The door opened ajar.

Matthews dark eyes narrowed sharply at him.

‘Peter’

Peter nodded curtly back at him. ‘Matthew’

‘Why are you here?’ he replied coldly.

‘I came to speak’ Peter answered casually. ‘So may I come in?’

The door swung open after several seconds, Peter stepped cautiously through, at least Matthew was cooperative for once, but he readied himself for attack any second, Matthew was of stronger build than Peter was, but right now Matthew was a defeated man, and Peter rose over him because of that.

It was almost darkness, he followed Matthew into the kitchen. Where candles dimly lit the room over the table where Peter realised he had interrupted his meal.

‘Why don’t you turn on the lights?’ Peter asked.

‘Forgot the Bill’ grunted Matthew. ‘So what do you want with me Peter?’

‘What happened’ answered Peter simply, fist slightly clenched on the table.

Matthew didn’t say anything yet continued to eat slowly. Peters muscles relaxed slightly and now at glanced him with thoughtful eyes. Neither held common courtesy for one another but Josies marriage to the bloke had made them develop something like a deep, unexpected brotherhood, and they did tend to fling insults carelessly at one another which resulted in little skirmishes. But now, this was not a skirmish but a deep and troublesome situation and if Matthew could not show remorse, then their was a fat chance of him ever being reunited with Josie.

‘Well, how long have you known?’ Matthew asked finally, breaking uneasy silence. ‘About all this?’

Peters eyes flickered up and noticed the dark thin shade under his eyes, a sign that the man had suffered a great deal over his loss, so perhaps he did feel remorse and resent that he had lashed out. Even though it was horrible to occur, perhaps Peter was a little glad that it had happened, it might’ve given a wake-up to the couple.

‘Only since that night’ answered Peter calmly. ‘She kept it from me, but she was desperate to ask for help after, I think because she was scared of my reaction…and yours’

He ended the sentence with a sharp, slightly angered edge, watching as the mans eyebrows creased ever so slightly which Peter studied closely, was it in pain? Anger? Frustration?

‘She lied to me’ he still answered, fingers laid tightly over one another in a tight ball.

‘She had good intentions…’

‘She persuaded all of you to this lie!’

‘We understood…’

‘It was private…’

‘And that’s why we didn’t know!’ said Peter, daring to raise his voice.

‘Why are you feeling so sorry for her?’ snapped Matthew, skin turning white as he gripped both his hands. ‘Our problems were ours, we could’ve talked it over and solved this as a couple…’

‘and that’s just it…’ finished Peter calmly. ‘Because of you’re insomnia you were in no condition to understand, and even I know you well enough Matthew, not the sort to talk it over, you’re the type of person that lets your hands do the talking…’

‘I…’ began Matthew sharply, but could think of no comeback, he slunk down like a weary old dog, defeated. ‘You’re right, I was too wrapped up in myself, I took it out on her, blinded…’

Peter crossed his arms.

‘You’re right, you were blind’ he answered dryly.

Matthew still had the pride to glare, but stooped his head to talk.

‘I took out all my past, all my frustrations out on her, and she took all my blows without a single compliant’ here his brow knotted in pain. ‘She waited until I would stop, it was my mistake, not hers, why does she make such an effort…?’

‘She loves you’ answered Peter firmly. ‘But even after you married you were still wrapped in your own world, still in your dark past, Josie wanted to bring you out of that darkness…even though it hasn’t worked so far’

‘It was, my fault’ answered Matthew, Peter noticed his voice started to tremble. ‘Shes a good women and a thoughtful wife, the better half of our marriage…’

Peter nodded slowly, he could see sincerity within Matthews face, relief washed over him, relief that Matthew would finally admit his feelings. No longer was he the proud pillar structuring the home. He had spent the three present days alone wandering the confines of his house, alternatively worrying feverishly about his wife and child.

‘I don’t know what’s going to happen now’ he gritted, a slight trace of fear in his voice. ‘My reputation in ruins, my wife in danger, my child taken from me. What am I going to do?’

Peter couldn’t help but feel the slightest pity for Matthew, as a man Matthew had failed miserably, losing everything just because he couldn’t crawl from the pit, stubborn to the fact no one could understand him, Josie nothing but a scapegoat, with years of cruel words and blame towards her that had finally escalated into her becoming a punching bag.

‘Work hard to regain your respect’ answered Peter finally. ‘You’re a good man, you know what to do, you have to try’