Trust

“You must trust me! It’s the truth! Do you believe me?”

This is the first time I hear it from her: “ believe me”…to believe…there is no reason to believe, there are the facts that speak against it. Trust? Away it goes, like smoke carried by the wistful wind. The truth – what is it, or better said, whose truth?

There is my truth, her truth, their truth, the common sense truth…so many others, with each and every space, time and conscience a different truth. My mind concocts retrospective scenarios about hidden truths. Like the phone call at 3 a.m. in the morning – from her brother; or the business dinner she had to attend – huge contract to be signed; or the embraces and the whispers – I love you….All this is the Truth? You want me to simply believe it?!...
It‘s like a fog coming down the mountain into the sleepy valley, covering even the sharpest lines. My memories have become dim, covered in foggy lies. My breath struggles to keep up with the scarce air, my muscles feel the urge to move in an apocalyptic motion.  Only my eyes give away. It is like bleeding from a wound and not knowing when it will stop, if ever…I gasp for some air, the body violently claiming its rights.

Then I see – no!
It cannot be!
I won’t believe it!