Lucy

        “Good morning, honey,” Megan whispered into her husband’s ear.  He grumbled a muffled reply and pulled his pillow over his face, making her laugh.  She climbed off the bed and, relinquishing the damp towel from around her waist, put on a bright orange linen blouse and a pair of khaki shorts.  Today was her daughter’s second birthday and it was the first time since moving back home that their whole family would be together at the same time.  Hopefully, by day’s end, her little child would forget the past and be happy for once.  As Megan finished dressing, she tiptoed over to the bed and quickly yanked the covers off, exposing Jordan’s legs to the chilly morning air.  The effect was immediate, and he jumped up in surprise.

         Jordan pretended to wrestle back the covers from her, but Megan stood adamant.  “Please,” he pleaded, sticking out his lower lip.  This only made her laugh, and she guided him to the bathroom, insisting he get ready and get downstairs as quickly as he could.

         “Daisy will be up soon and we need to be ready for her.  I’m going down to fix breakfast, so hurry, okay?”  Before he could answer, she shut the door and made her way downstairs.

         It wasn’t long before the aroma of bacon and pancakes filled the entire house, beckoning the children to come eat.  Gavin was the first to arrive in the kitchen, his nose leading the way since the rest of his body was still half asleep.  Megan laid his plate out before him.  It consisted of a fluffy pancake and three strips of bacon, enough to satisfy his growing six-year old body.  He’d only taken one bite before both his sisters entered the room; Daisy being guided slowly by Anna’s hand.  Anna helped her little sister into a chair before crossing the room and enveloping her mother in a hug.

         Though Anna was only eight years old, she was unusually perceptive to emotions, especially those circulating around the Hensley household at this time.  She understood how hard her parents worked to give Daisy a pleasant, normal life.  Therefore, she often tried her hardest to make sure that her mother knew how much she was loved and appreciated.  Otherwise, Anna figured that her mom would go crazy.  The shower turned off upstairs.  She knew her dad would be down in a minute, and she was right.

         Jordan bounded down the stairs and, using the kitchen’s slick textured linoleum to his advantage, skidded to a halt directly in front of Daisy.  “Happy birthday baby girl!  Are you ready for the greatest day ever?”  Daisy just blinked.  He leaned in and kissed her on the forehead, “You know you want to smile.”

         Daisy still didn’t smile, but she wasn’t frowning either.  She might’ve looked angry with the thin line drawn across her lips, but she was emotionless.  Her pale blue eyes stared blankly back at her father, seemingly studying him while her jaws clenched tight and she swallowed hard. 

         “Are you hungry, Dad?  Mom made awesome pancakes!”

         “That’s alright, Gavin; I’m not really hungry this morning.”  Jordan made his way to Megan who was on the other side of the kitchen cleaning the pans that had previously harbored the kid’s breakfast.  He snuck up behind her, placed his hands on her hips, and kissed her neck.  She closed her eyes and sighed.

         “I don’t know what we can do Jordan.  She still isn’t getting any better and today’s her second birthday.  You’d think she would at least smile on a day like today.”

         “Hey now, remember what the doctor said.  She’s going to live an extremely rough life, but hopefully she’ll come to understand it in time, especially after we give her the present you picked out.  You picked up the stuffed animal right?” Jordan asked.  Megan widened her eyes and turned around quickly.  “I’m kidding!  I got the present, but they were out of the animals so I got her something else.”

         Megan laughed, “Well, I hope it makes her happy because we seem to be doing a bad job at it ourselves.”

         Jordan lifted a finger and pressed it to her lips, “Hush, we’re doing everything we can.  Don’t put so much pressure on yourself, just take it in stride.”

         The clatter of silverware behind them signaled the end of breakfast, so Jordan hurried upstairs to retrieve the gift that he had hidden under the bed.  Since he was not very skilled at wrapping presents, he had stuffed the gift into a shopping bag and covered it with packing peanuts.  He knew Daisy wouldn’t mind, but just to make sure it looked pretty for everyone else, he had slapped a shiny purple bow to the brown exterior of the bag.  He took the present downstairs and handed it to his wife who gave him a questioning glance when she noticed the paper sack.  Jordan just smiled.

         “Daisy, come over here and open your birthday present.  You’re going to love this so much,” Megan exclaimed putting great emphasis on the word love, as if trying to pound the word deep into the little girl’s mind, insisting she understand its meaning.  Daisy blindly followed the sound of her mother’s soothing voice, slowly but surely crossing the soft carpet.  She walked unhurriedly, without the bounce in her step that any other two-year old would demonstrate. 

         The other children just watched with smiles on their faces, though Anna’s was forced.  Anna understood the complications that Daisy produced better than Gavin did, for he thought simple-mindedly.  Although Gavin knew Daisy was blind, he didn’t quite realize the seriousness behind her mental conditions and only thought that she was an unhappy child.

         When Daisy reached her mom, she sat down on the floor and crossed her arms over her chest.  She waited for her gift to be handed to her, and even when it was, she seemed to toy with the idea of opening it.  Megan locked eyes with Jordan and tried to force a smile, but neither of them was cheerful on this day which should have been a joyous occasion.

         After a few minutes of fingering the packing peanuts and pulling them out in handfuls, Daisy allowed her hand to investigate the remaining contents of the bag.  Even as her hand brushed the doll, she remained expressionless, gazing directly ahead with her unmoving eyes.  She hefted the doll out of the bag and placed it on the ground in front of her.  Running her hands over its plastic to take in all of the features, her fingers especially lingered on the doll’s long dark hair, kneading every lock between her digits.

         “Do you like it?” Megan asked, her voice quivery.  “Please tell me you like it…” she trailed off.

         “Yes, I do.  Whose is it?”  Daisy responded flatly.  These words brought tears to the corners of Jordan’s eyes as he seldom heard her speak, and even when he did, the words were never so positive.

         “We got her in town, just for you.  She’s yours now.”  Daisy seemed satisfied with this answer.  “You can show her to Grandma and Grandpa when they come.  I bet they’ll be jealous that you got such a pretty doll.”  The rest of the morning passed quickly as they waited for the guests to come.  Megan had invited Daisy’s grandparents and both of Jordan’s brothers’ families.  Both the brothers had kids around Daisy’s age that they would bring.  Megan was excited for the prospect of Daisy becoming friends with some of the kids.  Eventually, the doorbell rang and the relatives arrived one by one, each greeting Daisy with a cheerful hugs and kisses.  They made their way to the backyard and Jordan fired up the grill.

         While the kids went off playing in the yard, the adults remained around the deck sipping drinks and chatting.  The majority of the discussion was centered on Daisy, her conditions, and what was being done to overcome then.  As painstakingly difficult as it was for Jordan and Megan to discuss the disorders of their youngest daughter, they felt it was necessary to keep the whole family up to date.  The grandparents were the most sympathetic, merely nodding in solemn agreement over every choice made by the parents.  Robert, however, was much blunter in asking all types of questions.  Because he had been overseas in the Peace Corps, he hadn’t been accurately filled in with everything that happened.

         “What did the doctor say exactly?  Word for word.  They could have been beating around the bush, you know that right?  Doctors will do that to you, they’ll milk you for all your worth ‘cause they know you will…”

         “Robert!”  Megan interrupted.  “The doctors know more than we do and we have no reason to doubt them.”

         “Just tell me again what they said,” Robert demanded.  He was stubborn in his approach.

         Megan sighed and rubbed her face, cueing Jordan to take control.  “They said she has Schizoid Personality Disorder and possibly Anhedonia,” Jordan answered.  “They ran all kinds of tests, and they’re the only disorders they can really compare her symptoms to.”

         “Oh yeah, and hey Robert, she’s blind too,” Megan interrupted mockingly.  “Should we go get a second opinion on that one?  Maybe you could go look in her eyes and tell me what you think.”

         Robert looked apologetic for a moment, but then turned to question Jordan once again.  “Will you just tell me how the doctors know she has this schizoid thing?”

         “Well, she’s always withdrawn, even from her own family, and she’s also aloof,” Jordan responded while motioning to the kids who were running around in the green grass.  Daisy was missing from the game of tag that all her cousins were participating in.  It wasn’t her age that set her apart from the rest of the group.  She had cousins her age that merely waddled in circles at the prospect of being included in such a fun event.  Instead, Daisy sat apart from the other children, clear across the yard and under the swing set, and held her doll.  At times, when a scream erupted from the throat of an excited boy or girl, she snapped her head instinctively towards the noise, tilting her face much like a curious dog would.  Had the parents been keeping a close eye on her, they would have noticed this strange nature, as it wasn’t normal.  No two year old should dismiss themselves so quickly from the world that they are immune to emotional and physical contact, and then quickly embrace the slightest call of distress.

         Robert kept the bitter conversation flowing by asking a barrage of questions which seemed to only satisfy his needs and help him create his own conjectures.  “What’s this Anhedonia issue?”

          “Daisy doesn’t seem to enjoy anything in life, including her family,” Jordan continually answered his probing questions so as not to create a rift for the rest of the day.  “Don’t get me wrong, she doesn’t hate us, she just never smiles or anything.  That’s why the doctors say she has this disorder.  They told us, if she doesn’t experience any pleasure from life, she most likely has Anhedonia.  Also, they believe her anterior caudate is smaller than a normal person’s is.”

         All of the adults but Megan looked confused and so Jordan simplified his answer.  “The part of her brain in which pleasures are processed is smaller than normal, meaning she might not be experiencing pleasure at all.”

         Katie butted in softly, “But what about that doll?  Ever since we got here she hasn’t let it out of her hands.  I know it’s a new present, but look,” she said nodding her head towards the child beneath the swing set, “it looks like she’s enjoying it to me.”  Daisy’s fingers were caressing the plastic toy and it did seem as if she enjoyed the doll.  The adults then watched as she lifted the doll into the air so that their faces were parallel.  She then turned her head and brought the doll’s face to her ear.  After seemingly listening to the doll for a few seconds, she switched roles and placed her own lips at the doll’s ears and began to speak.

         Grandma emitted an almost inaudible gasp and quickly covered her mouth after receiving a stern glare from Megan.  “Megan, that’s…” she hesitated.

         “That’s creepy is what it is,” stammered Robert finishing her sentence.  “That kid ain’t normal.”  As soon as the words left his mouth, he regretted it.  Tears flowed from Megan’s eyes but she didn’t care.  He tried to utter an apology but was instead greeted by a hard slap to the face.  Jordan jumped up and grabbed Megan, trying to calm her down, but she shoved him away and ran across the yard to where her little girl sat still conversing with her doll.

         “Daisy, come here; come with Mommy.”  Megan scooped up Daisy and the doll in one armful and headed for the house.  She ignored the uncomfortable stares of her relatives and swept past them, telling Jordan to leave her be.  She walked up the porch steps and threw open the sliding door.  Not bothering to close it, she ascended the steps to her bedroom and shut the door behind her.  Megan sat Daisy on the bed and lay face down beside her sobbing.  All she could think about was how much of an insensitive jerk Robert was. 

         A soft sound trickled through the air, almost unheard, but it caused Megan’s hair to stand on end.  She held her breath and waited, wondering if she had imagined it.  It came again, no louder than the first time, but this time Megan heard it clearly.  It sounded like a giggle.  Megan flipped onto her back and turned to look at Daisy who was already sitting cross-legged staring right back at her.  The noise had to have come from the girl but Daisy’s lips remained sealed shut.

         “Was that you?”  Megan sat up next to her daughter, “Did you laugh?”  She received no answer.  Daisy sat motionless, expressionless, staring.  In her lap, the doll rested, its midnight colored eyes fixed on Megan as well.

         Megan asked one more time, “Daisy, was that you?”  No answer.  Maybe her daughter was weird, just like Robert said.  No, Daisy was her baby girl.  Plenty of people have mental conditions; it’s almost natural to be unnatural.  Megan lifted a hand and stroked Daisy’s cheek.  “How’s your birthday going?  Are you having fun?”

         This time, Daisy answered.  “Yeah, I like my dolly.”

         “What’s her name?” Megan asked.

         “Lucy.”

         Megan smiled.  She had half expected the doll’s name to be murderous sounding or the name of a famous serial killer, but she realized that was dumb because Daisy was only two years old and would never have even heard of any killers.  “That’s a pretty name.  Why did you name her that?”

         Daisy blinked and shrugged her shoulders.  “She told me her name.”  The back of Megan’s neck prickled.

         “I see.  Well, do you guys talk a lot?  What else has she told you?”

         “She tells me lots of things.  She’s nice,” Daisy responded while running her hand across Lucy’s face.  This is normal for kids, Megan thought.  All kinds of kids have imaginary friends and talk to them so what’s wrong with Daisy talking to Lucy.

         “Well how about you ask Lucy if she wants to go back outside to play?”

         Daisy glanced down at her doll as if she could see Lucy sitting in her lap.  “She doesn’t like to talk around other people.  She’s shy.”  A sigh escaped Megan’s lips.  For a little while, she had imagined the doll was actually speaking to her daughter.  She could even see its plastic lips moving, carrying on a conversation with a human being.  But now she realized how foolish that sounded and managed a weak smile.

         “Okay, you can tell Lucy that it’s fine to be shy, but how about we go downstairs and join the party again.  After all, it’s your birthday.”  Megan picked up her daughter, who clung tight to her doll, and headed back outside.  As she left the house, the first thing she noticed was that Robert was gone and his children were missing.  Megan headed over to the small crowd of kids and asked if it was alright that Daisy played with them.  The kids, following Anna’s example, agreed and instantly swarmed around Daisy to ask her about her doll.  Since only Markus’ kids remained at the party with her own, it was a small group that wasn’t very vocal.  Both of Markus’ kids were young, ages three and five, so Megan hoped that Daisy would try to interact with them.

         She returned to the adults and pulled Jordan away, asking to see him in private.  “Did Robert go home?”  Jordan nodded.  “Did he leave because of me?  I messed up, didn’t I?”

         Jordan stifled a laugh.  “You’re fine.  He left because he felt bad about what he did.  He even said so.  He told me he acted like a jerk and to tell you he was sorry.”  These words relaxed Megan a little, and she decided to rejoin the adults and engage in their conversations.  Even though Robert and Katie had left, the grandparents and Markus had all stayed.  Megan acted pleasant the rest of the day because there were no high tensions now that Robert was gone.  The discussions faded away from Daisy and latched onto other issues such as the war in Iraq, the newly elected president, and various others.  As the day neared an end and the sun lowered in the west, the relatives decided it was best for them to get back home.

         That night, Anna and Gavin excitedly talked about their day and how much fun they had playing with the other kids.  Though they sat around Daisy, she did not partake in their conversation.  Instead, she sat there stroking Lucy’s hair, her pale blue eyes wandering the room, gazing at the colorful atmosphere that she couldn’t see.  Megan watched this and she couldn’t keep her mind from thinking ugly thoughts about how different her child was and if she would ever belong in society.

         Jordan came into the room clapping his hands and telling everyone how late it was.  Though he was met with groans from the kids, he ushered them to their rooms.  Megan carried Daisy to her room which was directly across from Gavin’s.  As she tucked the little girl beneath the covers, Daisy suddenly asked a disturbing question.

         “Why doesn’t Lucy like you?”

         Megan widened her eyes.  “What?” she asked.

         Daisy kept going.  “Lucy told me today.  She says you’re evil and you hate me because I was made wrong.”

         Megan quickly put her hand to Daisy’s cheek.  “You think I hate you because you’re different?  That’s not true Daisy.”  Megan leaned in close to whisper in her ear.  “Don’t tell the other kids, but I love you the most because of it.”  Megan also winked before realizing it was a pointless motion.

         “Why do you lie Mommy?”  Megan’s mouth opened wide.  “Lucy says you do it all the time.”

         “Daisy, listen to me.  Who told you this?  Were some of the other kids being mean to you?”  Megan asked quickly.  Her daughter was scaring her with the absurd ideas that her doll was telling her how bad of a mother she had.

         Daisy cocked her head and smiled.  “No Mommy, it was Lucy.  The other kids don’t like me either.  They talk about me; Lucy says so.”

         “Alright, that’s enough.  That isn’t true Daisy.  No one talks bad about you, and no one hates you.  Maybe I should take this doll out of your bed if she’s telling you these things.”

         “Don’t,” Daisy growled.  Megan’s blood ran cold and her breath came fast.  She glanced at the doll lying next to Daisy on the bed.  Its eyes were still open, still black, and still staring right at her.  Megan shook her head, this is ridiculous.  I’m not scared of my two year old daughter and her doll.

         “Okay, we’ll talk about this in the morning Daisy.  I love you so much.”  Megan backed out of the room as both pairs of eyes seemingly followed her.  Allowing the nightlight by Daisy’s bed to keep the shadows at bay, more for show than security, she flipped off the light and shut the door.

         Megan opened up the other kid’s doors and whispered her goodnights to them.  Jordan had already put them to bed and was apparently upstairs waiting for Megan to join him.  She did so, and even as she climbed into bed, she couldn’t shake the eerie feeling that ran through her body.  She lay there in her husband’s arms, but still she shuddered constantly.  Her daughter had threatened her with that one syllable word.  It wasn’t a plea to let the doll stay by her side; it was a demand, a menacing demand from her two year old child.

         Megan slowly relaxed by telling herself she had probably imagined the whole incident.  She was exhausted from the tiresome events of the day, what with Robert bringing out the worst in her and her daughter’s inability to mingle.  She eventually fell asleep but was quickly haunted by horrifying dreams of her baby girl screaming in the arms of a blood thirsty doll.  It was Lucy that was holding Daisy captive, a knife to her throat, cackling gleefully as Megan looked on, powerless to save her baby.  Daisy’s screams rang loudly in her ears, so loud she was forced to cover her ears and close her eyes.  The screaming grew louder until it was unbearable.  Still, it intensified, shrill and penetrating, the noise shook Megan and dropped her to her knees. 

         She gritted her teeth and forced her eyes open, she had to fight back, but the doll was gone.  She was lying in her bed again, beads of sweat glistening on her skin from the yard light penetrating her bedroom through the windows.  She could still hear Daisy’s deafening screams in her head and no matter how hard she clamped her hands to her ears, she could not block them out. 

         At once, she realized that the piercing noise was not in her head, but from the first floor of the house.  For the first time she glanced over to where Jordan should have been, but his matted impression in the bed sheets was the only trace of him.  Daisy must be having nightmares and Jordan’s down there consoling her right now, Megan thought, trying to trick her mind.  Still, she could not shake the lingering dream from her mind and it swam in front of her eyes – Lucy gone mad.  No, I’m the one who’s going mad.  Megan climbed out of bed on shaky knees, descended the stairs, and crept through the dark to Daisy’s door.  The high pitched screams stopped as she flipped on the light switch and whispered to Daisy, trying to quiet her.

         “Mommy,” she stammered.  Megan’s eyes grew wide as her eyes swept the floor.  Jordan laid face up unmoving, his mouth open in a silent scream and his eyes wide with fright.  His shredded shirt was soaked in fresh blood but no weapon lay around him.  Any sane person would have believed there was a murderer in the house, a sick twisted human being.  Megan knew this was not the case, and when she looked to the bed, she did not see what she feared most.  Lucy was not holding a hostage in her arms, had no knife to Daisy’s throat.  In fact, Lucy was not on the bed at all.  Megan moved quickly to her daughter before realizing her mistake.  The door slammed behind her and the lights were cut.  She launched herself onto the bed, ignoring the pain shooting through her knee as it collided with the wooden frame. 

         Daisy’s night light was still illuminating a small portion of the room, and in its glow, Lucy walked towards the bed.

         “Lucy wants to be with me forever.  She said so,” Daisy cried.  The doll just grinned, its dark eyes penetrating deep into Megan’s soul.  It climbed up the foot of the bed and crept closer to Megan.  From behind its back it pulled a butcher knife, dripping with Jordan’s blood, and pointed it at her.

         “Forever,” Lucy repeated and lunged at Megan, piercing her chest with the bloodied end of the knife.  From a distance, Megan heard Daisy’s screams, her pleas for her mother, and her cries for help.  Though Megan loved Daisy and wanted to protect her, the doll’s countless stabs into her body prevented her from mustering the strength to ward off the evil creature.  As Megan’s eyes closed and her body grew limp, she felt Lucy crawl towards her head and amidst its gleeful laughter, utter one last vile word, “Forever.”