The Monster Sandwich

All day I sat at my desk thinking about the sign I saw in the restaurant window while I was walking to school.

...The Home of the Monster Sandwich

it said in big green, scary looking letters and I wondered what it could mean.

All day I sat at my desk not hearing the teacher when she asked me if I didn’t feel well and that maybe I’d like to go to see the nurse. All day I sat there not hearing her ask me if I was sleeping or if I had been hypnotized or if I had been kidnapped by aliens and a copy of me had been left sitting there in my place not doing anything at all except just staring at my belly button.                                     

But I didn’t hear her. All I did was sit there thinking and wondering and puzzling and then thinking some more. What is a monster sandwich? What ever could it be? Is it a sandwich for monsters to eat… or is it a sandwich that would want to eat me?

Now if it is a sandwich for monsters to eat, then what kind of things would monsters like on a sandwich?

Would it be full of mushy green stuff and old eyeballs that squished out the sides and looked around when they picked it up?

Did nasty things slide down the monsters’ arms and drip off their elbows while they ate it?

Or is it a sandwich made out of monsters and all covered with catsup and mustard and a pickle?

And what kind of bread would you use to make a monster sandwich?

Would a monster sandwich come with french fries or maybe a salad? Does it come with a big bowl of hot soup? What kind of soup would you get with a monster sandwich?

Would it be a sandwich with big, scary eyes that look at you while you’re looking at it?

Would it have great big teeth that bite your lip when you try to eat it?

Maybe it has big hairy arms and legs and walks all around saying BOO! and scaring people.

Perhaps it has a big loud voice and sits on the plate yelling at you if you try to eat it with a fork and knife.

What is it? Whatever could it be?

And where does a monster sandwich live?

Does it live in a dented old lunch box next to an old half smooshed banana and some broken cookies?

Does it live in an old, scary looking house with broken windows and a broken door?

Are there bats flying around it and does it have spooky noises coming out of it all the time and does it have lightning flashing around it, too?

Or does it live in a beautiful castle and wear fancy clothes?

Or maybe it lives in a cute little white cottage with green shutters on the windows and pink and purple flowers in the garden out front and does it have a white picket fence?

Whatever could it be? Is it a sandwich for monsters to eat… or is it a sandwich that would want to eat me?