14/7/1 chapter 3

The woman entered the bedroom to see her husband in bed with a spool of string tied to his toe. She smiled and thought to herself that this would be a great time to introduce their new cat to him. Her method of awaking him was screaming bloody murder just because, why not?
"STAN, HURRY, WAKE UP, THERE'S A CAT IN THE HOUSE!" Stan woke bolt upright with a confused horror stricken face, not for a fear of cats but the screaming had definitely done it.
The string he had tied to his toe had cut off the circulation and was purple and hurt like the dickens. Putting weight on it while trying to put his shirt on doubled him over, smashing his head on the dresser in front of the bed. Recoiling rapidly, flinging himself back on the bed hollering "Eileen what the blazes are you yelling about a cat? Why does my toe hurt? Why does my head hurt? Why am I yelling?" Still panicked and with the adrenaline now flowing strong, his toe forgotten, he was now of a mind to shoo a cat and was running through the bedroom door not listening to what eileen was saying.
In the living room the dog, Willy, had made fast friends with their new pet. Still unknown to Stan who believed the task was rid the house of an unwanted visitor he was being loud and moving quickly flailing his arms about and screaming gibberish to no one. This did nothing but engage Willys' desire to protect his new friend who by now was fleeing the scene of the raging madman.
In the kitchen was a beautiful three tier cake from Eileens bakery that a customer did not pick up or cancel therefore, free cake. Stan, in hot pursuit of the cat, towing spool of string with Willy scrambling after him on tiled floor causing an equal amount of ruckus of his own sliding, slipping, crashing and barking his fool head off. They circled the kitchen a few time wrapping table, chairs and legs human and canine alike in a tightening circle of string. The cat leapt from sliding chair to table top pausing for footing and turning to the fridge eyeing it up quickly and jumped again.
That's when stan lunged for the cat trying to pluck it from the air. Between Willy and string and a very disheveled kitchen the fall was in this action, coming up short of the target due to those dangers Stan slipped more than leapt and stretching out a now windmilling arm for purchase on anything, he struck table up ending it while its leg broke on his impact sending the three layers of cake on a one way trip to the man now splayed out on the floor. SPLAT SPLAT SPLAT with half a second intervals, head, chest and groin were now three zones of cake on stans body.
Standing at the kitchen door now was Eileen, red faced and crying with laughter pointing at the CAT, who now sat atop the fridge like nothing was amiss.

Word count 515