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I think I'm lost in the depth of my imagination. A lifeless feeling that engulfs me with all of its complexity while making my mind cry out a pain that I never wish upon anyone. There's a hovering belief perpetual lingering deep inside my head. My mind is dark, as dark as the devils thoughts. I need to shake out the dreams which are really nightmares ruling my slumber. Here I am, I know where I stand but, unfortunately I'm still lost. Places of the familiar pass at different paces; they become a blurred concept of things familiar. I'm going to end up uncertain again, dragging behind my safety zone, scratched off the list which society proclaims to be "the sane." It's a losing battlefield I stagger on; assurance fights the undefeatable battle against the ugly truth of deception. I feel the need to carry on, too be stronger than my usual self. I'm not as empty as I feel right now; I'm not as empty as I feel.

Over the weekend I felt happy. It was pleasant listening to the birds sing despite the winter's cold. Then the birds flew south along with my overflowing sunshine. It's strange and unfair how emotions can become untamable. One minute you feel untouchable, the next you have a war zone racing through your head. All I can do is breathe and focus on the beauty which surrounds me, which is everywhere. But, some days it's not easy overlooking the gloom stalking over me as if I'm some kind of prey. Today has little life in it, I feel shallow and small because I'm overlooking its magnificence and taking it for granted. Usually, I can find a smile in everything, even evil but, not today, this day is different. Uncomfortable bends in the road leave me stranded on this deserted road. I know this is a phase, a short burst of grey skies and empty hopes. I know that I will find my optimistic self which lived before this unwanted pessimist. He is in there, prying his way out.