The way I felt yesterday

I don't know what happened yesterday, but I really felt Terrible. My mood just turned from bad to worse. I just woke up and there I was, in a horrible, horrible mood. I was mad at Patrick- really mad. I refused to get up and get dressed. The whole day I was in my pjs. I felt so alone and so hopeless. I cried and I cried. My ten year old made me feel so worth while, he made me smile =0). I mean one must understand, I have so much going against me right now that I don't see no way out. I have no Job, the rent is up there and we barely have food in the fridge. What can I do? There's times that I don't want to get up. I pray that that every day feels different. I don't want to take it out on people,so I refuse or decline my phone calls. The time right now is 2:18am and I am still awake. What I would give to smoke a Newport right now, but guess what? I have no money! That sucks! Boogie has half day tomorrow, that means I won't be able to sleep til two o'clock. Well, Im gonna go now. Until next time.