Character Interview: Cupid

Character Interview

Editor, Aneeda Decision, who works for a large publisher aka ‘Scatter House Publishing’ has decided the best way to find a good story is to interview the main character of a book. This helps her to decide if they should publish the story or not. Unfortunately, for the author’s the characters are not always the most well behaved; sometimes they could care less about the story or the author’s interests. However, Aneeda has never been wrong about the stories that she chooses to publish.

The following is the transcription of her interview with Cupid, from the story Cupid and Bethany.

Aneeda: Good Morning, My name is Aneeda Decision. Would you like anything to drink before we start?

Cupid: It’s nice to meet you. Ms Decision, I would love a bottle of water.

Aneeda: Please call me Aneeda. You are Cupid.

Cupid: Yes, Why were you expecting a baby in a diaper with a bow and arrow?

Aneeda: Well, I was not sure what to expect. {Speaking into the phone, she request the water for him} Could you please describe yourself? Pretend that I am blind.
{The secretary enters and brings Aneeda coffee and a bottle of water.}

Cupid: I am 5’9 185lbs, brown hair with blond and silver streaks, my eyes color is by birth silver though I can change it at will to any color I choose. I have a build of an athlete long and lean. I have four wings, which I can choose to show or not. They are the wings of a dragonfly not feathered.

Aneeda: { Yawns }

Cupid: {Seeing she is not really paying attention, he shifts gears just a little bit.} I know that you’re not married, currently without a significant other and wish deeply that you could find that special person… I wear tie-dyed boxers and...

Aneeda: Ok, that’s enough, and what do you mean you know I’m single?

Cupid: You don’t believe I am who I said I am.

Aneeda: Your name is really Cupid? What do you think of that?

Cupid: Yes, unfortunately, my mother thought it was a ‘cute’ name. I am stuck with it, or at least that is what most people call me, when I let them know my name.

Aneeda: What are you exactly and can you prove that you are who you say you are besides the whole analyzing Aneeda thing?

Cupid: Well, You would probably call me an elf, some called me a god, and most of them have no idea that I am not a human.

As far as proving it, well if I didn’t like the writer, I would leave and let you stew. Part of being who I am is I know everything about your past loves and the love’s of everyone else in this building. I suppose you want to see the bow and arrow as proof. Well, that’s not happening, those are not coming out unless I have to use them. I could show you my wings; however, you would think it was an optical illusion, even if you touched them and you were looking for Angle wings anyhow, so you would just gawk at my real wings.

Aneeda: Ok, I think we might have gotten off on the wrong foot here. You’re right you are not exactly what I was expecting. Can you explain why the Cupid Mythology shows a baby in a diaper with feathered wings?

Cupid: You know I really hate my image. When I was a child, my mother thought it would be ‘cute’ if I looked like a little angle and went about the mortal realm with my bow and arrow. I was to allow humans to catch glimpses of me in action. Mother was never far away and she just loved, the fact that her, little boy was becoming famous in the mortal realm, because to be famous to mortal’s is to be known among my kind. {He slowly takes a drink of his water, watching her as he does. He re-caps the bottle noticing her studying him.} If you do not wish for me to analyze you, then you should stop trying to imagine me in nothing but a loosely wrapped diaper.

Aneeda: {blushing deeply clears her throat.} Moving on… Can you tell me about your favorite parts of Cupid and Bethany?

Cupid: That would be finding out that Cupid is just my ‘Use name’. Oh shoot, I guess the big fight where Kera’s and I get to finish off our foes is good too.

Aneeda: What would be your least favorite part of the book and why?

Cupid: Tripping and falling when I met Bethany. I mean very rarely does someone catch me by surprise .

Aneeda: Could you tell me what is your relationship with Bethany?

Cupid: Bethany is amazing, strong, stubborn, quick witted and independent. I’m not sure, where it’s going. If I didn’t know exactly where my arrows were I would think someone was trying to use one on me. I feel a spark though I don’t exactly know for sure. It’s not like it was with Persephone OF WHICH I AM –SO GLAD. I was really too young then. Of course, Bethany is not exactly mortal so it would make a more appropriate match. {He sees her eyeing him with that disbelieving look}

Ok, fine – do you need to see me in my “Cupid Image” to believe?

{He quickly stands moves to the desk jumps in the air. Hovering above Aneeda’s desk is the diaper wearing angle winged baby. He reaches down and pinches her arm.}

Aneeda: Ouch, why did you do that?

{Cupid, already himself again is sitting back down.}

Cupid: Because you were thinking about throwing the book in the trash as some hyped up romance novel, which proves that you have not read the book. You were also thinking of calling security and having them escort me from the building and recommending that I be committed to a ‘loony bin’.
Now you’re confused and cannot figure out what to do. You really want to see my bow and arrow.

Aneeda: You’re right that is what I was thinking. However, mind reading is a common trait among fantasy and Science fiction characters. I can tell you I felt the pinch, my arm is still red. You even left a white feather behind. How did you do that?

Cupid: It is a part of who I am, as much as I wish it were not. Losing a feather is like a hair falling out, not really a big deal.

Aneeda: Ok, so let’s say I do believe who you are for a minute. Why won’t you show me the bow and arrow?

Cupid: Number one, they are dangerous. Number two; this could be an elaborate trap to take them from me. In addition, number three, you are becoming a little too obsessive.

Aneeda: Ok, I get it you’re not comfortable with showing them to me. What is your favorite food?

Cupid: Really? My favorite food? Um, let’s see in the human world it would probably be pizza. At home well, that would be a fruit that only grows there, called a ‘neovarap’.

Anneda: Do you think you’re handsome?

Cupid: Wow, you really ask this question. So, If I say no, then I have low self-esteem and if I say yes then I am stuck on myself. So, how about I answer it this way. I have heard what you think of me in your thoughts.

Aneeda: Do you always wear glamour when you’re in the human realm and what do you look like without your glamour?

Cupid: I look exactly as I explained before, with wings of a dragonfly that connect to my back just below my shoulder blades in the center of my back. My face is slightly more angular than it appears right now and I have a few more streaks of shimmering silver in my hair that shines like I have a halo on so I don’t walk around without dimming it down a little bit. And wings tend to draw attention.
Wonderful I can see my image in your mind now… Exactly except I don’t wear an outfit like that ever.

Aneeda: Ok, well I have to wrap up this interview. Just one more question. Your answer about what you are was a little vague. Can you please explain that to me?

Cupid: Well, my kind started out among you as anyone else. We live longer and some thought us gods. It was pleasing to us. We are mortal. We just live longer than humans do. We have always been slightly different because of our life span.

Aneeda: I would like to thank you for coming in for this interview.

Aneeda’s thoughts and summary of the experience: Cupid is good to look at. His knowing my thoughts was a little annoying. I will have to investigate a few other characters before I decide if I want to publish this book. If he were any other god besides Cupid no matter how minor, it would be easier to take him seriously. If I could just stop picturing his eyes or him in a diaper, my day would go by so much quicker!


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