Today

Do you ever feel like everything is happening at once? Like it's all crashing down and all you can do is stand by and watch? That seems to be my state of mind everyday. So lets make a list of all the things crashing right now. First of all my love life is nonexistent. I can't talk to guys if I'm even remotely attracted to them. I finally introduced myself to a cute guy I've had a crush on for like five years ( never talked to him before) and I'm pretty sure I ruined it by giving him my number right away over facebook (I also sent him a message two mins after he walked out of the store. How was I supposed to know he would get it right away?) Well he didn't text me duh . . .

Secondly I need money, like lots of it! Maybe I'll rob a bank? I have to pay my crdit cards off asap plus my parents, pay for contacts and keep up with my monthly bills. I also have to figure out how to pay $6,000 for my teeth. Life sucks. I'm in the middle of maybe getting a new job which means quitting my current job ( I'm terrified to quit!) School starts in one week!!! My first year of college! I'm so excited, but at the same time I don't want to get attached to the school or the people because I'll be leaving. So what do you think? I'm totally screwed up I know. That's life though right? wrong? I don't know!



PART 2 : Work, Boredom & everything else



Boredom is the worst form of torture I think, self-inflicted that is. Even when the store is empty there is always something to do but I would rather sit and do nothing. And I hate when we get customers even though time speeds up when they come in the store. Time has been dead this past few days. I'm thinking it got to be at least six but no it only four. Wonderful. So I'm planning my night in my head and it goes something like this. First leave work at nine then pick up some bedding for my babies at home because they stink! I'm probably gonna give them a bath too. Then I need to go home and grab my tennis shoes and change my clothes and head to the gymn to work out for a little bit. Fun! not lol (I'll work off all the coffee I drank today ugh) and then I'll need to eat something for dinner. My room is once again a disaster but this time because I clean out my closet ha, fun how things work. I need to clean cages and my babies plus vaccumn. I also need to do some laundry (about the only noticable thing about my mom being gone is that my clothes aren't getting washed.) I need to bag all of my old clothes and probably should clean my boots. hmmm so what else. . . . oh so I guess I didn't completely ruin it with the guy. He's still talking to me on facebook so thats good :) on the downside he's moving to colorado ugh well hopefully nobody reads this cuz some people will totally know who i'm talking about but I doubt anybody will so I think thats all I got for today. I know this is starting to get boring but I promise if you keep reading something totally messed up and crazy will happen to me. Seriously . . . . Any minute now.



PART 3: These Things



Do you ever find yourself failling at life? The correct answer is yes. All the time. Sucks doesn't it. Take my amazing plan yesterday. While I did work out (ouch) my room didn't get touched and my animals still stink. Fail. I then forced myself into stayingup till two watching tv before stumbling (without washing my face) into bed. I then slept until twelve thirty with just enough time to get up and get ready before heading to work. Another slow day. I've also agreed to pay for my brother and his girlfriends movie tickets tonight with money I really don't have to spend. Double fail. Life is a fail. A series of disapointments until finally something happens that works out right up until you mess it up. No, I'm not a pessimist, I promise. I'm completely a glass half full person. Thats half the time of course. The other half I'm like die cruel world. Ha can't you totally see me that way? Nope, not at all would be the correct answer.

So there are these things (wasn't that a totally creative way to include my title?!) I wish for, dream about, etc. I'll tell you the most important ones. First would be losing weight or looking sexy not sure if they are the same thing or if one happens because of the other. I'm pretty, certainly not ugly, but on the heavy side. I'm starting to work out (Yahh!!) but it's hard to see the me I want to be. I'm trying my best to change myself into the me that I want to be. So far I've ordered contacts, spent a crap load of money on clothes (and I still don't have enough). I'm getting my hair done again (like always its going to be totally awesome! seriously). I'm going to spend about 5,000 on my teeth (teeth really?) My teeth aren't white (no enamel, yes I'm a freak) so I'm doing venures. School starts in, get this, one week!!! ouch!!! YEah!! ha I'm both excited and scared. I haven't decided about the other job yet but I'm thinking no. Ugh but the gas money to drive to Rogers! Shoot me! Hmmm. . . . so what else? My life is dreadfully boring (did I say dreadfull?) I think I'm done talking about these things . . . .for now. :)