Dying for a Beer

Jake only had one more door to knock on before he could call it quits for the day. He was dying for that end of the day beer.

He looked down his list and found that the next person he needed to see was a Miss Marlene Husk at 2010 Evening Shade Lane. He checked his map and saw that the address was only one street over so he decided to hoof it rather than try to find another parking space.

Jake had applied for this Census takers position because he needed some kind of income. The economics had made jobs scarce for the recent college grads and he had student loans coming due. It was a job, even if it was temporary.

As he approached the house, he noticed that it looked not exactly scary, but in disrepair and approaching a run down condition. Once on the porch he pressed the doorbell beside the front door, but no chimes came with that action. "Dead", he thought. So he opened the screen and gave a knock on the door. Nearly as soon as his knuckles met the wood of the door, the door opened. It was almost like the occupant had been expecting a visit.

“Hello, I’m Jake Shine”, he said, “I’m from the census bureau. Is there a Miss Marlene Husk at home?”

Someone shuffled out of the shadows into the light of the doorway the first thing he saw a little below eye level was a luxurious head of blonde hair. Then, a bit unnervingly, a wrinkled bony hand traveled up and tucked some of those golden locks behind a time ravaged ear. The lobe of which looked as if it carried the weight the diamond stud earring so long that gravity had left it flapping a bit. That’s when the woman turned her head up to eyeball him directly and asked, “Say again?”

Jake repeated himself as he looked over the withered old crone before him and couldn’t help but think that the hair on her head didn’t match the person below it.

The crone croaked “I’m Marlene Husk”, in response to Jake’s inquiry.

He just couldn’t get over the contrast of the beautiful hair and the withered, crusty husk of the woman who owned the flowing mane. “Miss Husk, I’m here because you didn’t fill out and send back your census form. Do you have a few moments to answer some questions?” He thought, “It must be a wig.”

As he waited for a response, he noticed the woman’s eyes. They appeared to be a very light blue but they were occluded with a milky white haze over them, somewhat like those of a dead fish. "Cataracts; probably couldn’t see a foot in front of her face."

The elder Miss Husk confirmed those thoughts with her statement, “I don’t get much mail, and the mail that I do get I can’t read very well. I can’t believe that it’s time for another census. Where has the time gone?” She continued, “I’ll be more than happy to answer your questions.”

She was opening the door wider when she stumbled and swooned. She reached out with her wizened bony hand and happened to grab Jake’s arm in the process for stability. It was weird because as she grabbed him there was a static spark that jumped from his skin to her hand.

Concerned, Jake asked, “Are you alright?”

“Oh, I’m fine, just a little weak at times. I always seem to wobble a bit now”, she replied as the woman straightened a bit.

“If you’re not feeling well perhaps I can return tomorrow, Miss Husk?”

She was still gripping his arm; Jake noticed that the grip seemed to be getting stronger. Her touch was electric.

“No. No. No.” trying to reassure him, “Lets sit for a moment and let me gather my strength. There’s no need to make another trip.”

He stepped into the house guiding the woman with a death grip on him, he couldn’t help but think of the rules he was breaking. He was supposed to get the answers to his questions without entering the person’s home. His boss had been very specific about avoiding impropriety, the government didn’t want any reason for legal action that always seemed to follow when census takers over-stepped the bounds of being impersonal with the population.

Looking down on the age creased face of this elderly woman his only other thought was to help her get comfortable, get his questions answered and get the hell home. As he viewed her face he couldn’t but think of her possible age. The creases and lines of her dusky face were deep, not grand canyon deep but definitely deep enough to swallow light. Taking in the rest of her as she shuffled along, he noticed that her clothes, although of fine quality, seemed draped on her bent frame. She had on what appeared to be a cashmere sweater of pink over a cream blouse with ruffle collar. The blouse was cut for a much younger woman. The way she was stooped it showed him way more of a view past the wattle of her neck and far lower down her cleavage revealing her white lace bra than Jake really wanted to see. Below she wore a tan colored pleated skirt that came to just below her knees and on her feet were stylish tan flats. If time hadn’t done a number on her, she probably would have been relatively tall at a younger age. She pointed and he guided her over to a well worn flower patterned couch in her antique appointed sitting room.

She sat down and she pointed again. Jake’s eyes followed the finger through a doorway to a tidy looking kitchen. She said, “Jake, I don’t have many vises but I would surely enjoy a cold beer. Could you go get me one out of the Frigidaire in the kitchen? Please, help yourself to one as it would be sad for me to be drinking alone.”

She let go of his arm and as he turned towards the kitchen he thought that her eyes seemed a bit clearer with the pale blue showing a glimmer of life he hadn’t seen before. Somehow the blue eyes seemed to go better with her hair now. As he crossed the floor through the kitchen doorway he was explaining that it was against the rules for him to be drinking on the job. He reached the antiquated fridge and looked in. At least she had good taste in beer and he grabbed one out for her. As he straightened up he felt a wave of vertigo. Holding onto the fridge door until it passed he thought that maybe he was a bit dehydrated. He checked his watch and saw that it was 3 o’clock and he was officially off duty now. He shrugged his shoulders and grabbed a beer for himself thinking it can’t hurt now. He really was dying for a drink.

After a bit of hunting Jake found a bottle opener and returned to the couch to sit next to Miss Husk with the open beers. He was happy to get off his feet for moment. He couldn’t remember being tired, it must have been a longer day than he realized.

Just as he sat down, Miss Husk produced two glasses from somewhere, and then she promptly took and poured the beers into the glasses. She handed him the beer with the most foam and giggled, “I can’t have too much of the suds or I get gassy.” She then took a sip of her beer.

The giggle was a bit unsettling as it seemed to belong to a much younger woman than who was sitting next to him. That didn’t stop him from taking a good long swallow of his own beer. Feeling a bit refreshed, Jake decided to get down to business as he flipped open his folder and asked, “If you don’t mind we’ll get to those questions now?”

With quicker movements than he would have given her credit for the woman set her drink down, readjusted herself on the couch so that her knee just touched his and set that finely boned hand on Jake’s thigh just above the knee. Then answered, “Go ahead.”

Was that a static spark he felt just as she went to touch him? It sounded like he had heard a faint crackle of electricity. Was that ozone he smelled? He passed it off as a symptom of his wooziness. If it weren’t for her age he would almost misconstrue her forwardness as flirting. Instead, he marked it up to the elderly being touchy feely as they held onto life.

He was concentrating on his list of questions, but he was having a hard time focusing his eyes. He took a moment to rub his eyes and then reached over grabbed his beer and took another swig. As he set the beer back down he thought, I know these questions by heart and asked, “Miss Husk, can I get the correct spelling of your name?”

She started rattling off the letters of her name, Jake jotted them down but found that he was nearly nodding off by the time she was done.

“Next question, are you the head of the household?”

Jake didn’t hear the answer to that question. He did vaguely remember waking for a moment in a bit of haze and seeing a much younger woman sitting next to him with a beautiful head of golden blonde hair. Then Jake remembered nothing at all.

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The next morning Marlene was humming to herself as she vacuumed a large quantity of dust from her couch and the floor around it. She was feeling spry and alive today. "It’s been years since she felt this good." As she busied herself tiding her home, she thought of the young man who had so kindly made her day yesterday. Thank goodness he had been so young and full of vitality.

She remembered the men from years before that had stopped at her door from the census. So many men, and unfortunately most of them had already been used up by their years with so little life left to share with her. But Jake, yes that was his name, had been full of life and he had come along just in time to save her.

Having finished her vacuuming she went to put the vacuum back in the closet when she caught a glimpse of herself in the full length mirror on the other side of the sitting room. She took a moment to admire herself more closely. Her hair was brushed to a silky golden blonde which fell about her unmarred face with the palest blue eyes that sparkled and shined. The reflection was that of a statuesque woman with a voluptuous frame that filled her outfit well. “My god, I’m beautiful again.” she thought.

She looked back down at the vacuum and said, “Thank you Jake.”

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