I've lost my heart

All this time, I was so sure of what I wanted to do.

All of this time I was so sure of where I wanted to go.

All this time I was sure of what my goals were.

All this time, I that I knew what my passion was and where it lied.



Till came the day I realized,

my heart was nothing more than a bottomless pit.

From all that has happened, birth to now.



There was nothing worth fighting for,

nothing worth feeling happy for,

nothing feeling to have a passion for.

If I could only taste happiness and joy for once.

Perhaps that could have guided me on for a while longer.

I realized my heart has been hurting,

till it could no longer take anymore pain.



It was ripping, tearing and dying faster than I excepted.

Now where my heart once was,

is nothing but a bottomless pit,

where there is nothing by pain, sorrow, regret, tears and depression.

I have tried, I have fought, I have tried standing up again.



But, I can’t change anything for,

I believe all this was decided before our births.

If this was what were to happen to me.

I would rather I never took a step back from it all.

To take a closer look at myself and what I’ve become.



The passion I once had and loved,

has vanished with my heart.

I have tried many times to grasp for it,

to seek it back.

But, there was nothing but emptiness.

Emptiness that builds up in me, as time passes.



The expression upon my face of uncaring, unfeeling,

was reflecting what I felt inside the space where my heart once was.

In order for me to feel that empty space,

is an impossible task,

even though the saying goes, you don’t know till you try.



But, I have tried, I have seen enough that my heart,

yearns for no more than what I have seen.

I have fallen weary and exhausted of my surroundings,

the struggle from the time since my birth to now.

There is not one moment I want to remember of that,

was a sweet memory, all there was, was bitterness.



I’ve lost my heart,

lost it all,

lost myself in the abyss of who I was,

of what my passion was.

I’ve lost my heart, dwelling here is just an empty shell.

Seeking for a time for it to all end, I am just so weary, so tired.



Of it all, I have lost my heart,

lost the fight, lost my passion,

I wish to forget all the memories everything,

be brainwashed if its a must,

I’ve have lost my heart to a no turning back point.



~Jae