Just shoot me

I went to bed dreading today and now I’m awake and having to face it. It isn’t like I haven’t had a year to prepare for it but I kept putting it out of my head, I do that with unpleasant things. Too late now, so I get up and prepare my self--- you know wash, shave, make sure my hair looks okay and of course put on my normal daily attire. We all head for breakfast and my stomach is in knots, anticipating my fate to come later in the day. Everything seems to be moving in slow motion. I dread that today is the day they will shoot me. I’m not even sure why they must, there has to be another way, another means to the same end. I didn’t do anything to deserve this.

I go through the motions of my day and everyone seems wary of talking to me, but that could be just me. For lunch I have my favorite meal of meatloaf, mashed potatoes with gravy, sweet corn, and biscuits. This is the lone bright spot in this day. About an hour after lunch they came and told me it was time to go. They led me to the area of execution and the lights seemed dim. There was a kneeling bench where I first was allowed to spend some time. After a few minutes I was told to sit in a hard, stiff backed chair and to hold my head up. Bright lights were turned on me and I could just barely make out that there were persons in front of me. “Hold still” someone said. I replied “Go ahead and just shoot me”. Then the lights flashed and the camera clicked, my school picture taken for another year.