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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1716148-Energy-Crisis
Rated: 18+ · Other · Fantasy · #1716148
Humans are herd animals
              How much oil is there? How do we live without fossil fuels?
    China is the peak of oil consumption. One billion people, who want everything.
    That's not going to happen. There will be an energy crisis. War will break out.
    But, nothing will change the population densities accept death. Mass starvation
    and plagues will follow the radioactive fallout. But, more importantly, what will
    Sandra Bullocks next project be?

            Sandra Bullock had been the highest paid actress in HOLLYWOOD.
    Now, she lived off her organic garden in Ontario. "I should have bought more pumpkin
    seeds." she thought. Sandra's agent had sent his favorite actress to Canada to escape
    the radio active fallout. It was his last duty to preserve the greatest actress he had ever
    known. He was killed by a Hostess semi truck, while trying to escape L.A. Sandra scratched
    her butt. It was a hot day for October. She picked her beats and urinated to enrich the
    soil with ammonia. "If only I had some vinegar." she muttered. The cauliflower were still crisp.
    Sandra liked to be nude outdoors. She had gotten very hairy.

            Why bother shaving? Most of the men were killed in wars and gang turf battles.
    Today she would have soup and cabbage. Her mind always wandered off to all the great
    movies she had been apart of: Speed and Speed 2 and the Academy Award Winning
    story of a soccer mom, who rescues a 400 pound black man from poverty. She had done
    a lot of good. But, no one would remember that. There was no way to play the movies.
    There was no electricity. It takes machines and factories to build alternative solar or wind
    power. All of that was destroyed. Tears swelled in her eyes. She was just a naked farm girl.

          "Hi!" a voice greeted her from behind. Oh, yes it was that pervert Muzzy. She took a
    deep breath. Muzzy had forgotten to bathe in the nearby stream. "Ah,you caught a thing with six eyes?"
    Muzzy was a hunter. He hunted with a bow he had bought before the war. "Yeah! It's a really big
    spider!" he answered and flopped it at Sandra's hairy feet. "Ooooo Yum!" she said with a toothy
    smile. "You know I think it's a mutation. But, I can't find any other game. You think we should
    eat it?" Muzzy flashed his yellow teeth. "I don't think so. It might be poisonous." Sandra picked
    up the twenty pound spider and tossed it into the compose. She sighed and hugged Muzzy.
    "Could you (cough) bathe?" she gasped. "Sure!" he answered and grabbed Sandra by the arm.
    In two shakes of a lambs tail they were splashing into the stream. Muzzy humped Sandra
    like a jack rabbit. Sandra put her hand on Muzzy's face, "You sure are a horny hillbilly."
    she giggled as she tried to pry him off.

          Sandra made sure to pick all the lice off Muzzy. Then she scrubbed him down with lime soup.
    "I thought about a movie for you!" Muzzy burped as Sandra scrubbed his belly. She rolled her eyes.
    "Wonder Woman!" he gave a yellow toothy smile. Sandra took some cloth and water to rub his teeth.
    Muzzy gurgled and spit. "We could play act it. I'll be Col. Trevor and you rescue me!" his smile
    was whiter. Sandra smiled back and then gave Muzzy a hummer. His jaw dropped as he made
    monkey noises. Sandra's hand came up to Muzzy's mouth and covered it. She kissed him
    and spit.

          Communication had regressed to horse and sailing ships. The world was much bigger and simpler.
    Neither Sandra or Muzzy had resieved any mail for years. But, today a mounted postman sat on his
    horse above them at their bath. Sandra sprung to her feet, "Who? What do you want?" she stammered.
    "I have a letter for a Muzzy." the postman answered and dismounted. "What? Oh, thanks. Would you
    like some beats?" Muzzy held up the beats. The postman took one and ate. "Might I avail myself of
    your women's hospitality?" the postman inquired. "Of course. That's the law." Muzzy replied as he read
    his letter. Sandra glared at him, but Muzzy was to busy reading. The postman partook of Sandra in
    the bushes.. "Hey! Sandra! There's going to be an election of a North American Community President!"
    Muzzy shouted to the shaking bushes. "Ah.. a Miss Angelina Jolie is running and a guy too;
    Jeff Bridges! Who you want to vote for?!" Muzzy shouted to the bushes. The horse was gone.
    "Oh, shit." Muzzy dropped his letter and looked behind the bushes. Sandra was there, putting mud on
    her butt. "Wow! I thought he took you!" Muzzy exclaimed. "I wish he had! But, he said I'd break his horse!"
    Sandra shouted back and threw mud at Muzzy. "Well.. it is the law. So few people left." his answer
    was childish. Sandra stood up and stomped into the stream to wipe her butt.

        "It takes seven gallons of oil to make one tire." Muzzy said as he swung out on the tire hung over the
    stream. "What?" Sandra queried. She did not see Muzzy splash behind her. "It's in the letter." he spit
    as he surfaced. "That's not our problem! I'm pregnant!" Sandra's eyes filled with tears. Muzzy smacked her
    on the butt. "That's great! Will call him Enkidu!" Muzzy laughed and splashed. "Are you nuts? And what
    if its a girl?" Muzzy stood in the stream pondering, "Zoe!" "And what about .. dating?" Sandra looked at
    Muzzy her face submerged up to her eyes. .. He hadn't thought that far ahead. "Well, there's the postman."
    Muzzy voice trailed off. He rubbed the back of his head and flopped backwards into the stream.
    "We will have to search for other families." Sandra answered doing a frog swim around Muzzy. He floated.
    "That's easier said than done. We have fresh water here and food. Traveling could lead us nowhere."
    Muzzy answered as he floated. "Okay. Then, I'm Eve and your Adam and were going to be incestuous."
    Sandra said still doing a frog stroke. "Let's just wait and see. Maybe, someone will come along?
    Or, we could send the kid away; when he can fend for himself." his answer was terse. He sat down
    on the pebble bank. Muzzy looked at his bride with tribulation. "Shhh." Sandra kissed him.

    Reflections: Seth the son of Adam did take a wife(Gen 5:3-7). And Cain did take a wife(Gen 4:17).
                      Were there Pre-Adamite women? "As there were no human beings" Saint Augustine
                      says, "except those who had been born of Adam and Eve(Gen 5:4), men married their
                      sisters; an act which was as certainly dictated by necessity in those ancient days.
                      (The City of God, ch15:16)."
                    Eve had nine daughters in the Book of Jubilees.
    =+=
 
 
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