Never real

Happiness seemed to be a fleeing emotion,
and distant i stayed from reality,
for my own protection and my own safety,
then it happened so fast i couldnt grasp it all.
I could just feel, and yes i felt what a powerful force,
i couldnt fight it, it carried me away on its own little chariot,
a high, indeed a drug i needed to survive ,but it was all an illusion,
a mirage that was never real,
the only hard part is i believed in it till the bitter end,
and now, i suffer the aftermath.