Picture Attack

The man entered the store cautiously, his eyes not yet fully open. It was still pretty early in the morning and you wouldn't expect there to be many customers, yet it always surprised him how many there actually were.

He proceeded to sigh and move to the picture department, he recognized the fella at the counter: A little sleazebag with a knack for playing on people's fears and insecurities.

"Ohoy! Welcome to the picture department! How may I be of service?" Said the clerk with fake teeth shining through an even faker smile.
The man hesitated, he couldn't stop himself from looking at the sets of new pictures hanging on the wall behind the clerk. Big mistake.The clerk himself turned around, then turned back with his eyes lit up like fireflies.

"Ah, wait! I recognize you! You're Laura's boyfriend aren't you?" The clerk said.
The man said nothing, it wasn't actually official yet, they had been dating for a couple of weeks only, but things were going so well they might as well be in a relationship. The clerk decided -despite the man's resentment- to continue talking:
"Hmm, I heard last night was pretty wild. But you weren't there were you? How come?"
He actually had to go visit his family..in a different country. The distance was irritating, to say the least, but he still remained silent as the clerk pulled one of the pictures off the wall.
"Take a look at this beauty! Laura enjoying the night with some drinks and two..no three guy friends of hers, I love the lighting on this one."
The man said nothing.
"How about this? This one is more artistic! It's in black&white, shows her in a ballerina costume doing an elaborate dance move next to some other guy wearing his dancing gear. Ha, hold on hold on, this one is the best!" The clerk then proceeded to pick up a framed picture that was placed on the upper right side of the wall behind him. It was quite impressive to see such a short man reach so high up, but glee can do that to people.
"There we are, look at that! She is posing for the camera with her friend. Mmm, is he German? Look at those blue eyes and perfect blond hair! And that body..whoa! It's a miracle she's in the picture at all, he could probably cover two of her up!"

Starting to feel nauseous, the man closed his eyes. It's the neuroses, it's just the neuroses. Good God, why so early in the morning though?? At least the clerk stopped talking, that was a blessing in itself. The man slowly opened his eyes, smiled, handed the picture he was carrying to the clerk and said:
"Here is a picture of me as the sun rises in the background, please set it as my profile image." Then the man started to walk away towards the exit.
"What?? What kind of response is that? Are you not angry? Are you not Jealous??" The clerk yelled. The man turned around without stopping (now he was walking backwards) and yelled back:
"Why should I be? She doesn't like blonds!" Then he left the store before the clerk could retort.

Outside! The air so fresh outside of the store called "FB". Finally able to breathe again, the man turned his attention towards his cell phone, he had just received a message. It was from Laura. He read it, then a warm smile filled his face.