A Journey from I know nothing to nothing is required to know |
I have begun my journey from Not knowing anything to it is not required to know anything to become all knowing and i prey that i can feel the truth of it It all began when i was a child - the first of it i could remember is my choice to see a Shiva movie with my grand parents when my siblings ,cousins ,aunt had decided to go for a more entertaining movie Dushman or so i recollect. From my child hood to adult hood , success did not disturb/excite me but i was concerned about my failures - and i failed in al areas - my best was just not enough , I can classify my failures - in professional life - i feel that i could handle difficult situations and take on any work - was a problem for my superiors and they were very much uncomfortable with it - hence i was ignored most of the time when the time came for reward and recognition and infact i have been handed over the marhcing orders when i felt deep in my heart i should have been rewarded handsomely , coming out of this situation not once but thrice made me go into my shell and ask for the logical reason ,- to do something good , on the domestic front my observation/sensory powers being not upto the mark and not wanting much to eat or shop or talk and mix , there was and still is a feud in my family and i find myself a complete misfit . This lead to my search for something that was missing , i could nothing right and i questioned my life, infact i now rememeber two poems for my college - titled a living corpse and stitched lips - that anout describes me , i feel my heart contains all types of emotions repressed , suppressed, wanting to come out and i pray that this i learn fast . I am reading the Gita and impressed by it and i have full faith in the wisdom of it . Here the Gita states who ever reads me would be freed from this world . I believe that this lead to my Guru ,my master thorugh his reprsetnative Thakar Singh Maharaj callling me to be initiated , I did accept with the only question at that time - that it should not harm me . I now realize that to succeed in the all knowing - the master is the best and the most important Gift that can happen to an individual . Regular meditations, questioning, shotuing why me , consistent failures, betrayal , physical incapcities , fears - now i can see them , My Master has promised that this will be the last life in this world , I have chanced upon quite a few literature that i have read and they also state that persons reading it would not come in this world . I have always posed this question to me , master i have not come in this world of my own, i will not go out of this world of my own , what is the existence gaining out of my stay here - i salute the plants , sun, moon , water, earth air ,some animals , like the cow , goat - where i know they are serving the existence in much better manner with bliss and spontaneously , I am no different from them , my life has to be also like that , what is that knowing by which i will know everything , from where does my desires thoughts, frustration arise , if everything is insde me, where is that inside , this i can see and unless this is bliss, what use the after life , Ask and you will be given and i have asked this inspite of not knowing anything - like a child . In socrates style , i know that i know nothing now , My Master and all my reading says that nothing is required to be known , I am sure as the old saints like Kabir , Gurunanak, Buddha , Rumi, Inayat Khan, Shams Tabrez new nothing but what they wrote and taught is simply bliss . My own master lineage from Tulsi das , swami shiv dayal singh , baba jaimal , rai shaligram , baba sawan singh ji, kirpal singh maharaj , my own thakar and the current master Baljeet singh , the mother have merged with God and I am very much sure that i will find this and than live the mystery of life as is required by my existence I shall return to this page once i advance on this journey , all types of feedback welcome and i am waiting |