Last year

Last year we were happy, all of us living in our blissful ignorance. That was before we truly found out that children can die. We all knew children died, but somewhere in the back of our minds we had the child like ignorance that children came back to life. Death for a child could not be permanent that would make the world a truly cruel world to live in. And who wants to live in a place that children, innocent children can actually die.

We heard about it in the news and we read it in the papers, and even as adults it never seemed like a reality to us. Maybe we thought that after three days they were resurrected, like Jesus. Children ARE NOT suppose to die, that is just how it is suppose to be. We ignorantly believe that when we become pregnant with them that we have signed some invisible document that we have made a deal with life that our children do not die until they are old and that is only after we die.

Children are not suppose to die before us, they just aren’t suppose to. They are suppose to live, play, be happy, marry, and give us grandchildren. But they are ABSOLUTELY NOT suppose to die.

That was the ignorant bliss we lived in last year, last year has passed now. This year the news was about our child. This year we found out that children do die, there is no three days grace period, and they do not get resurrected. We found out that children DO die. Children die of disease, children die from accidents, and we found out that even children get murdered.

We would give anything to go back to the blissful ignorance we lived in last year. Last year before we knew that child death was permanent, before murder became reality. Last year before she was gone.