Aven and Beckie -- A week in letters.

These were my friend and my conversations from when she was away from school for a week. I recently re-discoved them, and decided to put them on here.


Aven And Beckie: A week in letters

Betwixt Cap'n Beckie Evans 'n Yerself

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 6:58 in the evenin'
Beckie,
you should have been here in Chemistry – we got to play with thermo-whatsit paint. IT CHANGES COLOUR! Or vanishes more accurately. We got to paint bits of paper :)
English is – was – pretty boring. You said you’d sit next to me. You lied! You weren’t sitting there!
My budgie, who fed off your aura of power, is now dead, due to starvation. You have Harold the Invisible budgie’s death on your conscience. Feel bad.
Now smile.
I spent most of my English lesson writing on Anna’s folder, Re. would Harry Potter be killed by an arrow if he was too busy casting lumos? I said yes, he would die horribly, but those two didn’t agree. (And, as this conversation via folder went, it turns out that Ginny couldn’t save him because she was having another Baby, who is to be called Aven. I feel special)
Hannah then said that, since you weren’t there, then the part of you in me has no power. I hastened to correct her mistake: we are one and the same, no part of each other in each other, and, since we are the same, I will always have some of your power through the link, but, since I haven’t worked at it, it lies dormant until we are separated.
She didn’t believe me.

Now I sign off,
The letter writing sheep.
:)

(There is more you know. I'll give it to you in doses)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 7:31 in the evenin'
Beckie,
don’t you think she looks like a peanut?
Did you know that Ms Mason’s first name is Patricia?
And Guess what?
I know a song called Patricia the Stripper.
It made me laugh. Do you think it’s about her?
And don’t ask how I know a song called Patricia the stripper, It’s by a very good (and, I think, Catholic) artist who, for some reason, decided to write this song.
In case you didn’t get that, I’m in RE unfortunately, but Adam, for reasons known only to him, has decided to spontaneously move to the back of the classroom, next to Henry. Putting my confusion aside, I have to admit that I am relieved.
One of the reasons the ‘Keep Sunday Special Campaign’ has to shut shops on Sunday is because it will ‘help local businesses’. Like the shops that they have shut. Hmm…..
Something else to add to your list (possibly)
1) I will not charm the chairs in the great hall to spontaneously burst into song, as this is exceptionally irritating and their timing is always spectacularly inconvenient.
2) One will not stand on a table in the great hall and begin to strip tease.
Come on, they’re not that bad! What number are you on now? 150 or something?
I’ve got to say it; I think you have too much free time, especially in English.

Bye bye,
The letter writing sheep.
:)

Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 7:40 in the evenin'
They're not bad, but my little red book of amazingness (I'm thinking of calling her Anne, what do you think?) so I will add it when I get the chance.
I did actually know that about Mason; however that little nugget of information about the song was inspirational/entertaining. I cannot however, understand how Mason could do that with the seating arrangements..!? Has Hachey blown her top yet? Could you also tell Henry our bet still counts, please?
Who do you think looks like a peanut? Hannah? Can you also tell Williams I did my coursework on time and that I gave it to Hannah please?

I meant to ask you earlier, but I'm getting my hair done tomorrow, what do you think I should get done/changed/etc...

Thank you letter writing sheep,
Love, Big V :)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 7:48 in the evenin'
Beckie,
have you chosen your conformation name yet? Knowing you, it will be something obscure that I can’t pronounce. Oh well, it will be unique.

The letter writing sheep strikes again.
:)

Beckie,
how many colours are in your sock draw?

The letter writing sheep gets her revenge.
:)

Beckie,
I am extremely bored. I always forget how mind-numbingly boring RE is.
Sorry, I forgot, according to Mr. Berridge in Music last lesson, Boring is a word for stupid people and us ‘musicians’ must never use it again. That went down the toilet pretty fast. Oh well. I’m not sure I can fake enough enthusiasm to care.
Or enough energy to fake enthusiasm.
I swear this lesson drains all of the life out of me.

The (melting) letter writing sheep.
:(

Beckie,
Shock horror, Ms Mason just said there was more to life than homework. Does this mean we can not do it?

The letter writing sheep wins again.
:)

Beckie,
There are a lot of little notes on this page, you’re probably sick of reading them but I’ve got one more page to fill. HAHAHA (Cough, Cough)

The Letter writing sheep Bites back.
:)
PS. I know the evil laugh needs work.

(And Anne sounds like a good name, but I INSIST that her middle name be Carolyn, because Anne is like Anna and Hannah, so Carolyn is like Aven :)
And we didn't have Hashey today.
And i will tell Henry.
Why don't you try to use your amazing Psychic abilities to contact him?)

Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 7:53 in the evenin'
I only have a few colours in my sock drawer; i rang Ails to check, 9 different colours, but 26 different tones/hues, how about in yours?
I was actually thinking that I'd go for a generic name, like Patrick or Moses. Did she say anything about it?
Anyway, you didn't ask the most important question, WHAT ABOUT MY HAIR!?
And I tried with my abilities... I didn't fail, it just didn't work.

Love always, Big V :)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 8:38 in the evenin'
Beckie,
don’t worry, this is the last page. I think, it may be that I just can’t count up to four and that it turns out that there are another 2 and ½ pages to go.
And I’m sorry about the handwriting. It’s worse than yours and (possibly) worse than Hannah’s. There is a valid reason; I’m writing this while trying to hide it from Mason.
Today, I was forced to endure torture that schools trick us into attending by calling it “RE” My brains are melting. FML
Today, I sank to new lows. I wilfully wrote an FML story. I am ashamed with myself. What is wrong with me? MLIA.
How to irritate the Cullens:
Ask them why they don’t attack Bella when she’s on her period.
Not to do at Hogwarts:
I will not put magic colour changing ink in the dryer during the black robes wash. I will not use the excuse ‘I wanted to see if it would show up. It’s not my fault it did’.
I will not practice Non-verbal spells on other students during Breakfast.
Any of these up to your high standards? Well, it seems that I am actually finished now. I have no more paper. Don’t cry Beckie, You’ll see me again soon.
Keep Smiling.

The fall of the Letter Writing Sheep.
:)
One day, when you are away again, she will return...

Maybe tomorrow.


Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 5:54 in the evenin'
English
Beckie,
Have you got a false beard yet?
And apparently you are having an affair. I am shocked. Is your beloved informed, or should I tell Harry?
I still haven’t found the answer to the great unanswered question: Who came first, The Ninja or the Waldo?
And guess what?!?!?!?!?!?
I’VE FINISHED THE AMAZING LESSON TIMETABLE!
And now (since I get bored very easily and have decided that I am bored again) I have decided to change my normal timetable into its Hogwarts equivalent. Problem is, it’s not working particularly well and it is becoming increasingly apparent that you are not the only one with too much free time.
English is, as normal, very productive (*coughs*) we’re playing with the coloured pens, highlighters and a tri-coloured pencil, and we’ve filled a page.
And did you know that there is such a thing as a hemi-demi-semi quaver?
There are now Waldos all over the school. Anything to do with you?
I have found out that stroking your invisible beard/chin is both soothing and addictive.

Signed,

the letter writing sheep returns.
:)


(How did you get your hair done?
And how is it up in the north?
And I have one for every lesson :S that means there are 5, if you can bear to put up with that many...)


Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:10 in the evenin'
I look forward to the next four :)
What's all this about me having an affair!? Let's face it; will the question about the ninja and the Waldo ever be sorted?? I think not...
Did you still keep the amazing timetable too? I want to see the finished version.
Ahhh, English :) how is Williams? Has she commented on my absence? And what am I supposed to be doing for speaking and listening? I have no idea, as usual...
Thank you for another golden nugget of info (I’m referring to the hemi-demi-semi quaver fact here), I gather you had another productive music lesson..? ;)

I did get my hair done, imagine the colours of a pineapple (without the green) and you have the colour of my hair. And I had a LOAD hacked off. It feels so short.
The north is foggy. And cold. And hilly. Meh.

Keep fearing the name,
Big V :)


Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:33 in the evenin'
Biology
Beckie,
Don’t you think that schools should change the name of biology to herbology?
The habitat of Chihuahuas is handbags, duh!
Imagine a Chihuahua breeding with a German shepherd according to miss it’s possible. That’s what we’re doing here by the way; we’re on classification of species. Also, theoretically, a lion could cross with a house cat.
They didn’t really think about the seating arrangements, I just noticed that I am sitting next to something labelled “Biohazard”. Hmmm….
A jeep just drove past. I’m scared.
I’ve just realised, you may be extremely bored of receiving daily essays from me cunningly disguised as letters. I would stop, but then boredom would overcome me. So you get the joy of being bombarded with page after page of writing.
We’ve got to write a report on some person or other. It has to be a page long, but a double spaced page. So is it still a page long?
And you can’t escape it, because it’s due in two weeks.
I’m going to see Chicago is a week (on the 27th)!
I am SO bored.
A similarity between Chimpanzees and humans: wrinkles.
Hogwarts: I will not call Professor McGonagall a chimpanzee because “she has wrinkles”
Hogwarts again: I will not set up a water slide from my dormitory window to the lake and push first years down it.
Science is (Finally) over.
But don’t worry.
I’ll be back…

The letter writing sheep fears no-one
:)

Music comes later, and i learnt that golden nugget a while back, but was reminded of it in English. The speaking and listening malark: you need to learn about dickens for Monday.
And I got all excited when you said think pineapple. I thought you'd got drunk and dye your hair green and yellow.
And, unfortunately, Mrs Williams has not said anything about your absence.
She must not have noticed.
Yes, the amazing timetable is being kept, and it's all colour coded now. Please wait while i type this all up...
:)

Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:38 in the evenin'
I wait with baited breath.
Well, tell Williams I am…missing her lessons? Make her notice my absence! And tell Toddy I'm sorry, please.
What do I have to write the report on? I hate biology, I wish it was easier to cut class :/.
More soon, and I look forward to tomorrow's version, should be fun, because you shall be bored in RE :):) but I shall be jealous if you do speed stacking again. Remember, I always win our matches :)

Big V

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:49 in the evenin'
Drama
Beckie,
I have not opportunity to write. Drama is mildly interesting.

The letter writing sheep enjoys drama (Shock horror)
:)

(Don’t start pining too soon, I’ve got another three lessons to go... :| and the report is on some Carl person who invented our way of sorting organisms.)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:55 in the evenin'
Unfortunately, there will now be a short respite while I hole punch a large number of bits of paper.

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 7:09 in the evenin'
Beckie,
for some reason, we are in the food room, and are being slowly baked (gas mark 2) due to the heat in this room.
I am very hungry, and trying to decide whether my hunger pangs are due to the fact that now would be just the right time for 2nd breakfast and/or brunch.
I also feel short, as everyone else is sitting on stools, and I am not. There are too many of us for the food room’s furniture, so I ended up on a green chair from the sociology room next door.
Hogwarts: I must not bewitch chairs in the great hall to suddenly shrink while their occupants are eating/drinking.
We are doing co-ordinate geometry mixed with Pythagoras. Do you have any idea how boring that is? We’re going back to equations of lines too. How positively thrilling.
How many different types of sheep do you think there are?

The letter writing sheep destroys all numbers
:)

Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 7:27 in the evenin'
Ahh, yes, the food room is often heated that way, ingenious really. When is the right time for second breakfast? I think i just need to be put on a drip; you know what i mean..?
DT food stools < green sociology chairs. <--REMEMBER THAT.
I need to write these in Anne Carolyn when I get back home...
Did Jogee actually set us MM hw? Because if he did, that's two weeks on the trot he'll be pisseddddddddd with me. :/
Are there 6000 types of sheep? Or am I totally over-guessing things?

Big V destroys all letter writing sheep.
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 7:31 in the evenin'
Music
Beckie,
Shh! We can’t make any noise! Seems slightly counter-productive for a MUSIC class, doesn’t it?
And, as an antidote to maths, this room is freezing.
Now we’re listening back to our performances in all their majesty. Fortunately, mine wasn’t chosen. Unfortunately, Anna’s was.
Hogwarts: I will not stick post-it notes on the backs of other students.
Tom Kirby has a post-it on his back. It says “I have smelly feet”. But it’s okay, he put it there himself.
Hogwarts: I will not perform invisibility charms on all of the students in a classroom when a teacher leaves the room.
Anna says: You shouldn’t make rules you cannot keep↑
You probably shouldn’t encourage me, Beckie; it’s all your fault you’re getting 4 LARGE pages of writing (This double page spread is from my English Notebook).
I have just realised what else died with 2009; those New Year’s glasses with the 0s as eyes holes. 2010 doesn’t really work so well. You’d have to have a REALLY wide head. And 2011 wouldn’t work at all :(
Hogwarts: I will not convince the ghost band who played at Sir Nicholas’ Deathday party to play in the entrance hall on the first day of term.
Hogwarts: I am not ‘Lord Pamplefloop’
Hogwarts: Lord Voldemort is dead, and any attempts to convince the first years otherwise is against school rules.
Who do you think looks like a monkey?
You should get dreads and see how Mr. Gingell reacts to that. Then, the next day, bring in a parrot, then, slowly but surely, begin to transform your school uniform into a pirate costume.
Hogwarts: A parrot is not an accepted school pet.
Any of these worthy? If not, at least I tried.
Don’t worry Beckie; you’ll be rid of me soon. It’s not my fault I am incredibly bored.
Anna says: He just played my performance…My ears are bleeding…
Oh, ye Gods, Mr Berrige is being mildly nice…I’m scared…
I really hope we aren’t doing this for the WHOLE double lesson…Mind you, he said we’d be doing something on keyboards, which is probably even worse.
Anna says: Yes, I was rather dreading that.
Anna’s piece was in Aristocats! She rules!
Anna says: I know I do =)
However, she claims that she did not know this. Does being only subconsciously epic make her any less cool?
Anna…Drat, I forgot what I was going to put. Oh well.
I’m running out of space fast, aren’t I?
My glasses are sliding down my nose; I think they’re too big for me.
Don’t cry Beckie, you’ll see me soon.
Smile :)

The letter writing sheep vanishes once more.
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:53 in the evenin'
Physics
Beckie,
We’re in the computer room. Can’t write, teacher will notice.

The secret agent letter writing sheep.
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
R.E.
Beckie,
Adam smells like he is wearing girls’ perfume.
Do you think Ms Mason would notice if I shot myself?
Or if I shot Adam?
I agree with you, I wish I could ditch classes. No – class. RE. Or, even more specifically, this RE lesson. And I would do so with a smile and a wave.
This is, again, a mess, because I am writing while trying to hide this from both Adam and Ms Mason.
There is now a piece of cheese string flying around the room.
Shall we count sheep?
1. Normal sheep.
2. Ninja sheep.
3. Mutant sheep.
4. Ninja mutant sheep.
5. The sheep of scientific knowledge.
6. The sheep of scientific stupidity.
7. Rainbow sheep.
8. Reverse sheep.
9. White sheep.
10. Black sheep.
11. Blue sheep.
12. Harry Potter sheep.
13. Unlucky sheep.
14. Lucky sheep.
15. Gandalf sheep.
16. Batman sheep
17. Dead sheep
18. King sheep
19. Queen sheep
20. Princess sheep
21. Shot sheep
22. Secret agent sheep
23. Bookworm sheep
24. Christmas sheep
25. Halloween sheep
26. Rubber sheep
27. Chocolate sheep
28. Girly sheep
29. The good little church girl sheep
30. The sleepy sheepy
31. Chav sheep
32. Emo sheep
she’s restarted the lesson now. But 32 sheep in 5-10 minutes isn’t bad.
Mrs Williams just snuck into our lesson.
Mrs Williams just snuck out of our lesson.
33. Bodyguard sheep
34. The water slide addicts sheep
35. Pirate sheep
36. Celebrity sheep
RE is over. Would it be inappropriate to thank God?

The Letter writing sheep destroys all RE lessons.
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
PSHE
Beckie,
I’m writing up my list of sheep. I’m at 58 now, and not anywhere near being finished. Sorry if I don’t write much. In PSHE, we can do pretty much what we want.

The Letter writing sheep is not – really – writing a letter
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
PE
Beckie,
PE sucks. We didn’t do speed stacks, we did football.

The letter writing sheep is very muddy.
:(

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
RE (Again)
Beckie,
I think I’m going to spend most of this lesson adding to my list of sheep. I’m at 81.
Hogwarts: I will not dress first years up as different types of sheep.
I’ve got writers’ block at 121. Do you think that’s acceptable?
Now all I have to do is write to you. Aren’t you lucky?
As far as I can tell, we’re still doing exactly the same as we were doing at the start of the week.
I am REALLY bored. Have you got any more ideas for sheep? I’ve almost filled four big pages in two lessons. I rule. And I have too much free time. Like you.
I’ve filled four pages of my English book with sheep: 136 in all.
Between us, we could take over the world, couldn’t we?
137. Tree hugging sheep.
Hogwarts: I must not convince first years to climb the whomping willow.
I think you may already have that one. Sorry if you do.
These letters must be the highlight of your day. I mean, they remind you of ME! What else could you possibly ask for?
I should probably stop now, or I won’t have enough space for English and Maths.

The letter writing sheep has too much free time in lessons
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
Maths
Beckie,
Maths again, Oh joy. Don’t you love the fact that you get to miss a Thursday?
We’re doing co-ordinates again. We’re supposed to answer this question:
Where do the lines y=x and y=2x+1 meet?
I’m bored.
Hogwarts: I will not call Ancient Runes ‘Algebra’ and use that as an excuse to burn all Ancient runes books.
How to irritate the Cullens: Force them to endure Algebra.
This is torture, and that, coupled with Henry complaining about not understanding after not listening, I want to shoot myself.
Oops, Henry saw that bit :S.
Not all of it though.
And his immediate thought was that I was writing my diary. In the middle of a lesson. Erm…
Bored. Exceedingly so. For future reference, do you have any ideas as to what I could do when I am bored?
We’re now doing Pythagoras in Cuboids. And it’s as thrilling as it sounds.
I feel sorry for you, having to read all this drivel. You really shouldn’t encourage me.

The letter writing sheep has found a torture method
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:55 in the evenin'
English
Beckie,
Tasha says: A ninja has captured Aven and deformed her handwriting. I am telling you the truth about our apparently ‘boring’ school: (2 of these are true)
- Doggrell had a car-crash.
- Hannah has grown 3 legs.
- Aven is risking epilepsy to look at a ‘pretty’ video of squiggles.

Aven says: The ninja has returned me, and I now know the secret of what came first: The ninja or the Waldo. However, if I told you through writing, the paper would shrivel up, rather than reveal the secret, and, if I tried to reveal it through the internet, then all electricity on earth would spontaneously go ‘pop’ and die. And don’t get me started on if I just tried to tell you.

The enlightened letter writing sheep
:)

These were my friend and my conversations from when she was away from school for a week. I recently re-discoved them, and decided to put them on here.


Aven And Beckie: A week in letters

Betwixt Cap'n Beckie Evans 'n Yerself

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 6:58 in the evenin'
Beckie,
you should have been here in Chemistry – we got to play with thermo-whatsit paint. IT CHANGES COLOUR! Or vanishes more accurately. We got to paint bits of paper :)
English is – was – pretty boring. You said you’d sit next to me. You lied! You weren’t sitting there!
My budgie, who fed off your aura of power, is now dead, due to starvation. You have Harold the Invisible budgie’s death on your conscience. Feel bad.
Now smile.
I spent most of my English lesson writing on Anna’s folder, Re. would Harry Potter be killed by an arrow if he was too busy casting lumos? I said yes, he would die horribly, but those two didn’t agree. (And, as this conversation via folder went, it turns out that Ginny couldn’t save him because she was having another Baby, who is to be called Aven. I feel special)
Hannah then said that, since you weren’t there, then the part of you in me has no power. I hastened to correct her mistake: we are one and the same, no part of each other in each other, and, since we are the same, I will always have some of your power through the link, but, since I haven’t worked at it, it lies dormant until we are separated.
She didn’t believe me.

Now I sign off,
The letter writing sheep.
:)

(There is more you know. I'll give it to you in doses)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 7:31 in the evenin'
Beckie,
don’t you think she looks like a peanut?
Did you know that Ms Mason’s first name is Patricia?
And Guess what?
I know a song called Patricia the Stripper.
It made me laugh. Do you think it’s about her?
And don’t ask how I know a song called Patricia the stripper, It’s by a very good (and, I think, Catholic) artist who, for some reason, decided to write this song.
In case you didn’t get that, I’m in RE unfortunately, but Adam, for reasons known only to him, has decided to spontaneously move to the back of the classroom, next to Henry. Putting my confusion aside, I have to admit that I am relieved.
One of the reasons the ‘Keep Sunday Special Campaign’ has to shut shops on Sunday is because it will ‘help local businesses’. Like the shops that they have shut. Hmm…..
Something else to add to your list (possibly)
1) I will not charm the chairs in the great hall to spontaneously burst into song, as this is exceptionally irritating and their timing is always spectacularly inconvenient.
2) One will not stand on a table in the great hall and begin to strip tease.
Come on, they’re not that bad! What number are you on now? 150 or something?
I’ve got to say it; I think you have too much free time, especially in English.

Bye bye,
The letter writing sheep.
:)

Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 7:40 in the evenin'
They're not bad, but my little red book of amazingness (I'm thinking of calling her Anne, what do you think?) so I will add it when I get the chance.
I did actually know that about Mason; however that little nugget of information about the song was inspirational/entertaining. I cannot however, understand how Mason could do that with the seating arrangements..!? Has Hachey blown her top yet? Could you also tell Henry our bet still counts, please?
Who do you think looks like a peanut? Hannah? Can you also tell Williams I did my coursework on time and that I gave it to Hannah please?

I meant to ask you earlier, but I'm getting my hair done tomorrow, what do you think I should get done/changed/etc...

Thank you letter writing sheep,
Love, Big V :)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 7:48 in the evenin'
Beckie,
have you chosen your conformation name yet? Knowing you, it will be something obscure that I can’t pronounce. Oh well, it will be unique.

The letter writing sheep strikes again.
:)

Beckie,
how many colours are in your sock draw?

The letter writing sheep gets her revenge.
:)

Beckie,
I am extremely bored. I always forget how mind-numbingly boring RE is.
Sorry, I forgot, according to Mr. Berridge in Music last lesson, Boring is a word for stupid people and us ‘musicians’ must never use it again. That went down the toilet pretty fast. Oh well. I’m not sure I can fake enough enthusiasm to care.
Or enough energy to fake enthusiasm.
I swear this lesson drains all of the life out of me.

The (melting) letter writing sheep.
:(

Beckie,
Shock horror, Ms Mason just said there was more to life than homework. Does this mean we can not do it?

The letter writing sheep wins again.
:)

Beckie,
There are a lot of little notes on this page, you’re probably sick of reading them but I’ve got one more page to fill. HAHAHA (Cough, Cough)

The Letter writing sheep Bites back.
:)
PS. I know the evil laugh needs work.

(And Anne sounds like a good name, but I INSIST that her middle name be Carolyn, because Anne is like Anna and Hannah, so Carolyn is like Aven :)
And we didn't have Hashey today.
And i will tell Henry.
Why don't you try to use your amazing Psychic abilities to contact him?)

Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 7:53 in the evenin'
I only have a few colours in my sock drawer; i rang Ails to check, 9 different colours, but 26 different tones/hues, how about in yours?
I was actually thinking that I'd go for a generic name, like Patrick or Moses. Did she say anything about it?
Anyway, you didn't ask the most important question, WHAT ABOUT MY HAIR!?
And I tried with my abilities... I didn't fail, it just didn't work.

Love always, Big V :)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 19 roundabouts 8:38 in the evenin'
Beckie,
don’t worry, this is the last page. I think, it may be that I just can’t count up to four and that it turns out that there are another 2 and ½ pages to go.
And I’m sorry about the handwriting. It’s worse than yours and (possibly) worse than Hannah’s. There is a valid reason; I’m writing this while trying to hide it from Mason.
Today, I was forced to endure torture that schools trick us into attending by calling it “RE” My brains are melting. FML
Today, I sank to new lows. I wilfully wrote an FML story. I am ashamed with myself. What is wrong with me? MLIA.
How to irritate the Cullens:
Ask them why they don’t attack Bella when she’s on her period.
Not to do at Hogwarts:
I will not put magic colour changing ink in the dryer during the black robes wash. I will not use the excuse ‘I wanted to see if it would show up. It’s not my fault it did’.
I will not practice Non-verbal spells on other students during Breakfast.
Any of these up to your high standards? Well, it seems that I am actually finished now. I have no more paper. Don’t cry Beckie, You’ll see me again soon.
Keep Smiling.

The fall of the Letter Writing Sheep.
:)
One day, when you are away again, she will return...

Maybe tomorrow.


Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 5:54 in the evenin'
English
Beckie,
Have you got a false beard yet?
And apparently you are having an affair. I am shocked. Is your beloved informed, or should I tell Harry?
I still haven’t found the answer to the great unanswered question: Who came first, The Ninja or the Waldo?
And guess what?!?!?!?!?!?
I’VE FINISHED THE AMAZING LESSON TIMETABLE!
And now (since I get bored very easily and have decided that I am bored again) I have decided to change my normal timetable into its Hogwarts equivalent. Problem is, it’s not working particularly well and it is becoming increasingly apparent that you are not the only one with too much free time.
English is, as normal, very productive (*coughs*) we’re playing with the coloured pens, highlighters and a tri-coloured pencil, and we’ve filled a page.
And did you know that there is such a thing as a hemi-demi-semi quaver?
There are now Waldos all over the school. Anything to do with you?
I have found out that stroking your invisible beard/chin is both soothing and addictive.

Signed,

the letter writing sheep returns.
:)


(How did you get your hair done?
And how is it up in the north?
And I have one for every lesson :S that means there are 5, if you can bear to put up with that many...)


Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:10 in the evenin'
I look forward to the next four :)
What's all this about me having an affair!? Let's face it; will the question about the ninja and the Waldo ever be sorted?? I think not...
Did you still keep the amazing timetable too? I want to see the finished version.
Ahhh, English :) how is Williams? Has she commented on my absence? And what am I supposed to be doing for speaking and listening? I have no idea, as usual...
Thank you for another golden nugget of info (I’m referring to the hemi-demi-semi quaver fact here), I gather you had another productive music lesson..? ;)

I did get my hair done, imagine the colours of a pineapple (without the green) and you have the colour of my hair. And I had a LOAD hacked off. It feels so short.
The north is foggy. And cold. And hilly. Meh.

Keep fearing the name,
Big V :)


Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:33 in the evenin'
Biology
Beckie,
Don’t you think that schools should change the name of biology to herbology?
The habitat of Chihuahuas is handbags, duh!
Imagine a Chihuahua breeding with a German shepherd according to miss it’s possible. That’s what we’re doing here by the way; we’re on classification of species. Also, theoretically, a lion could cross with a house cat.
They didn’t really think about the seating arrangements, I just noticed that I am sitting next to something labelled “Biohazard”. Hmmm….
A jeep just drove past. I’m scared.
I’ve just realised, you may be extremely bored of receiving daily essays from me cunningly disguised as letters. I would stop, but then boredom would overcome me. So you get the joy of being bombarded with page after page of writing.
We’ve got to write a report on some person or other. It has to be a page long, but a double spaced page. So is it still a page long?
And you can’t escape it, because it’s due in two weeks.
I’m going to see Chicago is a week (on the 27th)!
I am SO bored.
A similarity between Chimpanzees and humans: wrinkles.
Hogwarts: I will not call Professor McGonagall a chimpanzee because “she has wrinkles”
Hogwarts again: I will not set up a water slide from my dormitory window to the lake and push first years down it.
Science is (Finally) over.
But don’t worry.
I’ll be back…

The letter writing sheep fears no-one
:)

Music comes later, and i learnt that golden nugget a while back, but was reminded of it in English. The speaking and listening malark: you need to learn about dickens for Monday.
And I got all excited when you said think pineapple. I thought you'd got drunk and dye your hair green and yellow.
And, unfortunately, Mrs Williams has not said anything about your absence.
She must not have noticed.
Yes, the amazing timetable is being kept, and it's all colour coded now. Please wait while i type this all up...
:)

Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:38 in the evenin'
I wait with baited breath.
Well, tell Williams I am…missing her lessons? Make her notice my absence! And tell Toddy I'm sorry, please.
What do I have to write the report on? I hate biology, I wish it was easier to cut class :/.
More soon, and I look forward to tomorrow's version, should be fun, because you shall be bored in RE :):) but I shall be jealous if you do speed stacking again. Remember, I always win our matches :)

Big V

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:49 in the evenin'
Drama
Beckie,
I have not opportunity to write. Drama is mildly interesting.

The letter writing sheep enjoys drama (Shock horror)
:)

(Don’t start pining too soon, I’ve got another three lessons to go... :| and the report is on some Carl person who invented our way of sorting organisms.)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 6:55 in the evenin'
Unfortunately, there will now be a short respite while I hole punch a large number of bits of paper.

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 7:09 in the evenin'
Beckie,
for some reason, we are in the food room, and are being slowly baked (gas mark 2) due to the heat in this room.
I am very hungry, and trying to decide whether my hunger pangs are due to the fact that now would be just the right time for 2nd breakfast and/or brunch.
I also feel short, as everyone else is sitting on stools, and I am not. There are too many of us for the food room’s furniture, so I ended up on a green chair from the sociology room next door.
Hogwarts: I must not bewitch chairs in the great hall to suddenly shrink while their occupants are eating/drinking.
We are doing co-ordinate geometry mixed with Pythagoras. Do you have any idea how boring that is? We’re going back to equations of lines too. How positively thrilling.
How many different types of sheep do you think there are?

The letter writing sheep destroys all numbers
:)

Cap'n Beckie Evans Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 7:27 in the evenin'
Ahh, yes, the food room is often heated that way, ingenious really. When is the right time for second breakfast? I think i just need to be put on a drip; you know what i mean..?
DT food stools < green sociology chairs. <--REMEMBER THAT.
I need to write these in Anne Carolyn when I get back home...
Did Jogee actually set us MM hw? Because if he did, that's two weeks on the trot he'll be pisseddddddddd with me. :/
Are there 6000 types of sheep? Or am I totally over-guessing things?

Big V destroys all letter writing sheep.
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 20 roundabouts 7:31 in the evenin'
Music
Beckie,
Shh! We can’t make any noise! Seems slightly counter-productive for a MUSIC class, doesn’t it?
And, as an antidote to maths, this room is freezing.
Now we’re listening back to our performances in all their majesty. Fortunately, mine wasn’t chosen. Unfortunately, Anna’s was.
Hogwarts: I will not stick post-it notes on the backs of other students.
Tom Kirby has a post-it on his back. It says “I have smelly feet”. But it’s okay, he put it there himself.
Hogwarts: I will not perform invisibility charms on all of the students in a classroom when a teacher leaves the room.
Anna says: You shouldn’t make rules you cannot keep↑
You probably shouldn’t encourage me, Beckie; it’s all your fault you’re getting 4 LARGE pages of writing (This double page spread is from my English Notebook).
I have just realised what else died with 2009; those New Year’s glasses with the 0s as eyes holes. 2010 doesn’t really work so well. You’d have to have a REALLY wide head. And 2011 wouldn’t work at all :(
Hogwarts: I will not convince the ghost band who played at Sir Nicholas’ Deathday party to play in the entrance hall on the first day of term.
Hogwarts: I am not ‘Lord Pamplefloop’
Hogwarts: Lord Voldemort is dead, and any attempts to convince the first years otherwise is against school rules.
Who do you think looks like a monkey?
You should get dreads and see how Mr. Gingell reacts to that. Then, the next day, bring in a parrot, then, slowly but surely, begin to transform your school uniform into a pirate costume.
Hogwarts: A parrot is not an accepted school pet.
Any of these worthy? If not, at least I tried.
Don’t worry Beckie; you’ll be rid of me soon. It’s not my fault I am incredibly bored.
Anna says: He just played my performance…My ears are bleeding…
Oh, ye Gods, Mr Berrige is being mildly nice…I’m scared…
I really hope we aren’t doing this for the WHOLE double lesson…Mind you, he said we’d be doing something on keyboards, which is probably even worse.
Anna says: Yes, I was rather dreading that.
Anna’s piece was in Aristocats! She rules!
Anna says: I know I do =)
However, she claims that she did not know this. Does being only subconsciously epic make her any less cool?
Anna…Drat, I forgot what I was going to put. Oh well.
I’m running out of space fast, aren’t I?
My glasses are sliding down my nose; I think they’re too big for me.
Don’t cry Beckie, you’ll see me soon.
Smile :)

The letter writing sheep vanishes once more.
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:53 in the evenin'
Physics
Beckie,
We’re in the computer room. Can’t write, teacher will notice.

The secret agent letter writing sheep.
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
R.E.
Beckie,
Adam smells like he is wearing girls’ perfume.
Do you think Ms Mason would notice if I shot myself?
Or if I shot Adam?
I agree with you, I wish I could ditch classes. No – class. RE. Or, even more specifically, this RE lesson. And I would do so with a smile and a wave.
This is, again, a mess, because I am writing while trying to hide this from both Adam and Ms Mason.
There is now a piece of cheese string flying around the room.
Shall we count sheep?
1. Normal sheep.
2. Ninja sheep.
3. Mutant sheep.
4. Ninja mutant sheep.
5. The sheep of scientific knowledge.
6. The sheep of scientific stupidity.
7. Rainbow sheep.
8. Reverse sheep.
9. White sheep.
10. Black sheep.
11. Blue sheep.
12. Harry Potter sheep.
13. Unlucky sheep.
14. Lucky sheep.
15. Gandalf sheep.
16. Batman sheep
17. Dead sheep
18. King sheep
19. Queen sheep
20. Princess sheep
21. Shot sheep
22. Secret agent sheep
23. Bookworm sheep
24. Christmas sheep
25. Halloween sheep
26. Rubber sheep
27. Chocolate sheep
28. Girly sheep
29. The good little church girl sheep
30. The sleepy sheepy
31. Chav sheep
32. Emo sheep
she’s restarted the lesson now. But 32 sheep in 5-10 minutes isn’t bad.
Mrs Williams just snuck into our lesson.
Mrs Williams just snuck out of our lesson.
33. Bodyguard sheep
34. The water slide addicts sheep
35. Pirate sheep
36. Celebrity sheep
RE is over. Would it be inappropriate to thank God?

The Letter writing sheep destroys all RE lessons.
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
PSHE
Beckie,
I’m writing up my list of sheep. I’m at 58 now, and not anywhere near being finished. Sorry if I don’t write much. In PSHE, we can do pretty much what we want.

The Letter writing sheep is not – really – writing a letter
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
PE
Beckie,
PE sucks. We didn’t do speed stacks, we did football.

The letter writing sheep is very muddy.
:(

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
RE (Again)
Beckie,
I think I’m going to spend most of this lesson adding to my list of sheep. I’m at 81.
Hogwarts: I will not dress first years up as different types of sheep.
I’ve got writers’ block at 121. Do you think that’s acceptable?
Now all I have to do is write to you. Aren’t you lucky?
As far as I can tell, we’re still doing exactly the same as we were doing at the start of the week.
I am REALLY bored. Have you got any more ideas for sheep? I’ve almost filled four big pages in two lessons. I rule. And I have too much free time. Like you.
I’ve filled four pages of my English book with sheep: 136 in all.
Between us, we could take over the world, couldn’t we?
137. Tree hugging sheep.
Hogwarts: I must not convince first years to climb the whomping willow.
I think you may already have that one. Sorry if you do.
These letters must be the highlight of your day. I mean, they remind you of ME! What else could you possibly ask for?
I should probably stop now, or I won’t have enough space for English and Maths.

The letter writing sheep has too much free time in lessons
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:54 in the evenin'
Maths
Beckie,
Maths again, Oh joy. Don’t you love the fact that you get to miss a Thursday?
We’re doing co-ordinates again. We’re supposed to answer this question:
Where do the lines y=x and y=2x+1 meet?
I’m bored.
Hogwarts: I will not call Ancient Runes ‘Algebra’ and use that as an excuse to burn all Ancient runes books.
How to irritate the Cullens: Force them to endure Algebra.
This is torture, and that, coupled with Henry complaining about not understanding after not listening, I want to shoot myself.
Oops, Henry saw that bit :S.
Not all of it though.
And his immediate thought was that I was writing my diary. In the middle of a lesson. Erm…
Bored. Exceedingly so. For future reference, do you have any ideas as to what I could do when I am bored?
We’re now doing Pythagoras in Cuboids. And it’s as thrilling as it sounds.
I feel sorry for you, having to read all this drivel. You really shouldn’t encourage me.

The letter writing sheep has found a torture method
:)

Cap'n Aven Cain Januarrrry 22 roundabouts 8:55 in the evenin'
English
Beckie,
Tasha says: A ninja has captured Aven and deformed her handwriting. I am telling you the truth about our apparently ‘boring’ school: (2 of these are true)
- Doggrell had a car-crash.
- Hannah has grown 3 legs.
- Aven is risking epilepsy to look at a ‘pretty’ video of squiggles.

Aven says: The ninja has returned me, and I now know the secret of what came first: The ninja or the Waldo. However, if I told you through writing, the paper would shrivel up, rather than reveal the secret, and, if I tried to reveal it through the internet, then all electricity on earth would spontaneously go ‘pop’ and die. And don’t get me started on if I just tried to tell you.

The enlightened letter writing sheep
:)