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Rated: E · Chapter · Biographical · #1764778
I have laid down thousands of footprints. If I went back in time?
Trophy Case
V

Public School 101

  Joyce is a self-proclaimed prophet, at least that is what I called her when she would say,“Bruce, you can’t live your life over through our child.”

    I can’t go back and change the past, nor would I want to. The questions we all ask ourselves.  If you went back in time what would be the one thing you would change. There can only be one answer, nothing. I have laid down thousands of footprints. If I went back in time one could only imagine the paradox it would create if only one-step was out of place.

    All books start as a blank piece of paper and a thought. The pages in our life will be written every second of every day, like turning to the next chapter a new adventure was in store.  This new chapter would probably have a caption at the top, in bold letters, public school 101.


    Joyce and I went through our morning routine, a cup of coffee on the back porch, followed soon after by breakfast. This morning we would start a new routine, one that made us anxious and uneasy. Imagine hanging from a cliff with all your strength, frightened by the feeling of one finger at a time losing your grip. Soon we would need to let go, and nothing or no one could stop it.


  Standing at the front door, Taran’s head moved back and forth like a spectator at a tennis match.  Placed strategically between his feet is his backpack, ready to snatch and run. His left hand hovers just above the shoulder strap. From the kitchen, his mother’s voice rang out. “Taran your breakfast is ready, leave your pack and come eat before it gets cold.” 

    “I don’t want to miss the School bus Mommy.”

    “It’s only seven-o’clock you have plenty of time to eat.”

    “Okay Mommy, I just don’t want the bus to go by.”

    “It won’t, come eat.”

    Taran finished his breakfast in record time. As he swallowed the last bite of toast he asked, “Can I go watch for the school bus?”

    “May I be excused from the table?” His mother would reply.
 
    “Yes you may Mommy.”

    “No Taran, you need to ask to be excused.”

    “Oh’ Sorry, I love you Mommy … May I be excused?”

    “Yes you may,”

    “Before you go you need to brush your teeth, love you more.”

    “Love you more Mommy, to the moon and back plus change.”

    After brushing his teeth, Taran ran back to the front door, and took up the same pose as if he had never left. Five minutes later we heard the sound of Squeaking breaks as the School Bus came to a stop in front of the house.“Mommy, Daddy, the bus is here,”

    My bride moved to the door just in front of him, swiped at his hair, and took his hand. I followed close behind; with my head turned the slightest bit sideways. I didn’t want either one of them to see the tear that was forming in my eye. Taran gave his mother a kiss and said, “Love you Mommy.”

    “Love you too Taran.”

    He took about three steps towards the bus turned and ran back to me held up his arms and said, “Sorry Daddy, almost forgot to give you a kiss.”
No longer was it necessary to hide my tears, I reached out as Taran wrapped his arms around my waist, hugged his neck and leaning down ever so slightly we exchanged kisses on the cheeks.
 
    “Okay bud, I love you, have a great Day.”

    “Love you too Daddy”

    The driver slid his window open as Taran made his way onto the bus. Joyce had moved to the edge of the road. I could only here bits and pieces of their conversation; before I reached Joyce’s side, the bus driver had slid his window shut and pulled away.
I didn’t wait for Joyce to turn towards me, curious about their conversation I started with the questions,“What were you talking about, is everything okay?”

    She didn’t turn towards me; she just stood still as the bus topped the next hill. Again, I had that pit in my stomach; I listened to the sound of the bus as it faded.  After about thirty seconds or so, I turned to my bride, with a little bit of humor in my voice.“Well dear do you want me to bring you a chair and a cup of coffee, or do you want me to get the car so we can chase the bus down?”

    “Yaw, I’ll be right here till Taran gets home.”

    “Okay dear, anyway what did the driver say?”

    “Oh, not much just said Taran would be okay.”

    “I’m sure he will have a great day at school, besides you will get to see Taran before I do.”

    In a bit of “denial fog” about this morning’s separation, I was a little lamented to think over the last six years I was so busy to relish the time I had with Taran. Althogh I knew there would come a time when I had to lower the sides of the playpen and let our boy grow.

 
    Blue cast from the florescent light over an army surplus desk. Kind of organized chaos of work tickets scattered on top. As I worked through my daily reports, my thoughts drifted from work to Taran and school. The clock on the corner of my desk read 3:45. Finally, what a long day it had been. Okay soon, any time now, the phone will ring. However, the phone did not ring. Maybe it was just anticipation that made me feel a little bit uneasy, I knew Joyce was going to call me any time now.

    I don’t think the phone rang more than one time when I grabbed it up. With my usual greeting, “This is Bruce”

    The voice on the phone sent chills throughout my body. “Ha…Hi honey, we have a problem, Taran. wasn’t on the bus.”

    “Joyce, don’t joke with me.”

    “I’m not joking; he didn’t get off the bus.”

    “Okay Joyce, call the school and I will be at your work in about five minutes.”

    I jumped up out of my chair as if it was a hot seat. Heading out of my office I felt a tug that almost spun me one eighty. Crap, I still have the receiver in my hand. I need to stay calm. I must stay calm. I took a deep breath, stepped back to my desk and hung the phone up. I took another breath and headed for my car.  The voice on the loud speaker stopped me in my tracks. “Bruce, call on line one, Bruce line one.”
I don’t have time for this, at least not now. I felt as if I were the rope in a tug of war contest, do I take the call, or just keep heading for my car. “Bruce line one.”

    “Okay…okay I heard you”

    I ran back to my office, picked up the phone.“THIS IS BRUCE”

    “Hi honey, glad I caught you before you left, they found Taran, he was asleep in the back of the bus, and I’m going to pick him up.”

    I relaxed back into my chair after hanging up the phone. I just sat there staring at the clutter on my desk.  A slight tingling throughout my body, I Felt as is a fever had just broken.


    Even today, I reflect back on Taran’s early school years. The stories he would tell us about his teachers, and his day. His trophy box was filling up with pictures he drew, and the scribbling on art paper. Three stick figures, in colored crayon, all with smiles drawn on their faces. Each picture would have words written at the top.  I love my mommy and daddy.

    My heart grew.

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