Absence

I award him master thief,
I award him Villainy of Truth.
He'll plead guilty for pleasure
As his voice tugs my heart-root.

Haunting my mind, does he know
That salt, swallowed, trails out in rivers?
From founts that were ever dry,
Over lips that ne'er quivered?

My arms hug a breath of air
That I try to breathe in but choke;
Scratching claws crawl from inside
Grinding my ears as they gloat:

"Protecting your heart?" They say,
"'I'm protecting my heart,'" they mimic
First, then shout "You sold your heart!
"For cheap words and gaudy gimmicks!"

I masquerade myself, Behold!
Eyes that hugged flesh and heart that cried blood!
Hazel-green circles that smile
And dam emotional floods.

Rosy cheeks on pale plaster
Pretend to dimple in the corners
- I use saltwater as glue -
Smiling aromatic odours.

Perhaps this hurricane is
Only a wind tousling hair and dress
Blowing nonsense in my ear
And if it is... I regress.

And my arms hug a whisp of breath.
While I wait for his return in hope,
My aching heart drums, drums, drums
To the clock I learn to cope.