What defines being beautiful.. a funny twist |
Really, who is to say that you are a beauty What makes a human being sexy or pretty Ugly, facially challenged, how dare you say that What's your standard of judging, please give me the format I can relate to you the images that the media shows to me Although it may require some extensive research in plastic surgery So if my waist isn't tiny, or my legs aren't long and built After I indulge in this ice cream, should my bones rattle with guilt Plus those cookies with sprinkles look endearing to my soul But if I have one of those, then I may grow a big ugly mole! Oh no, I cant risk the chance of such horror taking place Excuse me for one second, while I inject botox into my face Or should I take a tan because some idiot says I am too light Or bleach my darkened skin to make it just a little more white It truly puzzled me, that now you would choose to speak about geico Silly me, I heard wrong, you meant the money you saved was for lipo My hair was never long and black and flowing in the wind So I choose to hire the services of chemicals just to give it a little spin Now someone call the doctor, or the hotline for hair emergency For now my precious grains are falling off, with no scant courtesy I used to believe my arse was too big, but what really confused me Were the self conscious boppers, stuffing their bras and undy And then I would slouch my back, because too tall I would feel Despite the fact that short girls were hovering in 6 inch heels Beauty pageants were my favorite shows, but one problem I suppose None of the girls who ever won, had a funny looking nose So maybe I should starting saving money to straighten this facial sin Or I can always choose the alternative, clasp it with a clothing pin So you see my predicament, I just can't decide What would make me more attractive, so I could finally be a bride Instead of being a bridesmaid all of the dam time I'd finally catch him, that future husband of mine Or maybe I can just say screw it and simply be me And love this body I possess for eternity No more trying to live up to standards that others deem to set It would sure save me alot of money, really, wanna bet? |