THE MAGIC BEHIND. A FEW TAROT CARDS

Almost twenty years ago, I chanced upon a deck of cards called the Tarot. Through reading a few books, I found the interpretation of cards quite fascinating, Unfortunately, because of schedules marred by work and never-ending fits of frenetic activities during weekends, I never got to master the mystical cards.

This year 2011, I had my second kidney transplant, one of the more difficult ordeals I had to encounter in life. The transplant used up our entire life savings, not to mention an earlier tragedy in 2009 where a typhoon hit our country which resulted in the loss of our ancestral home where I had lived for 40 years. We bought a house for my mother and I started to finance my own condominium.

By the time the transplant came, I just had about enough to sustain my needs for the operation which unfortunately took a turn for the worse because my kidney encountered rejection.

During the recovery period, I accepted writing jobs and other types of jobs which allowed me to work at home. I conducted research, and the one thing that kept me company all throughout these dungeon days were a deck of Tarot cards.

Unknown to me, the deck I bought was called Liber T which initially, I found quite obscene due to some artwork. Later, in the midst of my research, I realized the deck I got was a version of the famous Thoth Tarot, developed by Aleister Crowley. When I researched on each card's meaning, I felt a richness of spirit and life come back to me.

I had to ask questions on how I could recover my confidence, my finances, my self-esteem, and my spirit which was downtrodden because of the rejection I had encountered as epitomized by my kidney. Surprisingly enough, researching on each card helped me to build insight sourced from a variety of disciplines and topics -- medieval philosophy, Jungian psychology, Pagan oracle studies, ancient Egyptian history and myths, and even partly the I Ching,

THE SIGNIFICANT CARDS IN MY LIFE

THE FOOL.

He is a character in green, and unlike in other Tarot cards where he is about to jump from a cliff, my FOOL has already taken the plunge. The Fool is the daring spirit in the individual. In spite of the dangers that lurk below as symbolized by the crocodile, the fool starts his descent into what others see is a river of death. In ancient Egypt, the Nile River was known as the River of life because it ensured that the land was fertile. However, the Nile also stood for danger and death because of the crocodiles that reveled in it. The Fool is a reminder of the need to sometimes take a leap of faith, get out of the usual way of living and launch oneself into a sea of adventure. Whenever the Fool emerges amidst a life filled with torrent, it simply is a wake-up call that it may be wise to change location, take the plunge, and although there is the usual possibility of danger on one side of life, there also lies an equal opportunity for freedom on the other side.

THE MAGUS.

He is the magician of resources. The elements of life are the very symbolism which under lie the Tarot - earth, air, fire and water. And the magus holds the key to using these elements to the fullest. He is the resource mobilizer, the alchemist and the manipulator of things present and future, gifted with the wisdom of the past. The Magus knows the art of making changes, and the science of making things happen. When the Magus appears in the best of times and in the worst of times, he has the power to inspire one to use all the elements -- all his gifts, everything and anything he can lay his hands on to structure events to happen in his favor. He is the creator of phenomenon that will lead to either success or failure, joy or pain, blessedness or evil. The Magus is bright and brilliant, and in being so, he can will the greatest heroic occurrences to happen in life ... but if he is in his shadow state, he may also manipulate with the same energy and transform events into portents of doom.

THE CHARIOT.

He is the driver of life. Young, dynamic, energetic and vibrant, the charioteer has the capacity to rein in the polarities of life as symbolized by the colors of the horses -- black and white. He does not yet have the full wisdom and the structured mindset of the Emperor. Nor does he still possess the wisdom of the Hermit who is at the sage level. Neither is he in the sublimely hanging calm state of the Hanged Man. The Charioteer is young and his youth drives him to boldness and draws in him the desire to win. He is focused, goal-driven and and straightforward. He knows the path to winning and will drive his chariot towards that direction.

THE DEVIL.

He is the force that reminds people of the wealth and experience of temptation. Wealth is the devil's tool for temptation. The world is the way it is because of the lure of riches... and yet, the devil is also the teacher of experience. He tells you that resistance is futile because you will always want what he is willing to give -- riches, power, freedom. Of the three, freedom is the most interesting. While freedom is what every person aims for, too much of this can also wield bad results. When Eve was tempted by the serpent, it was inferred that if she ate the fruit from the Tree, she would know the difference between good and evil, right and wrong ... such knowledge was supposedly just reserved for God. Maybe, if we think about it, the Devil is not really the bad person we thought him to be. Temptation opens our eyes to the reality of what is right or wrong. Because if there was only good, we will be ignorant evil ... and the lack of knowledge of evil is the lack of wisdom. It is pure bliss without ever having felt a sense of meaning. When we succumb to tempation, we then realize the consequences of our acts and blame no one but ourselves. It was once said ... the devil's biggest trick is to let the world think he does not exist.

THE TOWER.

Often seen as the Tower of Babel, this card is symbolic of changes of cataclysmic proportions. The Tower is cracked and lightning strikes, and people fall from the tower. The card suggests omens of change which are upcoming, usually upheaval-type in nature and more often caused by external forces. The card can be a representation of major changes that will be wreaked upon a person, and it is up to the person to deal with these. The tower is challenge in itself, it represents the reality that we cannot be in full control of situations because there are forces that create tremendous events that affect our life. Amidst the order we struggle to create, it is inherent in nature to cause turmoil and pandemonium so that we will be compelled to change the way we think.

DEATH

The Death card is often viewed with fear. And yet, Death is not something one should be afraid of. When the Death card emerges, it is a symbolism for the fading away of one phase in life and the beginning of another. It may be an event, a feeling, an idea, or anything that follows the cycle of life and death. Death is transition, often to one something better than where one is. While there may be an experience of loss, there is also the promise of hope and new beginnings.


THE MAGIC INSIGHTS I GOT

These were the cards that influenced my days of recovery. I realized that I have very often lived a Fool's life -- playful, creative, dangerous and adventurous. These were also the very reasons I compromised my health which I now deeply regret. However, when I look back, I realize I am not sorry because I wouldn't have gained wisdom if i also did not plunge in. Every mistake I made as a fool gave me lessons which only sages would have talked about. Every wound I needed to heal in my heart taught me that I can change my mindset to cause a healing in my soul. I may no longer make the mistakes made by a Fool, but I would still surely retain the spirit of taking a leap of faith, of being creative, or trying out new things and taking risks to learn more lessons --- but this time, with more wisdom.

As a Magician, the most important lesson learned is that I am the creator of my life. If I caused problems as a Fool, the Magician in me can help me find the resources to solve any situation. Indeed, the Tarot has taught me how to refocus my business by reshaping my mindset. The moment this happened, my behaviors changed. And the moment my behaviors changed, I realized a new life, a new me started to unfold. I have higher energy than ever. More ideas and inspiration to create something new in anything I do.

The Chariot has taught me the importance of driving myself towards a goal, towards winning, not over others, but over myself ... breaking my own records, outdoing my last performance. The Chariot is the youth in me which I need to rein in and refocus so that I am able to drive the wholistic aspect of my personality towards one new direction which I have set myself for.

The Devil is the one whom I will always listen to for warnings, and instead of ignoring the warnings of temptations and pretend they don't exist, I will recognize that there are always possible consequences to whatever choices I make -- and while I may not be able to fully control the consequences, at least, I can still control my choices.

The Tower and Death cards will always be coming out every time I face the day-to-day upheavals of life. If there was a lesson I have learned across time, if I want to create a change in my situation and in others, i first need to crack my own tower, survive my own death ... and learn from it. I need to change myself within.


Now after 7 months, I find myself gradually going back into the groove. The Magic of the cards have become alive ... what was once purely a storehouse of insights sourced from a deck of cards has now become lessons lived with meaning and purpose. Indeed, the magic of the cards lie not in the artwork, nor the generic meanings. Their enchantment lies in their ability to bring out one's unconscious thoughts, to surface them as the waves of the ocean would wash away the sand to reveal the glitter of the shoreline, and make one's inner wisdom take over one's life.