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Rated: E · Short Story · Fanfiction · #1828633
Whimsical play with morals and values. Adults who think they know what is best
Roger Dodger and Larry Clary decided to go fishing at the water hole.  It was a hike to get to it, and the quickest way was across Miss Dowdy-Bloomers backyard.  The long way was through Mr Hasbeen’s ferret farm, down a narrow path past the cattle yard.  Roger Dodger and Larry Clary decided to take the long route. They were half way up the track near Mr Hasbeen’s farm when Larry Clary noticed Mr Hasbeen racing around the paddock on his four wheeler tractor, at full speed.
“Why is Mr Hasbeen racing around the paddock?” queried Rodger Dodger.
“I don’t know?” said Larry Clary curiously. “Let’s find out”
“Hi there Mr Hasbeen, why are you racing around your paddock like that?” said Roger Dodger frowning.
“Well howdy, Roger Dodger and Larry Clary.  I’m racing against the wind on me new four wheel tractor. It runs better than me old three wheeler, but I aint beaten the wind yet. So, ya headin’ up the water hole?” giggled Mr Hasbeen.
“Yep.  It’s a good day for fishing. We didn’t want to upset Miss Dowdy-Bloomers so we thought we’d go through your farm if that’s alright with you,” smiled Larry Clary.
“Well I’m sorry, but that path’s not there anymore. We had an earthquake last month, and a week ago we had a flood. The earthquake swallowed up the path and the flood washed the rest away. There’s a stream now.  For some reason the cattle and sheep stay away from it. I don’t know why though. It’s the sweetest tasting water ever,” said Mr Hasbeen as he flicked his tongue.  “Miss Dowdy-Bloomers is away visiting her sister so you two gentlemen should be safe cutting through there,” dribbled Mr Hasbeen.
“If we cut through the thicket there we’ll be at her place in a jiffy, right Mr Hasbeen?” surmised Larry Clary.
“That’s right. Stay to the left though, I set a couple of traps.  Strange creatures around. Well me ferrets are due for their afternoon meal. They do get a bit tetchy if I’m late.”
Mr Hasbeen skipped off to his farm leaving his four wheel tractor still running. Roger Dodger and Larry Clary headed towards Miss Dowdy-Bloomers, carefully checking for any traps still lying about.  When they reached Miss Dowdy-Bloomers, Larry Clary scouted the yard while Roger Dodger checked the house. Then they headed towards the waterhole. When they got there, they noticed the water hole was much bigger.
Roger Dodger looked into the water and was surprised at what he saw. He motioned for Larry Clary to look. They were amazed at the scene.  There were sparkly pebbles on the bottom of the water hole, and it was filled with the strangest looking fish.
They both stared in awe watching the weird fish swim by.  There was an orange and mauve angel fish with flippers, a rainbow trout with a moustache, and a purple and orange seahorse with a black hat. Larry Clary peered closer.  Roger Dodger’s face was almost touching the water. The fish were staring at Larry Clary and Roger Dodger staring at them.  Suddenly a purple puffer fish the size of a golf ball with rubber balls on its tips popped its head above the water and spoke.
“Excuse me Sirs, my name is Oswald Peabody Gooberling. Would you two mind stepping back a bit. You might slip and fall in and you really don’t want to do that.”
Both Roger Dodger and Larry Clary fell backwards landing with a great thud on their large butts. If Roger Dodger’s eyes were any bigger they would pop out of his head. As for Larry Clary his eyes did pop out of their sockets anyway, so it made no difference.
“Thank you” said Oswald Peabody Gooberling. He then puffed up to the size of a basketball, turning yellow as he did a spin.  He flapped his fins, let out a high pitched squeak, somersaulted, and sploshed into the water returning to his normal small size and colour.
Both men stared at each other, stunned.  Larry Clary shuffled up the bank. As for Roger Dodger he was not so lucky.  As he went to move he lost his footing and slid into the water. As soon as he hit the water he began to transform into a blue and yellow striped snapper with gumboot fins. Larry Clary got a fright and tried to scramble quickly away but lost his footing rolling in head first. He transformed into a pink and green groper with a tail like a fan.  Oswald Peabody Gooberling appeared once more.
“You didn’t listen. I did warn you.” Oswald Peabody Gooberling swished off and disappeared behind a wall of black silt.
A shiny pink and green tuna with blue eyes and purple fins wearing diamond earrings approached Roger Dodger and Larry Clary.
“Silly fools, silly fools, you should’ve listened.”
She swam a full circle around Roger Dodger and Larry Clary, bubbling a gurgly giggle and swam off after Oswald Peabody Gooberling.
Roger Dodger and Larry Clary stared in bewilderment. Suddenly the fish began disappearing behind the black silt.  The pool became dark. Roger Dodger looked up. He could just make out an image over the water hole.
“Hey, what the.......blub, blub, blub
“What a lovely couple you are.  A gumboot finned snapper and a fantail groper, my favourite.  You will definitely add to my rubber-bird. I hope you are as enjoyable as you are colourful. What a wonderful catch,” giggled Miss Dowdy-Bloomers.
She carried her prize catch inside. Roger Dodger and Larry Clary flipped and flopped about in the bottom of the net, desperately gasping for air.
“My you’re a lively bunch, and no ears I see.  No wonder you’re here.  Miss Dowdy-Bloomers shook her head at her fish out of water.
Roger Dodger and Larry Clary finally realised Miss Dowdy-Bloomers was not all she appeared to be. They also realised they were the main course for dinner.
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