powerful dream

this night i learned something about myself and human beings. I was dreaming and i woke up chocked and scarred still feeling the knife scratching against my bone. The lesson about this dream was. I could never kill myself as long as my family is alive. in fact i would never do it even if they die. the shame would be to strong to break threw. To kill yourself is the most selfish thing you ever can do. when people tell me about their times when they have try to end it i dont feel compassion for them. i just see a selfish lesser being that i would not thrust. if they dont tell me also tell me about their enlightenment that i just had.