My Life And Everything Part 1

Hi people!
Here's just some random writing about me, my daily life etc I'd say.

Well..I sometimes just feel so unhappy or like not happy at all
It's like...how should I say when you see me smiling or laughing, actually in my heart I just don't feel well, happy or something I'm not sure, hahas.

Also, my family's been experiencing financial problems few years back already, so they borrowed money from my relatives but because they've failed to return the payment back to them, now most of them is reluctant to lend. My parents borrowed money, not because to pay their gambling debts or what, it's just like normal utilities bills etc.
Well you see only my father's supportiing our family of 4, my mother can't work because of her poor health condition.
Hence, problems like this started arising here and there.

On the other hand, I love music alot and maybe I'd consider saying that it's my passion.
I've been wanting to learn the piano since young, but well you already know the circumstances that I'm in so it's hard. You all might say to learn online, okay that's alright but I need to sort of get a hands-on or practice on a piano.
Unfortunately, my parents can't afford so I'm just hoping that one day I'm able to do so.
Right now my school has this activity of learning the Chinese Zither, so I get to learn it for free, hahas..

Well..right now I think that's about all!
To be continued, maybe? If I find the time to do so.

OK lastly, let me make clear of this, ME WRITING THIS, I AM NOT OUT TO GET SYMPATHY FROM ANYBODY OR ANYTHING, just me sharing my problems and my life.
I have to make this clear I don't wish to see comments saying that I'm out to get sympathy or anything.
Sorry for the caps lock.