I learnd from the story of Lots Wife

They say that moving is way up there on the scale of stressors, along with death and divorce. well a couple of summers ago, I got them all. We moved from California to Washington State. My husband had just retired. So now instead of him going off to work every day, he's home every day, like an overgrown kid, sitting on my couch, just lieing around wanting my attention all the time.

While we were in the process of moving, my daughter-in-law died. She was only 26 years old. She got very sick and also got MRSA and just couldn't get over it, and she died in an ambulance on her second trip to the hospital. She left behind a 6 year old little girl. My son now was in the fight of his life with his in-laws for the custody of his own daughter. He lost, because lawyers are corrupt. the grandparents lyed. They made up stories about my son. Also they had money for lawyers and my son, nor I did. so I came to realize that it really is all about money, and if you don't have an abundence, then your out of luck.

So, you see, in a short time, I had several of these top of the line stressors, and on top of that, I had my own healty issues. And now, I am in a strange state with absoultly no one that I know. I found my self reaching back into my life in California, instead of reaching forward into my new life here in Washington state. I went to CA to visit and learned in a short years time, everything that was familiar was gone. My art teacher had moved, the pastor of my church had retired, several friends had either moved or changed in ways I wasn't gonna be with them anyhow, so even if I moved back, it wouldn't be the same. So I was really, really stuck, in the middle of my life.

God does wispper in still small voices. and those who know HIM hear and reconize his voice. I have been fighting with God for over two years now. But, if you know what I mean, you know, there is NO FIGHTING WITH GOD.
God speaks to us in several ways, through his word, and through other people just to name a couple. I had an interesting thing happen to me. I kept calling old friends, family and looking to those left behind in CA to keep me feeling like I had a life.Little by little these people faded from my life. I got deeper and deeper into depression which I could not handle. Slowly God kept nudging me to make new friends, go new places and leave the past behind me. I resisted. I am not eaisly open to new places or things or even new people. I suffer social phoeba, depression and low self esteme. But one day I went to a bible vrs that told the story of Lots wife. I am not well versed in exactly where it was, but enough of it came through to me that I got the point. God told her to go to a new place and not to look back. When she disobeyed and looked back, she turned into a pillar of salt.

My lesson was that I was not to look back at my old life. This dosn't mean that I cannot keep in touch with old friends or family. Of course not, God dosn't expect that, HE just wants me to look forward in my life, to find the new things he has planned for me. He says he has a plan and a future for me. How will I find it if I am laying around dwelling on what I left in my past in California? I won't. I am to go out and find it here, in my new place.