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365 Stories contest. This is everything I write for it compiled in one entry, how useful. |
CHAPTER #1, January 1, 2012 Every good story starts with a "goodbye". I figured this out my sophomore year of high school, standing on my front porch, watching him drive away in his white minivan. The heavy feeling of that farewell still hung in the air as I walked inside. I knew, though, that somewhere out there, however far away, was a new beginning, an adventure just waiting to find me. "BEEP, BEEP, BEEP!" My alarm never got more pleasant, no matter how many first days of school passed. I groaned as I swung my feet out of bed, hitting the off button on my alarm clock. I sleepwalked to the bathroom to get ready for my first day of my sophomore year. Somehow, I always started something new with that hopeful outlook that something exciting might happen. Of course, that "something exciting" didn't always take place, but hey, no harm in hoping. This particular day was no exception, but I was not looking forward to starting school again. I knew what waited me when I walked in the door. My ex-boyfriend, Spanish class, and a lot of other junk that I didn't want to mess with. School almost always seemed to start a week early for me. Band camp was always the week before school started, and it was worse than school. Don't get me wrong. I loved marching band, but band camp is always the worst week of the summer. It was hot, long, and a good way to look bad in front of all your friends and the drumline guys. See, with marching band, there was a distinct hierarchy of sections. It was almost cliquey in a way, but people were nicer. On top was the drum major, and just below her, the drumline. Then came the guard, the tubas, the flutes, the clarinets, the low brass, and the pit kids. I was smack dab in the middle of it all, a flute player by heart. Drumline always thought they were too cool for school and the guard girls were always the drama queens of the group. Naturally, we were all some of the best kids I knew. We didn't get drunk, we didn't get in a whole lot of trouble, and we generally had decent grades. The bus pulled up in front of my stop this morning, menacing as ever. Its roaring exhaust system sputtered and smelled just like previous years. I climbed into its yellow belly and sat down next to my best friend Isabelle. We started talking about the upcoming year. I was still a little shaken from my break-up with Ryan a few days previous, and found myself shaking at the thought of having to sit next to him in Spanish. I knew with my luck, that would happen. When we arrived at the school, kids started piling out of the buses. The inside of the school smelled of new notebooks, hairspray, and perfume. First day fever had struck. I waved to acquaintances that I hadn't seen all summer long, wondering if I looked how I felt. I was torn up on the inside, crying had become a regular activity. It was the first time I had come to school without a boyfriend in two years. Isabelle and I walked to our lockers as usual. We didn't know why, it wasn't like there was anything in them that we could possibly need on the first day of school. We passed the kids we usually did, and the familiarity of the routine was reassuring. Things had changed, but maybe not too much. As we approached the table we usually stationed ourselves at before school, my insides quivered. I knew that he would be there. To my surprise, only a few seconds after we sat down, Isabelle suggested we go and visit people in the band room. I was slightly relieved at the idea of getting away from the awkward silence that had surrounded our group. "Katie!" Isabelle shrieked as we came up to the band room door. "Is, Emma, how are you doing?" she smiled. The three of us swapped summer stories as we walked into the band room. Several people were clustered in different areas of the room. We talked until the bell rang. First period physical education wasn't exactly a good thing, but we managed. The day trailed slowly on from there. Teachers handed out syllabuses, promised a good year, and gave us a homework assignment. Nothing exciting had happened yet. Nobody in my classes looked like potential homecoming dance dates, and I was dreading fifth period. I walked into my Spanish classroom nervously, books in hand. I sat down on the exact opposite side of the room from Ryan, hoping he wouldn't wave or nod or say a word to me. I was avoiding eye contact, even as my new teacher, Señora Rubenstein, rambled about doing a "buen trabajo" in her class in Spanish. I found myself staring out the window wistfully the rest of the day, wishing 11:20 would come a little faster. The bell finally rang, and I remembered I had to be back at the school in a few hours for marching band rehearsal. Isabelle and I took our dogs for a walk and carpooled to the rehearsal later that evening. When I pulled open the band room door, walking inside with my head down, I didn't have the chance to notice the bass drum coming straight towards me. I fell right over when I made contact and was laughed at when the owner, Noah Blake, passed by. He offered his hand to help me up, still laughing at me, and I promptly thanked him by refusing it and getting myself to my feet alone. "Maybe next time you should look where you're going, Red," he laughed. "First off, don't call me 'Red', it's Emma, and maybe you should make sure there's no one in front of you while you're walking." I turned and walked away to get my instrument. Isabelle was smiling at me in the locker room. I gave her a glare. "What?" "Noah Blake, huh? That's one guy I wouldn't want to accidentally make a fool of myself in front of." Isabelle was still smiling. I knew that. We both, being stupid girls, had ranked the drumline guys on one of our walks earlier that summer. Noah had been in the top three. Marching band was a great way to embarrass yourself, and knowing me, that could happen many times before the year was over. 1/2/12 Dancing and twirling Fluttering and swirling Butterflies and blushing cheeks Eyes that whisper Fairytales and funny looks Romance movies and reading books You and I we're meant to be 1/3/12 (continuation of 1/1/12) We were still marking off dots and finding our places on the field that week. Quite naturally, one of my dots was right in between my ex-boyfriend, Ryan, and the extremely pretty girl he dumped me for. I continued to avoid eye contact throughout the rehearsal. The part of the show we were working on never seemed to be good enough for my director, as he kept calling "reset" for an hour at least. I found the tears pricking at the backs of my eyes. I held my poise, however, and was relieved when my director said, "go find your next dot." Isabelle gave me looks of sympathy. Noah Blake hadn't forgotten about our little accident earlier that evening. He kept smiling smugly at me if he accidentally caught my eye. I only glared in return, my face as red as my hair. When I was collecting my belongings in the locker room after rehearsal, he came up to me, poked me in the side, and continued walking. Of course, I jumped almost three feet in the air and squealed in surprise. He turned his head in visible pleasure at my reaction. No, I told myself, catching my angry feet nearly stomping after him. Don't let him get to you, he's not worth your time. Isabelle was waiting in the car for me. "What happened?" she said, noticing the scowl on my face. "Noah. That's what happened." "Ah... I see," she cooed, winking. "What? He's obnoxious." "And completely hot." "Yeah, that too. But too annoying." "What did he do this time?" "Poked me in the side. He barely knows me." "Yikes," she giggled. I only glared at her. "Oh, come on, live a little," she sighed. I guess she was partially right. I hadn't really done much living in my fifteen years of being alive. In my mind, fun was a game of scrabble with my mom. The only boyfriend I'd ever had was a strict rule follower like myself, besides the fact that I "dated" him in middle school and my freshman year. Isabelle and I both knew that those were the most innocent years of my life. I could be a little more out there if I tried. The thing that kept me from my rebellious destiny? I was terribly afraid of being hurt again. Ever since I was little, I was shy and reserved. Teachers wrote "needs to participate more" on my report cards and some kids even gasped when I answered a question, as if saying, "I didn't know she was in this class!" Middle school had shrunk my self-esteem and high school was treating me pretty roughly. Being dumped had only added to my scarred heart, and I could feel a slow ripping in the already opened wounds. Being made fun of in the sixth grade started it all. The boys in my classes taunted and the girls could kill you with their eyes. Isabelle knew me better than anyone I had ever met. Maybe she was right. "See you later! Thanks, Mrs. McHenry, for the ride home," she said, waving as she got out of the car. I waved back, wondering how this year would turn out. It held so many secrets that I couldn't wait to find out. I lay awake in bed that night thinking about school and life in general. I wondered if I should dye a streak of purple into my hair, maybe get a feather extension? Important things like that only could be thought of at ten thirty at night in bed. I felt myself drifting off finally at eleven. That night I had a very bizarre dream. It was all mixed up in my head. I found myself talking to some of my favorite book characters about Noah. They told me that he wasn't worth my time and told me to live a little, then began to morph into Isabelle. After they were Isabelle, they ran away from me laughing. I walked away, curious as to why ten of my best friend had been laughing at me, and ran straight into the bass drum of my ex-boyfriend Ryan. I didn't even stop to wonder why he was carrying a bass drum, as he was a low brass player, but I started punching him, until he turned into the girl he dumped me for that ended up being my pillow when I woke up in a sweat. It was only three in the morning. I still had two hours to sleep. My alarm woke me up at five thirty. I hit the snooze button without thinking, and found myself rolling out of bed at six. I told my mom I needed a ride to school, knowing that I would miss the bus. She groaned but grabbed the keys at seven to drive me to the worst place on earth. Isabelle was waiting by my locker in the morning. I shrugged off her question as to why I hadn't been on the bus. "Boy, you missed a lot," she said. "Noah Blake was telling some guy about how you think you're too cool for your own socks and the guy laughed in agreement." I snorted. "He doesn't even know a thing about me." She nodded. "I know. He's such a stupid guy, and a flirt. I mean seriously, he was so flirting with you when he poked you." "I try not to think about it that way." "Why not? He's pretty cute." "Nah, he's got a big head." The bell rang and we went to physical education, wondering if Noah Blake's head could explode if his ego got any more massive. 1/4/12 (continuation of 1/3/12) Two words. Physical education. Those two words, when you look them up in the thesaurus, are found to be synonyms of the words "death" and "torture". When looked up on the internet, related words found could possibly be "puke" or "embarrassment". I knew that as soon as I walked into my second day of sophomore physical education. My teacher was mean. Isabelle had immediately uttered, "man lady", as soon as we saw my teacher the day before. Mrs. Hutchinson was tall, burly, and had an ugly evil face that said "pushups" as soon as you walked in. All the girls in my class realized that this year would not be a good year for looking pretty, considering sweat would cover your body before you got to a class that had people in it who mattered. We started out the day doing push-ups and sit-ups, approximately fifty each. My arms felt like jelly, and the abs I didn't have could barely support my body anymore. After finishing that "warm-up", we went outside to the track to run a mile in under eight minutes or fail. I failed, naturally, because my body wasn't in shape enough to handle a mile when I hadn't run since June. Besides that, I couldn't have done it in June either. I'm not an athletic person, unlike Isabelle. She must have passed by me at least five times while we were running. After I was done, I had a vision of throwing up in the bathroom. Unfortunately, the cruel mind of my teacher had cooked up a plan to make my vision a reality. We still had at least twenty five minutes in the class period, which was to be spent running another two miles if we had failed to achieve the eight minute standard. After three quarters of the first of the two miles, I could feel the bile rising in my throat. On lap five, my breakfast showed up in the grass next to the track and on my shoes. Mrs. Hutchinson scowled when she saw me walking back towards her. I told her I'd thrown up and she called Isabelle over to take me to the nurse. "What happened to you?" she said, clearly grossed out by the leftovers on my shoes. "I'm not in shape enough to run three miles in a row with Mrs. Hutchinson yelling at me the whole time." I tried to explain to the nurse that no, I did not have the stomach flu. She disagreed, but then she realized that I might be correct when my temperature showed up as normal. "I'm going to send you home, anyways. You don't look like you feel very good at all." I sighed in relief and thanked her for her efforts. I asked Isabelle to pick up any assignments I missed and to bring them over. My mom wasn't very pleased to see me when she picked me up. I had interrupted her yoga class when the nurse called, which was the only way she kept sane with me and my siblings in the house. Zane, my youngest brother, drove her crazy. Thankfully, he was at preschool in the mornings. She vowed to call the school and tell them how awful physical education classes were. I simply told her that me being out of shape wasn't exactly the best argument either. We got home, and I was happy to relax while I was still nauseous. I spent the afternoon reading silly romances, not even thinking once about Noah Blake. Of course, my lovely day post- nausea was ruined right after school ended. Isabelle came to drop off my homework, but also brought a few other things with her. I was only slightly surprised to hear that she had a few stories for me, mainly because she always did. What was really surprising was that they were half about me. The other half of them were about Noah Blake. "Noah was wondering where you were in band. He knows that I'm friends with you, so he came up to me and asked me. He gave me this note for you, then later this one." I opened the first note and read it out loud so Isabelle could hear it too. "'To Emma'," I read. "'If you hear any rumors that I'm a player, don't listen to them. They're not true. I'm not really sure why I'm writing this note. Maybe it's because I can't stop thinking about how you basically run me over the other day. If you ever decide to apologize, my number is 626-386-9710.'" Isabelle and I sat there with our mouths hanging open. I wasn't sure what to do or say next. "Open the next one," Isabelle said urgently. I only stared at it. "Open it!" she urged. I slowly brought my fingers to the edges, unfolded it slowly, and began to read it aloud. "'Dear Emma, so you have to be sick the day I decide to write you a note. Gee thanks. I hope you feel better, please write me a note back.'" "Are you going to?" Isabelle asked. "I don't know...should I?" "Okay. Here's your situation. A hot guy just gave you his number via cute note and asked for one in reply. Of course you should!" "But, I don't even know if I like this kid or not." "Who cares, he's hot!" Isabelle had good reasoning. "But I don't want to seem too eager." "So reply in a few days, I can even deliver it if you really want." I agreed to write it and give it to her to deliver to him on Thursday. She decided to stay to help me write it. We sat for at least twenty minutes just discussing if I should give him my number or not. I decided not to after realizing that giving him my number would lead to texting conversations I wasn't sure I really wanted to have. Noah Blake, however cute his blue eyes, needed to prove to me that he deserved my number. I didn't want to waste any more of my time on him than I already had. I wrote it in my signature sparkly green pen and gave it to Isabelle. She left, leaving me alone with my thoughts and the accumulating pile of homework by my bed. I couldn't concentrate on the algebra problems laid out in front of me on my bed. When my mom called me down to dinner, I only barely ate my soup. Some could argue it was the nausea from earlier, but I would say it was an unknown disease called Noah Blake. 1/5/12 The following morning, I rolled out of bed and went to school. I could only imagine what could possibly happen today. The pages of my sophomore year hadn't exactly been filled with good times yet. Luckily, today was a book day in physical education, so I didn't have to worry about throw up being on my list of things to do. Isabelle was excited to see me. "Emma... can't we just give him the note today!" "No! No we can't. I don't want to seem like I care." "Okay... well today is Wednesday... so tomorrow I will give it to him." "Just make sure I'm not around. I'd rather not have any commentary on my note while I'm there," I laughed. "Yeah I know right. Emma, I love your outfit today by the way." I guess I didn't look too bad. I was wearing a blue cotton t-shirt dress with some cute shoes and a belt. In fact, I felt pretty good today. That nice day of rest had helped my mood, and it sure wasn't a bad thing that I got a cute guys number without asking for it. That sure could boost a person's ego. Even so, I was dreading band that day. I didn't really want another confrontation with Noah Blake. He had been on my mind too much already. I most definitely didn't need him to talk to me today. When third period rolled around, I was beyond ready for the day to be over. I was tired and not in the mood for Noah Blake's face. Lucky for me, Ryan was in second period band, not third like me. Unfortunately, Noah was in the same class as me, which meant only one thing, teasing. I walked into the locker room with Isabelle and our friend, Olivia. Isabelle was going after some guy in her art class whose name was Corbin. He had these dreamy green eyes and blonde hair. For Isabelle to be chasing him, he had to be fairly muscular as well. Isabelle had very high standards. We were laughing about this when we walked into the locker room, Olivia pretending to be Corbin and asking Isabelle out. Isabelle was blushing and laughing hysterically. I was dying next to her when I felt a tap on my shoulder. "Hey, Red. " Noah. Blake. "Um. Hi," I said, looking down at my flower covered flats. "Where you been?" "I wasn't feeling so hot yesterday." "I'm sure you looked hot yesterday..." He continued hitting on me, and I saw one of the guard girls out of the corner of my eye, staring at me with jealous eyes. "Uh, you're pretty forward," I told him. He laughed. "I gotta go get ready to play," I said, turning my back on him and walking away. Olivia asked me about him later, and so did half the other girls in band. I wasn't really sure what to answer when they asked me if he liked me or not. I knew exactly what to answer when they asked me if I liked him. "Absolutely not," I told Olivia. "Why? He's so cute...and a junior." "Yeah, well he's just a flirt is all. He doesn't actually like me. He just likes flirting." In my head though, I wasn't so sure. Telling myself that he was just a flirt would save me from further pain, that's what I decided in the end. Isabelle was still stunned that I hadn't acted on his flirting. She was wondering if I could possibly just be playing hard to get. I told her that no, I wasn't. I just wasn't interested. "Keep on telling yourself that. You know he likes you and you just don't want to admit that you pretty much like him too." "He doesn't even know me," I argued, but it was no use. She kept insisting that I was just lying to myself. The day continued moving normally. It was actually going fairly well, especially in comparison to yesterday. What I really didn't understand was how easily I had gotten through fifth period. Ryan hadn't said a word to me since two days before school started. I was glad too. Could it be possible that I was finally getting over him? I hoped so. I knew something had to go wrong, however. A day didn't pass where Emma McHenry didn't get embarrassed at least once. In the seventh grade, I did something stupid almost every day. I was a complete klutz. I was going up the stairs one day, carrying a big pile of my books. I fell right up the stairs and my books went flying. I looked up to see a big group of the popular guys of my grade snickering at me. I got up quickly and continued walking with my head down to my next class, which only resulted in a collision with one of my teachers. I needed to learn to look where I was going. Today, I hadn't gotten embarrassed yet. Noah hadn't even done anything to me that made me blush. I was determined to remain unembarrassed by the end of the day. My wish was almost granted, until the bell rang after eighth period. I was walking to the music playing in the hallway after school. I felt good, and actually pretty hot too. I felt so good that I was looking up and not at my toes for once in my life. My straight red hair was flowing behind me. I had a half smile on my face that said "I know something you don't" and I was waving to people I knew as I passed them. Without a single warning, I slipped on an invisible puddle of water and somehow managed to do the splits. I was quite startled and was not happy to find that a very good-looking guy was walking behind me. He almost laughed but stopped himself long enough to ask if I was okay and to help me up. "I'm fine, thanks," I said, letting him help me up. Then, I saw him. Noah. He was standing right across the hallway at his locker, laughing and looking right at me. I wanted to slap myself for being so stupid. I gained my composure and put on an award winning smile for the cute guy that had just helped me up. "That water just came out of nowhere," I laughed. I snuck a look at Noah. He was staring at the guy, almost enviously. "Yeah, that's happened to me before," he said. "What's your name? I'm Luke." "I'm Emma, are you a sophomore?" "Yeah, I am. Are you?" "Yeah, funny, I've never seen you before." "That's probably because I just moved here this year." "Probably!" I continued to walk and talk with him until we got to our buses. I found out he had moved from Colorado. He talked about how nice it always is to meet a fellow red head. I only laughed and smiled most of the time. He said he hoped he would see me around, and I told him he might if he looked hard enough. He laughed and said okay. Potential homecoming date? I called Isabelle later that night to tell her of my embarrassing lucky moment. 1/7/12 You've Got Me: a poem Not sure how not sure why Not sure when I didn't try But here I am And here you are I'm through wishing on shooting stars I've got you and you've got me In your arms is where I'm supposed to be Things have changed you know it's true You've got me and I've got you 1/8/12 "Okay, Emma. Here we go," Isabelle said as we walked into third period band Thursday. Today was the day that Isabelle gave Noah Blake my note. I wasn't so sure it was a good idea to give him any attention whatsoever, but Isabelle was quite opposed to my nonchalant feelings about him. She just didn't seem to get that he was just an annoying flirty guy that was having fun being himself. Luckily, during class Thursdays, I had my flute lessons. They generally took the whole period, which meant that Isabelle could give Noah my note without me being there to see him read it. Without warning, however, my teacher cut my lesson a full twenty minutes short this particular Thursday. I returned to the band room, my nerves going absolutely crazy. He would be able to bother me about it now, and I was not happy about that. Because the winds were working on technique that didn't involve the percussionists, it turned out to be a study hall for the percussionists that day. I was wondering if he'd read my note yet. I really wanted to know if he'd shown it to the other guys too. Isabelle sat in the back row, and lucky for me, could hear every single word uttered by the percussionists. I only guessed what could possibly be going on back there. My phone buzzed in my pocket, inaudibly. My band director, Mr. Russo, was busy talking to the confused substitute teacher across the hall. Cautiously, I opened my phone. The text message was from Isabelle. They're talking about you... it read. What are they saying? I replied. ;) Good things. Like??? Noah is replying to your note and they're helping him. Oh boy. I know. Don't worry, he'll probably give it to me to deliver at the end of the period. Want to hang out after school? Yeah, definitely. I turned to look at Isabelle and smiled. She smiled back. Just in time, I closed my phone as Mr. Russo was coming back into the room. The door opened a few minutes later. It was the guy I had embarrassed myself in front of the day before, Luke. "Can I help you?" Mr. Russo said. "Uh, hi. I'm Luke, I'm a new student here." "Oh right! You're the one that I asked your counselor to have moved up to third period. Grab your trumpet and take a seat right next to Isabelle right over in the back there. Isabelle, raise your hand please." Isabelle raised her hand. I turned around while Mr. Russo was busy with Luke and mouthed to Isabelle, that's the kid I told you about yesterday! She fake gasped and smiled. He's really cute! She mouthed back. Luke turned around and came back by Isabelle, waving at me as he passed. I smiled back. I was pretty happy that Luke was in our class. Actually, I was almost surprised at how happy I was. Maybe it was the red-hair attraction kicking in. My happy spell was interrupted by Noah Blake. He practically ruined my chances with Luke when he came over and poked me in the side while Luke and I were talking in the locker room. I squealed and glared at him angrily. "Uh, well I guess I'll see you later then, Emma," Luke said, turning and walking away. "Yeah, see you," I said. I turned back to Noah. "What the heck is wrong with you?" "Lots of things, I'm sure." He smiled smugly. "Yeah, I agree." "So I got your note." "That's unfortunate." "And I was just wondering why you didn't give me your number?" "I don't just give out my number like some people I know." "Oh, well, um, if you ever feel like it, just text me." "I will, after pigs fly and band geeks become cool." "Uh, okay. Listen, I'm sorry if I ever did anything wrong to you," he said. "Oh, um. Yeah, you didn't..." Just then, the bell rang. I was sort of taken aback by his sudden kindness. "See you later." And he was gone. Isabelle came up to me. "What the heck was that?" "I don't even know, he almost apologized I guess." "Really? Come on, you need to forgive him for whatever he did!" "I don't even really know what he did. I just sort of assumed he was a bad guy. I feel kind of bad about it." And I did. It bugged me day and night. I felt bad that I was hating Noah Blake for almost no reason at all. Sure, he had a big head and liked to embarrass me, but then again... Maybe I shouldn't have been so cold to begin with. No, no, I told myself. Be careful. He could be playing you pretty badly. I couldn't concentrate for the rest of the day. I was so confused right now. Maybe some girl time with Isabelle was really all I needed. She came over after we had both finished all our homework for the night. I was thankful to see her after being so confused over Noah and Luke all day. I still hadn't opened Noah's note. I wanted to wait for Isabelle to open it with me. "First order of business, the note," I said. "You open and read it out loud." "Why me?" "Because I might die if I do." "Okay then, I will do it for your mental safety," she laughed. "Thank you." She unfolded it. "'Emma,'" it read. "'I'm sorry if I ever did anything to make you hate me. Let's start over. I'm Noah Blake. I'm seventeen years old, and I think I might like you.'" We both gasped simultaneously. "'You don't have to respond to the previous statement, but if you ever decide to, just text me. Here's a question for you. Do you have a date to homecoming yet? From, Noah Blake.'" I wasn't sure how to respond to that, but Isabelle sure knew. "Oh. My. Gosh. This is insane! Emma! You have to play this carefully. Make sure he isn't joking around about liking you. Play some hard to get. Besides being precautionary, it's also really fun," she said, giggling. I nodded in agreement. We got out a piece of paper and my signature sparkly purple pen and began to write. 1/9/12 The following day I bumped into Luke at lunch. I wasn't at all surprised when he asked if we could sit together. "Absolutely," I said, smiling and showing him to my table. I introduced him to my friends that sat at our table. He was shy at first, but he was a hit as soon as he got more comfortable. The whole table seemed to be dying laughing after a few minutes. I was relieved. I noticed Olivia had her flirty eyes on. After lunch, I pulled her aside. "Hey, so what did you think of Luke?" I asked her, hoping to be subtle in my intentions. "He's really cute! And nice. Potential homecoming date?" I wasn't very thrilled with her response. "I was thinking the same thing..." "Oh do you like him? Sorry, I thought you and Noah had a thing..." That could be a problem. If she thought that Noah and I had something going on, then possibly Luke did too. I surely didn't want that to happen. This whole Noah deal had to stop. I had a different problem on my hands fifth period. Ryan had apparently asked some girl to homecoming a few days earlier, and it had been less than a week since he broke up with me. I hadn't heard from him in days, and of course, today he decided to talk to me. I was walking out the door when I heard him call my name. "Emma! Wait!" Oh no, I thought. My first instinct was to run the opposite direction. Somehow, my feet were glued to the ground. I felt myself turning around, almost as if it were in slow motion. I felt my lips start to form words... No! This can't be happening. "What?" My voice sounded impatient and rude. He caught up to me, and we started walking towards my class. "You don't usually walk this way," I told him, clearly hinting at the fact that he needed to get lost. "I know, but I have lunch next period so it doesn't matter." "Uh, so what do you want?" "So you know that chick in guard, Peyton?" "Yeah?" Where was he going with this? "She and I are officially dating." My mind raced for a snappy mean response but came up empty. "That's cool," I said. "Yeah, she's great. We're going on a date this Friday. I heard you and Noah Blake had something going on, so I was wondering if maybe you guys would want to double." What was wrong with this kid? "No, there's nothing going on with me and Noah Blake! What is wrong with you people?" "Oh, sorry. I thought there was. Well anyway, Peyton..." I tuned him out until we finally reached the girls bathroom by my classroom. I said I had to go and hurried into the bathroom. I was feeling sick. Ryan had just been talking to me so he could rub it in my face that he had a girlfriend while I was still single. While I was trying not to puke in one of the stalls, I heard the second bell ring. I didn't care at this point. I walked into my history class five minutes late and asked my teacher if I could go to the nurse. She said absolutely and wrote me a pass. The nurse was understanding and let me sleep for the period before returning to my next class. I felt absolutely terrible. She noticed I had tears staining my cheeks and asked if I needed to go see my counselor. I told her no, I was fine. I cleaned up and headed back to class. I ran into Luke for a second time on my way. He noticed that my eyes were a little red and asked if there was anything wrong. I told him I was just tired, but he didn't believe me. He gave me his number so I could text him after school, maybe go get some ice cream later. I thanked him and walked into my math class. The rest of the day was a blur. Ryan had really messed up my day. All I could think about was how he and Peyton would do all the same stuff I did with him. He'd get her the same stupid stuffed animals for Valentine's Day, say the same stupid romantic words while kissing her, and probably go to the same stupid places. I didn't really want to think about it, but these things continued to come to my mind all day. I even forgot to text Luke later because of it. Isabelle texted me around dinner time, telling me that she'd heard rumors of different people wanting to ask her to homecoming. She'd even heard rumors that Noah Blake was thinking about it, but I refused to believe it. He probably would ask ten other girls first. I knew his type. Only infatuated by the fact that I was a single girl who couldn't care less about him. He had no real interest in me. I tried my best to forget about him. I went on Facebook for a while. Luke was on, and he messaged me. Hey, why didn't you text me yet? he said. Sorry! I forgot! Here's my number. Text me. I said, typing my number into the message. I got a text from him only seconds later. He didn't text like a guy at all. He responded with full paragraphs and interesting stories about where he lived before he moved. I fell asleep texting him at ten thirty. 1/10/12 1/10/12 An Ode to Finals Week: a poem Being a teenager isn't so easy Yes I know I sound cliche and cheesy But hey, it's the truth hormones and all Five hours of homework how I dread fall There's so much to do and not enough time I'm so tired that I'm oblivious and hey, this poem rhymes Pressure to pass and far too much work College comes soon I think I might burst Pimples to pop and fun to have If I weren't so tired this wouldn't be such a drag So here's to the teens every last one Because being a teenager sure isn't fun 1/11/12 I woke to the sound of my phone buzzing. It was ten thirty on Saturday morning. Thank goodness for weekends. It felt so good to sleep in. A text had just arrived from Luke. Hey, did you fall asleep on me last night? haha. Yeah sorry I was tired. I responded. I had a really weird dream the night before. That tended to happen a lot with me. I had a dream that Luke and Noah both liked me. That was great and everything, and if that happened in real life, I definitely wouldn't have complained. The problem in my dream was that I didn't know which one of them to pick. I had the hardest time choosing between Noah and Luke. I woke up when Luke texted me, right when I was about to kiss Noah. I was definitely confused. In real life, I think I would have picked Luke. He was adorable, and his personality was more appealing than Noah's. In my dream, however, I had picked Noah. I just couldn't figure this out in my head. I decided I would just get up. No point in going back to sleep now. I had better things to do than lie in bed and confuse myself more. Isabelle, Olivia, and I were going to the mall today to celebrate surviving our first week of our sophomore year. Isabelle had gotten her license a few weeks previous. She was really only allowed to drive one person besides family, but she decided it would be okay for Olivia to come too. She was going to pick us up at twelve. I had an hour and a half to get ready. I went into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. Maybe I was wrong about Noah. Maybe he didn't like me. It was hard to believe that any guy could like a girl like me. Pale-skinned, freckles, green eyes, pin-straight red hair... It just wasn't all that appealing. I didn't understand. I had plain features. My eyes were most definitely my best feature, but nothing to rave about. I wondered if I would be asked to homecoming. I wanted to know. I felt like I needed to know. Actually, Isabelle and Olivia were planning on going with our group of girl friends if none of us got asked. I decided that I could do that if I didn't get any other offers. The shower felt especially good that morning, and it gave me more of a chance to think. I realized that I hadn't texted Luke back again. He was so extremely good looking, I couldn't believe he had initiated the conversations we'd had. Those bright blue eyes were so welcoming. I loved how we both had red hair. He had these dimples when he smiled...and I barely even knew him. I'd noticed all this just from the few times I'd seen him. I got out of the shower and was forced to look at my face again in the mirror. I put on my cutest outfit, and even had time to straighten my hair. I was touching up my make-up when I got a call from Isabelle. "Hey Em, how you doing?" "Just getting ready to go, why?" "Well, see here's the thing. Olivia and I forgot to mention that a few guys agreed to meet us at the mall, is that okay with you?" "Uh, yeah sure, I guess so." Uh-oh. Well, at least I looked half-way decent. I sprayed my perfume and looked in the mirror one last time. I smiled at myself, slightly pleased with what I saw. I grabbed my purse and waited by the door for Isabelle to come pick me up. 1/12/12 I got into her car, excited to be with my friends. We turned the radio up and sang along to our favorite Taylor Swift songs about guys who don't deserve us. It was great. There's nothing better than laughing with two of your best girlfriends. They were the only ones who really knew who I was. I wasn't reserved or holding back. I was just me. When we reached the mall, the guys Isabelle had talked about were waiting by the entrance for us. There were three of them. One had dark, almost black, brown hair and blue eyes, his name was Dylan. He came right up to me and introduced himself. I didn't know him, but apparently Olivia and Isabelle did. They said he went to church with them. His friends, Jake and Miles, also knew Olivia and Isabelle from church. I had never met any of them, and I was a little bit nervous. I was having a hard time getting used to our new friends when I saw Noah at the Starbucks across the way. He waved, motioning for me to come over to him. I waved back. Anything familiar at that point was welcoming. I told Olivia and Isabelle that I would catch up with them later and headed over to see Noah. "Hey! What are you doing here?" he asked. "Just hanging out with Isabelle and Olivia and a few of their friends." "Yeah, I've never seen those guys before. Where they from?" "Me either, they're from some private school. So what are you doing here?" "Just was in the area and I wanted some Starbucks so I came in the mall." We just kept on talking and talking. I didn't really know why it seemed to work so well. It was like I'd known him for years. Naturally, he flirted. I even caught myself flirting back a little bit, despite my efforts not to. What was happening to me? I spent the rest of the day with Noah. I told Isabelle and Olivia that he could drive me home, and we even got something for dinner. I didn't let him pay, of course. I didn't want him to think we were on a date. I guess I could handle being friends with Noah Blake. He drove me home, and he asked me if we could do it again sometime. "Maybe. Thanks for the ride home, see you tomorrow, Noah." I couldn't help but smile as I walked up to the door. My mom was in the living room when I got home. I was bombarded with questions before I could even take of my shoes. "Where were you? Who was that guy? Why was he driving you home?" She was not happy. "I told you I was going to the mall with Isabelle and Olivia. They met some guys that they knew from church there and I was feeling uncomfortable so I saw my friend Noah and hung out with him instead. He drove me home because they had to leave." "Don't you ever do that again, you understand? You are not allowed in a car with a boy." "Oh come on, Mom. It's not like-" "No, I don't want to hear it. End of discussion." I had random arguments with my mom in the past, but recently things had gotten a little tighter between us. Maybe it was because I was getting older. I didn't understand why she didn't trust me anymore. It was like after I broke up with Ryan she thought I would go wild or something. That hadn't happened yet, and I didn't really plan on it happening anytime soon. Sunday came quicker than I would have liked. I got up on Sunday's at eight thirty to go to church. It was fun because I went to a small group Sunday mornings with a bunch of really cool kids from a few towns over. They were almost all marching band kids. We understood each other really well. Today we did an ice breaker before we jumped back into our study of Luke. It was kind of an awkward ice breaker, but it was fun. You had somebody in the middle with a blind fold on and a pillow in hand. Everyone else was in a circle. The person in the middle had to sit on somebody with the pillow and the person sat upon had to make an animal noise. The sitter had to try and guess who it was. If he or she got it in three tries, the person sat upon was in the middle. It was really funny when a big giant guy accidentally sat on the tiniest girl in the room, crushing her so all she could do was gasp for breath. I got sat on by at least three guys. None of them could ever guess that it was me. I was glad, because I didn't want to be the sitter. Sunday afternoons were usually spent doing homework. Things were usually pretty chaotic at home with my little brothers running around, so I sometimes biked to the library. It was a great day for biking. I enjoyed myself explicitly just riding along the prairie path. I was enjoying myself so much that I didn't see the bench that had magically appeared in front of me. I ran into it and flipped right over the handle bars into a startled guy's lap. He gasped in pain. I was embarrassed enough until I looked up to see that it was Noah Blake. "Oh my gosh I'm so sorry!" "It's-it's...owwww... it's alright Emma." "Um, thanks for breaking my fall." "No, ow, problem." After he recovered, he invited me to sit with him for a bit. I agreed and took a seat next to him, embarrassed when I realized that I was still on his lap. "So, what brings you here?" "Oh, I was on my way to the library to do some homework. How about you?" "Sometimes I come out here to do my writing. I write short stories and poems." "Oh really? I didn't know that. What are you writing about now?" "Nothing, nothing at all." "Can I read-" "No, no you can't! Sorry. It's for my eyes only." "Um, okay then." "So, I was just wondering if you still hate me." "Hate you? I never hated you exactly, you just got on my nerves...all the time." "Ah, I see. So since you don't hate me, would you want to go to a movie soon?" I immediately started to close up. "Uh, sorry, I got to go do my homework, see you later." And with that, I was off on my bike again. What I didn't realize was that I had forgotten my helmet on the bench with Noah. |