Chapters 3 & 4 of Beauty From Ashes

                                                                                      3. 

             



              2 Peter 3:16; There are some things in them (scriptures) that are hard to understand, which the  ignorant and unstable twist to their own destruction.

              Leland awoke to the five o’clock news. Hearing the phrase “Murder in the park,” brought him fully awake. Pictures of police and state troopers flashed on the screen of his old 20 inch RCA television. Leaning forward in his recliner, he watched with rapt attention.  His heart took off on a wild, unhinged dance.

              A pretty, young, blonde female reporter was talking to her network.

            “Yes Phil, I am confirming the murder of a young, unidentified woman in the Riley Park, in the small town of Mystic Valley Maine.  She was found by a female jogger, early this morning around eight o’clock.  State police have been on the scene all day combing the area and neighborhood for clues.  The Crime Investigation Division (CID) from Mystic Valley was seen here first thing this morning ……”

              As the pictures of the CID team flashed on the screen, Leland saw a woman from his church with a badge getting into her black Land Rover.  Why didn’t I know that she worked for the police?  He thought.  My wife told me she was a nurse.  Feeling confused and anxious, Leland began to pace.

          He walked to the t.v. and began flipping channels to try and get another look at her. Fox News was reporting the murder and he spied the woman on the corner of the screen.  She was a tall, thin woman who his wife said looked younger than her years.  She had shoulder length dark brown hair that was in a pony tail.  She was holding a suitcase of some kind and talking to a state police officer.  I think my wife said her name was Tayler…or something like that, he thought. 

          Absent mindedly he placed his right hand on his heart to try and calm the pain that was beginning to spread there. His neck and arms began to ache as bile burned its way up into his throat.  Barely making it to the toilet, he bent over and heaved the contents in his stomach.  His mind was racing, and he no longer felt so at peace with what he had done.

      As he paced around his small living room, the demons lumbered around him laughing in high pitched squeals, unheard by the human ear.  Each demon was taking their turn of whispering into his ears. “Murderer…Avenger…Butcher…God’s right hand man.”  He had been their puppet for evil and they were enjoying every minute of it.  He hadn’t started out as theirs but he caved in quickly once they got a foot hold of anger in his heart.                                                                              

          Grabbing his Bible off the shelf he quickly rifled through the thin, worn pages until he found the scriptures he was looking for.  He read them aloud, over and over, until he felt a calm settle in his bones. 

          Proverbs 24:11-12; Rescue those who are being taken away to death; hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter.

          Exodus 23:7; keep far from a false charge, and do not kill the innocent and the righteous, for I will not acquit the wicked.

          Exodus 20:13; Thou shalt not murder. 

          Pacing frantically around the living room in a circular pattern, Leland read the scriptures aloud.  The demons were now screaming for a different reason.  They were screaming from pain.  Every word of God struck them like a heavy punch to the gut and ripped pain through their head like a bolt of lightning.  They left him alone for a while.  Even though he was using the word of God to justify evil, the word of God could not be overtaken by evil.  He continued to read the passages that made him feel justified in his hatred. 

          Corinthians 3:16-17; Do you not know you are Gods and that the Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys the temple, God will destroy him.  For God’s temple is holy, and you are that temple.

          Proverbs 6: 16-17; There are six things the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him; haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood.

          Whenever he read these scriptures, Leland was sure that God’s grace was sufficient for him.  He had been fighting for the rights of the unborn child for years.  His wife Martha had wanted a child desperately but she never conceived.  They tried to erase the pain by being involved in protecting the rights of the unborn. 

          It started out as a worthy cause for Christ but the anger in his heart overtook the voice of God and started a life of its own. A life filled with hate, lies and now death.  Lately he had started to try to convince the young girls at the abortion clinic to change their mind, by giving them pamphlets and reciting scripture to them on their way into the abortion clinic, but they still were not listening. 

        He knew as he read these scriptures that God felt it was okay to take Kendra’s life today.  He continued to read his Bible and talk to his dead wife. 

        “Marty, I had to kill her.  She wouldn’t listen to me about God’s love and his hate of abortion.  She laughed at me and told me to get lost.  I pray that you understand I had to do it.  She wasn’t sorry for what she was going to do.”

      The two large, jet black demons focused on another being in the room. In the corner of the living room stood Leland’s guardian angel, being tormented by the demons that invaded the home where angels once stayed. His role was limited now and his only job was to be ready if, and when, repentance from Leland came.  His mighty sword was in the holder hanging from his waist, and his shield lay on the floor.  He was standing proud but powerless. He watched his charge fall deeper into darkness by twisting the great words of the living God. Oh how God’s heart must be breaking over the fall of this man, thought the guardian.





        Yahweh again stood in the portal of heaven with Michael and watched as one of His children sank deeper and deeper into the hands of the devil. 

        “He isn’t seeing anything clearly…He didn’t have the eyes to see or the heart to feel the struggle that was going on in Kendra’s heart.  She ran to me…and I accepted her…” Yahweh said.           

        “And he is the puppet of evil.” Michael said in response.







                                                                           

                                                                             



                                                                                    4.



                              Psalm 91:11; He shall give His angels charge over thee to keep thee in all thy ways.





            After logging the evidence with the Maine State Crime Lab, Tanner drove down the street to the police station.  State Trooper and CID 11 vehicles filled the parking lot that lately was half empty due to budget cuts.   

          “Let the fun begin,” she said to herself as she parked her Rover.

            Readying her things to get out, Tanner felt a sudden desire to pray. By the quickening of her heart she knew it was urgent. Over this last year she had learned to recognize when God was trying to get her attention by the quickening of her heart and the urge to pray. Turning off the engine, she sat with her eyes closed and waited for an impression to come to her.

            What is it that you are trying to tell me Lord? Is it this case or is my family in need of some prayer cover? 

            The impression lessened and passed after a few minutes so she shook it off as her own jitters about the murdered young woman.  She grabbed her purse and climbed out of the Rover.  Walking and texting, she sent a quick message to her husband.  Love you babe…busy day and no time to talk right now…call ya later.

        Ceasor, and the two new guardians that Michael had sent him, walked behind her into the building.  The guardians noted the smell that mimicked rotting meat as they rounded the building.  Evil was here.    Each of them instinctively reached to check for their sword as their eyes canvassed their surroundings.  Ceasor moved ahead of Tanner and let the other two fall behind. 

            Walking through the station Tanner felt the change in electricity.  Officers were milling around their desks conversing with each other about evidence and theories. Mystic Valley Maine has not had a murder, unrelated to obvious domestic violence, in ten years.  The town’s census last year was forty- eight hundred men, women and children. The police department holds six full time positions, one chief, three officers and two detectives.  The Crime Scene Division is one of two in the state of Maine.  Mystic Valley’s division holds six full time positions, the other CSI division is in Portland Maine, has thirty two full time positions.  ******* (more about the town, and its economy…landscape and history…where to put it)

              A quick jingle from her blackberry indicated a message.  Fishing her phone out of her bag, Tanner read her husband’s message. Heard about the murder…be careful…love you. Flipping the light on in her small cubicle she sat down in her black leather chair and smiled.  “Thank you Jesus for the man you gave to me,” she softly said. 

            Waiting for her computer to boot up, Tanner sat back and let her mind wander…she could still smell the odor of death that clung in her nostrils.  She smiled as she recalled the moment her husband realized that particles of death really cling to the nasal passages.

            “That is seriously disgusting Tanner…why do you tell me these things?” he had said.

              Bon Jovi‘s voice filled the cubicle.  “It’s Tanner,”  she answered while she looked around her space.

              Her cubicle was neat and tidy, a fact that drove the other division members crazy.  She took pride in her space and found it impossible to work with it cluttered. Her cubicle had three, six foot walls in a u shape that was located in the back of the room.  Her desk faced the opening of the cubicle so she could see when someone came toward her.  She did not like to have her back to the opened door way, it  made her feel vulnerable and unsafe. 

          “We found evidence that will tickle your fancy,” John excitedly yelled into the phone.       

          “What is it?” she asked, as she leaned back in her chair and absentmindedly started to bite the fingernails on her left hand.

            “Steve found a bullet casing in the grass, bordering the dirt opening of the clearing, and Tim found some kind of information pamphlet on saving unborn babies that was in the lower third of the grid.”

            “Could be related with the scriptures that were pinned to her,” she replied, in a statement to herself more than to John.

            “Doug also found a safety pin that looked like the ones holding the notes to our victim.”

            “Where was the safety pin?” she asked.

            “On the ground a few inches away from the pamphlet.”

            “Odd that those items were just in the grass…maybe the killer dropped them on purpose? Or maybe they aren’t related to the murder at all,” She said with a new sense of urgency that matched the rate of her nail biting.

            “Tim did the cast of the shoe prints you marked. He is bringing those to the crime lab for analysis as we speak. That’s about it. I’m headed over to the crime lab now as well, so I’ll see you in a while,” John said as he hung up without waiting for a reply.

            Tanner touched off her cell phone and sat staring at the photo of her family.  Her husband and their dog Rocket sat together in a canoe, fishing, at Lake Moxie. Taking a deep breath to calm her racing heart she prayed. 

            Lord, this case is going to be about abortion in some way, isn’t it? You wanted me to pray earlier in the Rover to prepare me for this.  I don’t want to have to do this, Father.  Did this young woman have an abortion and get killed because of it?  Why does this make me feel so vulnerable all over again, Lord?

        Two medium sized, brown demons lurked around Tanner’s cubicle feeding her memories of the past sin that plagued her.  Gangrenous odor trailed them as they laughed and howled with pleasure as her face twisted with sadness. Allowed to linger for just a moment before Ceasor stepped forward, they fell into each other in a hasty retreat.

        An image of the Jefferson abortion clinic came rushing to Tanner as she prayed.  She asked for forgiveness and wiped the tears that had so quickly made trails down her face. 

        Ceasar prayed for her as he stood guard. He knew her heart was aching as she thought about where life had once taken her and how this case would bring her back there.    He leaned in close to her and whispered the scripture that God gave to him for her, “In the fear of the Lord is strong confidence and his children shall have a place of refuge.”                                                                            

            Opening her eyes and standing as she wiped the tears, the scripture, Proverbs 14:26, floated through her mind: In the fear of the Lord is strong confidence and his children shall have a place of refuge.

            Funny, she thought, I haven’t thought of that scripture in years.

          “Yes Lord, I want to believe it,” she said out loud as she packed up her reports in order to go out and grab some lunch before going to the conference room.

            Anyone looking at Tanner would see a self assured woman.  No one knew that she had a secret that made her feel shameful and insecure.  She had prayed for forgiveness many years ago and continued to pray about it almost daily.  She knew in her mind that God forgave her, but her heart would not let the knowledge in; a fact that grieved God.

            The clock in Tanner’s Rover read 3:55 p.m. She drove to Al’s Pizza to grab a veggie Italian, with no oil and extra tomatoes; her usual.  As she waited for her sandwich, Tanner text messaged her husband, Jack, a quick note so she would not interrupt his meeting. 

            I’ll be late tonight, I’m sorry.

            A reply came back. Why, hot date?

            She answered, Clever ... murder… call u in a bit. 

            He answered her. The news is all over town...love u... see u when I see u. 

            Walking to the Rover with her sandwich, she lifted her face to the warm sun and let the sensation sooth her tired mind. The beginning signs of a major headache were forming over her left eye.  She prayed, “Lord, take away this pain so I can focus, In Jesus name.”

            Back in her vehicle, with her Italian sandwich sitting in the passenger seat next to Ceasor, Tanner whipped through the McDonald’s drive through to get a medium diet coke; her favorite addiction.  Taking a long drink through the straw she let the cold, burning sensation sooth her dry mouth. 

            “Thank you Jesus for diet coke,” she said as she pulled the Rover out onto the main street and headed back to the division for the beginning of a long night.

            As she drove, she thought about how blessed she was.  She was married to her high school sweet heart for the last twenty five years.  She was deeply and passionately in love with him.  Jack was kind, funny, and a wonderful provider.  He loved her with a passionate love that she adored.  He made her feel safe, beautiful and loved.  He made her laugh with his constant whit. Sure, the fought at times, but those times were few and far between.

            Their home was a haven, one that they both enjoyed spending time in.  She gave a brief moment’s thought to the nagging pain of guilt over her abortion many years ago, the reason she was sure caused her inability to be blessed with children.  Her best girl friend told her that was a lie from the pit of hell.  She hoped that was true. 

              Sadness over being unable to bear children plagued her, even though she felt a peace that God knew what he was doing.  Tanner poured love into her husband and their pets… and she was a “fairy god mother” to all their friend’s children which helped some.