Freedom From Hell

When I was in college I knew what it was like to be a Christian and I might have been saved then. But if I was I was a lukewarm Christian. I was reluctant to give up my freedom, this was the first time I was away from home. And I was raised in a God-Fearing Catholic Home. With things I had been taught in the Catholic Church and in Catholic School I was very sure I was bound for Hell. I was rebellious and had a did not care attitude. I think I acquired that attitude because of my experience in Catholic School. Being the smallest one in class I was picked on and beat up on an almost daily basis. I was told I would never amount to anything. I did not do well in School I barely passed by the skin of my teeth. My brother and sisters (5 brothers and 4 sisters) kept telling my parents to get me out of that school and put me in public school. They didn't want to put me in the public school because they heard of drugs in the high school. Then they found that the Catholic High Schools also had drugs. So I started Public School in ninth grade. And everything got better. As I was growing up I had no friends, just a couple people who used me. In high school things got a lot better. I felt like I belonged. I made friends, my grades were a lot better, I joined the track team ran the mile and two mile and ran cross country. Things were so much better. However, I carried a grudge against God because of my experience in the Catholic Church. And when I was sixteen, I stopped believing in God.

Even though High School was a lot better than the Catholic School I attended, this my junior year was the hardest for me. My high school had so many students in it, that the school had a split session. The freshmen and sophomores started school in the later morning, the juniors and seniors came in earlier. I would have to wake up at 5:30 in the morning, catch the bus at 6:30. School started at 7:00. I was done at 11:30. However, after school I went to BOCES for three hours. I was thinking about going to college to take Nursing courses. So at BOCES I was taking Nurse's Aide. Then at 4:00 I was back at school for track practice. I would be back home at 7:30 that night. When I think about it that was a tough schedule. Because of my experiences I had with the Catholic School, I stopped believing in God. It is kind of funny because I didn't believe in God but I believed that I was going to Hell for not believing in God. Kind of Contradicting myself here.

I was in my second semester in College. My first semester I went to a local college. I was still think about taking Nursing and I was taking Biological Technology there. However, this was a very hard major and Science is not my strongest point. I ended up transferring to another college for my second semester. I decided to take General Studies until I knew what I wanted to do with my education. At that point I decided that Nursing wasn't my field. I think it was God's plan for me to go to that college. (Actually I know it was God's plan.) A couple of weeks after I started going there, I met Ray. He basically approached me and started talking about Jesus. He told me how Jesus had died on the cross for my sins. He told me that I would go to heaven if I believed that he is the Son of God, that he died for my sins and if I took Jesus as my personal savior. At that moment I started believing again. Ray and I must have talked for a couple of hours. I asked questions and he answered them honestly. The main reason I accepted what Ray told me was because he didn't approach me preaching fire and brimstone. He approached me in a kind, gentle and humble manner. I went to several on Campus Bible studies. And was involved in Campus Crusade For Christ when I finished up my last two years at my last college.