life isnt fair

For a moment, it seemed, I was part of something beautiful; something that seemed flawless. For a split second, it seemed like not only would I have a happy ending, but also a happy middle, which is something people often overlook while searching for something that will give them a fulfilling conclusion to their life. But, you see, while lost in the colors of his eyes and the way his skin next to mine sparked madness that I'd never felt before, I myself overlooked one small detail: the things that seem the most flawless often speak the deepest secrets. He was searching for something that no one will ever be able to give him. For a love that had long ago ended in tragedy. One day, perhaps, he will realize that a love like that only comes once in a lifetime; he will never find i(her)t again. When he realizes this, he will have a girl by his side because he.hates being alone. When he learns that if he's going to ever love again, he must first let his first love go, the girl that he lowers his standards for will not understand that she is and always will be second in his heart. She will be luckier than she knows to have him to hold every night, and she won't realize the entire situation.
I truly hope that one day, he will.realize that I knew this the whole time. I always knew I could never have him, as as much as he tried to fool himself and me. I hope he can think fondly of me. And know that I loved him and always understood. I hope he remembers the smell of the leaves the Autumn I called him mine, just as I will always remember the way the sun hit his face and the sheets of his bed. I'll never forget the way he whispered that he loved me, and that I believed him, because at that moment, I think he meant it. I'll never regret the days we spent together.