I Guess That's Just California...

    Oh Cali girl, you truly are a mess. Once again she shows up disheveled on my doorstep, clad in far too much makeup and not nearly enough clothing.
    Oh Cali girl, I really do wish you’d take better care of yourself. Selfishly I will always leave my home open to you, my door unlocked even in a neighborhood like this, I will enable you to live this way.
    Yet again selfishly, I cherish the time you spend here; whether it be taking you in because you have nowhere to go or holding your hair back at three in the morning after you’ve spent a long night out with your ‘friends’ whom, bless your soul, you swear are good people.
    You do have a wild streak Cali girl; a daring, partying side I wouldn’t have expected to be masked behind such a sweet and cheery face. I guess that’s just the California in you, the California written all over that accent of yours. Although, come to think of it, you do have to be a little out there to pack up and leave your country in the first place, let alone when you’re only barely fluent in the language of your destination. You’ve got guts Cali girl, I give you that.
    Quite honestly you’ve got a good head on your shoulders too. Your  heart just overrides it. Your heart is a reckless free-spirit with no regard for the one it belongs to. You care too much Cali girl, you trust too easy, you let them take advantage of you.
    But that brought you to me. They use you for all you’re worth and then cast you aside. Don’t worry Cali girl, I’ll keep you here, away from them. They don’t deserve you.
    Which brings us to now; me sitting on the edge of my bed, next to you. So many times have I seen this before. What brings us together tonight, I’m not sure. Clearly you couldn’t, or at least didn’t want to, talk about it. That’s fine by me.
    I may have let you in immediately but I don’t expect you to do the same. What compelled me to even do so I really don’t know. You showed up a stranger, really you’re still a stranger, outside of this ratty old apartment building with nothing. You had with you absolutely nothing.
    You told me that day that you came here to sing. I remember making you sing for me, it was beautiful. When I joined in you said the same to me. Something changed in me that day. Something good.
    You came to sing. Why then, are you here passed out next to me? I’m sorry for disturbing you while you sleep but I can’t stand to look at the makeup, that which you don’t need in the first place, smudged all over your face, mascara streaking down your cheeks. I’m not going to lie, part of me really would like you to wake up. To see me. To realize that I’m the one who will truly care for you.
    I’d rather allow you to rest though. I’m content to just be with you.
    That’s not entirely true though.
    Content perhaps, but not satisfied. As the thought crosses my mind I can’t help but find myself lightly tracing the contours of your hand with my own. Just once I’m tempted to stay here beside you so that when you wake up  you see me with you as opposed to my usual station, the couch. I know I’ll never find the courage to face you after such a thing so I guess I just need to keep that bit of information to myself.
    Oh Cali girl, you really do need someone, if not me at least someone, to look out for you. You hold your head up high but you’re really just a damsel looking for a way out.

Let me be your way out.