Treehouse of Horror 2009.

Welcome dear reader, to a bunch of Simpson's Halloween stories written together as a trilogy in 2009. Read on for some of the weirdest Simpson's fan fiction you have ever read, will ever read or ever have read. FOREVER.

Disclaimer: The Simpson's belong to Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation. This fan fiction is intended as a non profit parody only, no conscious attempt to defame, pass off or claim ownership has been made within this text. All characters within are purely fictional and in no way intended to resemble persons living or dead. No offence is intended to any reader, if offence is caused anyway please feel free to stop reading at any time instead of reading the entire thing then complaining anyway.

Part 1.

A picture of Marge and Lisa.

The scene opens on the Simpson's living room, Homer is watching the news while drinking a can of beer.

"And so with Springfield's Isotopes making the play-offs, this time without any allegations of doping, it's sure to be a great night for sports fans all over town." Kent Brokman said on the TV.

"Mmm local sports team. I gotta get to Moe's." Homer said then took another sip of beer. He got up and was about to leave when Marge entered the room barring the way to the hallway.

"Oh hi honey, I was just going out to Moe's to watch the big game." Homer said.

"Please Homer, don't go out to that sleazy bar, I wanted to do something together as a couple." Marge replied. Homer laughed.

"Marge, there'll be time for that later." Homer responded.

"Yeah right and I wasn't talking about that." Marge replied.

"D'oh!" Homer said.

"I was talking about you posing for me so we could be in a painting together." Marge continued. Homer looked upset.

"But Marge, a local sports team is in a play-off, it's a chance for a guy like me to go to a bar, drink far too much and bond with a bunch of guys I hardly know. Do you want to take that away from me?" Homer said.

"But Homer, there are people here who know and love you, couldn't you stay here and bond with them?" Marge replied. Homer sighed.

"You just don't understand sport and getting drunk watching sport do you Marge? Now let me go, at this rate I'll miss happy hour." Homer said then he barged forward and Marge let him go.

"Fine go to your stupid bar but don't be out too late, I'd say don't come home drunk but then I'd just be wasting my breath." Marge said as he left. Homer put on his coat and headed for the door.

"Goodbye, love you." Homer said, Marge just made her frustrated noise.

The scene switched to the kitchen as Marge came in and sat at the table looking discouraged and irritated. Lisa came into the room and immediately noticed her mothers demeanour.

"Mom, what's wrong, are you mad because dad's gone out drinking again?" Lisa asked. Marge sighed.

"Sort of, I wanted to do something together as a couple, a painting of us together. But of course your father is more interested in achieving advanced stages of mental incompetence by drinking lots and lots of duff beer." Marge replied, Lisa sat down next to Marge at the table.

"Well how about you paint the picture anyway and I'll be in it with you." Lisa suggested.

"That's nice honey, but I don't know, I really wanted it to be Homer and myself." Marge said.

"Mom, just because dad isn't interested doesn't mean you should be discouraged, your art is good, lets do this thing anyway." Lisa said, Marge thought about it for a second.

"You know what, you're right, if Homer would rather get drunk watching baseball then let him. We'll create something special and lasting instead of just a bad hangover. Just let me get my art supplies." Marge replied.

The scene now changed to a few minutes later with Lisa helping Marge to set up her easel, canvas, paints and brushes in the front room.

"Okay, since we're both going to be in this painting and I'm the one painting it then we'll have to use a photograph as a reference." Marge said when everything was ready. Marge picked up a camera which she mounted on a tripod then set it to take a picture automatically with a timer, both Marge and Lisa stood in front of it and smiled then it took the picture which it spat out. Marge takes it and begins her painting while Lisa observes from the couch.

The scene changed again and "Several hours later" appears on screen, Marge had now finished the painting which was her and Lisa in the pose and clothes from the photograph but instead of the background being their house it was an old Edwardian style house. It looked like something from Sherlock Holmes or the “19th century house” reality TV show that the family was once in. Marge stepped back to get a better look at her painting.

"There, done and done." Marge said. Lisa who was looking a bit bored by this stage got up to look at the painting.

"Wow mom, it's great, you really captured our likeness from the photo and I love the anachronism of the background." Lisa said, Marge smiled.

"Why thank you Lisa." Marge said then looked at her watch.

"Oooh, look at the time, let me just put this over here to dry and then it's off to bed." Marge said, she put the painting in front of the fireplace then lead Lisa upstairs to go to bed.

The scene then changed and the words "A couple of hours later" appeared on screen. There was a fumbling noise followed by muffled swearing as Homer tried to open the front door which he then shut and locked behind him. He then walked forward, stopped, belched and noticed Marge's painting by the moonlight that was still coming in through the front window. Homer drunkenly walked towards it, stopped once then squinted at it until he got a bit closer so he could make out the detail.

"Oh, she did do a painting after all, aww Lisa's in it too, no sign of the boy." Homer said then he looked at the painting for a moment before his lip started to quiver then he cried.

"Oh Marge, you're so beautiful and talented why did I decide to go get drunk at a bar instead of spending time with you? I'm such a jerk, I don't deserve you." Homer then turned away to leave but turned back.

"I wish you could both stay thin, young and beautiful no matter what, perfect just like you are now." Homer said then he walked over to the couch and sat down looking sullen. Suddenly there was a bolt of lightning out of nowhere. Homer was momentarily shocked then he just shook his head and headed up the stairs to bed.

The next day at breakfast Homer and Bart noticed that Marge and Lisa seemed strangely hungry, both of them were eating a lot more than usual. Neither Bart or Homer said anything about it especially since they were no strangers to overeating themselves. That afternoon after school when they were both watching the Krusty the clown show Bart noticed that Lisa was eating sweets between meals which was unusual for her.

"Hey, Lisa you might wanna lay off the sweets a little, take it from me they'll make you fat." Bart said concerned. Lisa was shocked and irritated by Bart's remark.

"Bart, how dare you of all people lecture me about my dietary choices, you're the one who had to go to fat camp to loose weight after the school installed those vending machines remember?" Lisa replied then she then poked Bart in his belly to emphasise the point.

"Besides you're not exactly a model of healthy eating yourself even now." Lisa continued, Bart shrugged.

"Huh, I'm comfortable with the way I am and I was just trying to help. Jeeze." Bart replied. Lisa sighed.

"Bart, telling girls they are fat, will get fat, should eat less is tactless, deeply sexist and dangerous! Do you have any idea how many lives anorexia claims each year?" Lisa asked, Bart folded his arms.

"Okay, okay I get your point. Now lets just watch the show." Bart replied.

Later at dinner Homer noticed how much Marge was eating.

"Wow Marge, you're sure packing it away, do you think you might be pregnant again?" Homer asked, Marge blushed a deep red and everyone else at the table including Maggie dropped their spoons/forks. Homer realised that he'd made a blunder.

"Well what I meant to say was, honey, that.." Homer began.

"Homer, I know you think I just sit around and read magazines all day but cleaning this place, including all the mess you make, looking after three kids, doing the laundry and doing the shopping is a full time job. Of course I'm hungry, I never stop, I'm probably working more hours than you do." Marge interrupted, Homer was about to disagree with Marge when he noticed Lisa and Bart across the table making gestures for "NO!" and "Don't do it!" he tried to think of something else to say then Maggie flicked a pea at him making him go "D'oh!" then everyone laughed including Homer who thought, phew, narrow escape. Thanks Maggie.

This trend continued for several weeks. There was a montage of Marge and Lisa overeating while the rest of the family couldn't believe it and wondered why they never gained a pound. Soon their eating habits had changed so much that they ate far more than Bart or even Homer and after a month Homer started to suspect something was seriously wrong.

Homer was lying in his hammock in the back yard wondering why his wife and eldest daughter never gained any weight despite their tremendous apatites. Suddenly Homer remembered about the painting, the wish he made and the lightning. He got up from the hammock in shock.

"Uh oh." Homer said then he went into the house, upstairs then into the master bedroom. He opened the wardrobe then a box inside it which contained the painting Marge did of herself and Lisa. Immediately Homer noticed that Marge and Lisa in the picture had put on a large amount of weight. Both of them had wider waists, fattened arms, as well as fatter legs, wider hips and bigger butts. Marge's breasts were much bigger while Lisa's chest was puffy, even their faces looked fatter with extra chins and chubby cheeks. They were otherwise unchanged just like when Marge painted it only subject to considerable weight gain. Homer wasn't sure how much they weighed in the picture but he figured Marge would be heavier than him and Lisa would certainly be the biggest girl in school no doubt about that. Homer sat in silence for a while considering what he'd seen.

"Well I guess that explains why they never gain weight. Now I'll just put this back and surely nothing bad will happen." Homer said to himself then he put the painting away in the box and closed the wardrobe before he walked away with his hands in his pockets casually whistling the Simpson's theme tune.

That night when Homer and Marge went to bed Marge fell asleep quickly but Homer found that he was unable to sleep, then after some time he started to hear a voice.

"Why didn't you tell them? You must tell them the truth!" the mysterious voice asked Homer over and over again. Homer got hardly any sleep and this went on for several days until Homer was half crazy from sleep deprivation. He heard the voice again and decided to do something about it. Homer got up then walked to the wardrobe, he took out the painting of Marge and Lisa. He immediately noticed that they've gotten even fatter than they were before now being well and truly obese by any standards. Homer heard the voice again

"Oh I'll show them! I'll shown them all! Ahahahaha!" Homer said then he went downstairs and started a fire in the fireplace which he then placed the painting in and waited. As soon as the fire got going it took hold of the painting which was soon on fire. At this point the rest of the family came in and saw Homer staring into the fire at the painting. Marge noticed the painting was the one that she painted recently of herself and Lisa.

"Oh no! My artwork!" Marge said. Lisa noticed the detail in the painting.

"I've got a bad feeling about this." Lisa said then the fire consumed the painting.

"Ha! Take that curse!" Homer said triumphantly but then Marge and Lisa begins to feel strange.

"I don't think you should have done that Homer." Marge said.

"Arrgg! I'm getting fatter! It must be the curse! We're going to become as fat as we looked in the painting!" Lisa explained.

"Well obviously Lisa." Marge replied as both Marge and Lisa started to rapidly gain weight, their clothes grew with them so that they still fitted. Their waists expanded, their limbs thickened, their butts swelled as the weight piled on, Marge's chest became considerably bigger while Lisa's just looked puffy. Soon Marge was a 350lb hefty housewife while no longer little Lisa tipped the scales at around 150lb, not surprisingly they both look rather annoyed. Homer stared at them in shock.

"D'oh!" Homer said.

"Well thanks a lot Homer, since you destroyed that cursed painting I get to be obese, and what about your daughter? Lisa has a hard enough time without having to deal with childhood obesity." Marge said. Homer looked apologetic.

"I'm sorry Marge, I thought destroying the painting would destroy the curse but instead this happened. I'm just a screw up, can you forgive me?" Homer asked. Marge looked at Homer for a moment then she smiled.

"Oh of course I can, come here Homey." Marge said then she waddled forward and hugged Homer which buried his face in her now more than ample bosom. Homer looked a little nervous.

"Well this is going to take some getting used to." Homer said.

"Well don't get to used to it, I intend to drop most of this weight as soon as possible, you too Lisa, being this heavy isn't healthy." Marge replied.

"I guess so mom, but something about this whole situation reminds me of a story I once read. I just can't quite remember which one." Lisa said.

"But how did the painting become cursed in the first place?" Bart asked.

"Well I sorta kinda came home drunk the night your mother painted it and made a wish on it. My bad." Homer explained, Marge and Lisa sighed.

"Well I've put up with a lot in this marriage Homer but the things you do never cease to amaze me. Now lets go back to bed, Bart put out that fire." Marge said.

"Sure thing mom." Bart said then poured a bucket of sand onto the fire to extinguish it. The family headed back upstairs to bed.

The end.

Part 2.

Final Transformation.

The opening scene was the kids from Springfield Elementary waiting in line to get on the school bus outside the school.

"Oh I'm so excited, at last a chance to see some history that isn't yet *another* civil war battlefield." Lisa said to Bart.

"Yeah and because we're not at school we don't have to do any school work." Bart replied, just behind was Ralph Wiggum.

"I'm a lighthouse." Ralph said completely at random. A few moments later Lisa was struck by a premonition that the school bus was going to crash and everyone on board would die. The bus skidded on a mountain road then Otto lost control and the bus plummeted into a ravine where it exploded as it hit the ground.

The scene changed back to Lisa who looked shocked.

"Everyone! Don't get onto the bus! There is going to be a terrible accident! Anyone who gets on that bus is going to die! Don't get on it whatever you do!" Lisa said, Bart and the rest of the kids look upset and surprised at Lisa's assertions.

"Lisa, what in gods name are you talking about?" Bart asked.

"I saw it Bart, I saw the bus crash and we all died, everyone, it exploded after it crashed into a ravine. Don't get on that bus, please don't get on it!" Lisa replied.

Bart realised that Lisa was serious so he grabbed his sisters hand and left the line.

"Come on, lets go." Bart said, some other kids left the line as well, Sherri, Terri, Ralph, Nelson, Jessica and Allison all refused to board the bus because of Lisa's vision. Principle Skinner came out to see what all the fuss is about and Lisa tried to explain to him about her vision but he ignored her. When the kids that left the line wouldn't get on the bus either he gave them detention.

"Oh thanks a lot Lis, now I got detention." Bart said, Lisa was flabbergasted.

"Bart! I just saved your life! If you got on that bus you'd have died! If only the principle had listened to me instead of giving us detention." Lisa replied then the kids that wouldn't get on the bus went to detention and sat down with Mrs Krabapple.

Meanwhile the school bus driven by Otto was climbing up the road alongside Springfield gorge. Ahead of it on the road was a truck driven by Cletus the slack jawed yokel. The truck was in a state of disrepair and was leaking lubricant oil all over the road.

"Cletus, I's told ya we should have got that oil leak problem sorted out afore we left." Cletus wife Brandine said to him.

"Well it's too late now, I guess we'll have to get it checked out when we gets to Ogdenvillie." Cletus replied, as the school bus drove up behind the truck it began slipping and skidding on the oil leaking from it.

"Whoa, who greased the road man?" Otto said, as he tried desperately to control the direction of the bus, he soon lost control of the bus. The children screamed as the bus crashed through the barrier at the roadside and into the ravine where it exploded upon hitting the ground.

"Cletus did you just make that bus crash?" Brandine asked.

"Naww, you know me Brandine I ain't never had an accident, caused dozens but never had one." Cletus responded, Brandine smiled.

"I love you Cletus." Brandine said.

"I love you to sugar pie." Cletus replied.

Later that day Principle Skinner was pacing up and down in his office.

"Hmm, that's odd the school trip should have arrived by now yet still they haven't called me." Skinner said to himself then he called the museum and was shocked to learn that the bus never arrived.

"Oh dear lord, I'd better inform the police." Skinner said to himself then called the police to inform them of the disappearance of the bus. A few hours later Skinner got a call back, he picked up the phone.

"Good lord, that Simpson girl was right, yes, yes I understand, thank you." Skinner put the phone down and headed to Mrs Krabapple's classroom. He opened the door and walked up to Mrs Krabapple's desk where he whispered in her ear about the crash.

"Oh no, that's terrible. Did you call their parents yet?" Mrs Krabapple asked.

"I'm about to, just keep them here a while longer then they'll be picked up." Skinner replied then he then he left the room while Mrs Krabapple stood up and faced the class.

"Children, I'm afraid there has been a terrible accident on the way to our latest museum visit. The school bus crashed on the way out of Springfield and there are no survivors. Please remain calm your parents have been called and will be hear to pick you up soon." Mrs Krabapple explained, the kids started talking amongst themselves apart from Lisa who looks disturbed, Bart leaned over next to her.

"Hey, Lisa, what's wrong? You're not saying "I told you so" like you normally do." Bart said, Lisa just scowled at Bart and said nothing.

The surviving kids were taken home by their parents but then several weeks later strange things started to happen to them. Ralph was playing in the Wiggum back yard chasing insects when he suddenly started to feel weird. He staggered backwards and landed in a part of the garden where pumpkins were growing. He started to turn orange.

"I'm an orange." Ralph said before he started to inflate and swell which caused his clothes to burst and his limbs to be absorbed into his body. Ralph became more and more pumpkin like until he was transformed completely into a pumpkin which took root in the garden.

Elsewhere Nelson Muntz was walking across a farmers field when he suddenly started to get a weird feeling inside.

"Uh, I shouldn't have ate those pinto beans." Nelson said to himself then walked on a few steps until suddenly he stopped dead. His legs and feet began fusing together into a pole while his arms stuck right out at a right angle to his body. His head gradually turned into a pumpkin with a carved face as his body became completely straw and sticks. Nelson was now a scarecrow with only his clothes to give any clue that he was ever human at all.

The next morning Bart and Lisa came down for breakfast, as they took their seats at the kitchen table they noticed that Homer was reading the local paper. The top story in the newspaper was that two children disappeared yesterday and had not been heard from since. Homer looked at his watch, screamed then ran out of the room as the kids picked up the paper and looked at it.

"How odd, that two kids both from our group that didn't go on the bus would disappear like that on the same day." Bart said, Lisa just shuddered

"I'm sure it's nothing Bart." Lisa replied in a voice that suggested she wasn't sure it was nothing.

At Sherri and Terri's house the twins were nearly ready for school when they both suddenly felt weird for no apparent reason. Suddenly they both became stiff and plastic as they shrunk down to Malibu Stacy doll size. Their outfits changed into large pink gowns and their appearance altered so that they looked like doll versions of themselves rather than just small versions of themselves.

"Hi! I'm Malibu Stacy, will you play with me?" They both said because they had become talking dolls.

Elsewhere Jessica Lovejoy was on her way to school, she was passing through the park when she suddenly felt an odd sensation sweep over her.

"Hey, what's going on?" was all Jessica managed to say before she found herself transforming. Jessica swelled and inflated yet at the same time she was gradually being pulled inwards towards her middle as she became rounder and rounder. Soon she was nothing but a pink coloured sphere with her hands, feet and head sticking out. Jessica realised what she was turning into, a toy ball, she was going to be a ball, a child's plaything. Soon enough her transforming body absorbed her hands, feet then finally her head which made her into a coloured rubber ball with stripes the colour of her skin, clothes and hair.

At school later that day Bart, Lisa and Allison were talking in the corridor.

"So no one has seen any sign of Sherri, Terri or Jessica today then?" Lisa asked

"No." Both Allison and Bart replied.

"Well maybe they're upset or scared because of what happened or something." Lisa said, the other two kids looked unconvinced.

The next day the Simpson's kids came down for breakfast again but now they saw the newspaper contained articles about the disappearance of Sherri, Terri and Jessica. Lisa was alarmed, she turned to Bart.

"Bart, don't you see what's happening? Everyone who should have been on that bus is disappearing! Allison and ourselves are next!" Lisa said.

"But what can we do about it even if it is happening like that?" Bart asked, Lisa thought about it for a moment.

"Well what if we actually go to the museum which was our destination that the bus never reached. Maybe that would do something." Lisa said, Bart looked alarmed then pointed to the newspaper again.

"Uh, Lis, I don't quite know how to say this but that museum we were supposed to go to shut down and was bulldozed to make way for a new mega mall. I saw it on the TV last night." Bart explained, Lisa looked scared.

"Oh no! Then we're doomed! There's nothing we can do!" Lisa said, just then the pair of them started to disappear into thin air which caused Marge and Maggie to scream.

At the new mega mall in Ogdenvillie in front of a children's toy shop Bart, Lisa and Allison suddenly appeared out of nowhere. They all looked terrified briefly before they started to transform, they inflated and expanded then they started to float as they become advertising balloons tethered outside the shop. Their faces took on cartoon smiley expressions as they just floated there looking shiny and inflated having completely become balloons now.

The end.

Part 3.

Whateverquest.

The scene opened on the Simpson's front room on what appeared to be a rather slow day. Homer was sitting on the couch eating chips and Bart was sitting around looking bored. Lisa came into the room.

"Shouldn't you at least be doing something other than sitting around?" Lisa asked.

"Shouldn't you be less annoying?" Bart replied, Marge then came in.

"Bart! Don't be mean to your sister. Hmm. If you don't have anything better to do how about we play a game on the internet." Marge said. Bart, Homer and Lisa made interested noises at this point. Bart crossed his fingers.

"Please be counter strike, please be counter strike." Bart said.

"Actually I was talking about Whateverquest, it's an online game where you create a character then go on adventures against monsters and well..more monsters. You get the idea." Marge replied.

"Well that might be fun for a change, it's not like we're exactly swamped with things to do at the moment." Lisa said.

"I'm already logged in, are you guys coming or not?" Bart yelled from upstairs. Homer scratched his head.

"Okay, okay I'll play your game but will someone explain character creation to me, so many choices, so many possibilities, I don't know what to choose!" Homer said, Marge laughed.

"It's okay honey, I'll show you." Marge replied.

So the family got onto their computers then logged in so they could create their characters and join the game. Marge used her elven sorceress character, Lisa created an elven druid character, Bart created a human rouge and Homer chose to be a human warrior after Marge explained the character creation process to him. They all entered the game then they met up and formed a party.

"Okay now what do we do?" Lisa asked.

"We need a quest, let me just see. Hmm. This looks like a good one." Marge replied.

"What is it?" Bart asked.

"It's a quest to recover a forbidden artefact from a necropolis." Marge replied, Bart and Homer both looked disgusted.

"Ewwww." Bart and Homer said, Lisa laughed

"That's necropolis not necrophilia. It means city of the dead." Lisa explained. Bart and Homer looked at each other then have the exact same reaction again. Lisa just sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Never mind. Let's just go. Where is this place anyway?" Lisa said.

"It's beyond the woods of despair the other side of the lake of per.." Marge replied then she noticed everyone else was looking at her impatiently.

"Just follow me okay?" Marge said.

The scene went blank and the words "Over an hour of fragging, slashing, hacking and wandering in circles later..." appeared. Now the Simpson's party had arrived outside the necropolis, an entrance lead down into the underground catacombs.

"Well this is it, get ready, you can expect to be attacked as soon as we enter." Marge said, the group entered the structure but no enemies were present and none appeared.

"Or not. I guess you can never tell." Marge said.

"Well this is riveting. I have walls I could be tagging in real life you know." Bart said.

"Oh Bart, give it a chance, something cool will happen eventually." Marge replied. The group proceeded further into the tunnels, they eventually came to a room which contained several zombies and skeletons. Marge blasted a couple with a fireball, Lisa entangled some of them with her magic then broke them with her staff, Homer hacked some of the zombies to pieces with his sword while Bart initially disappeared then reappeared behind a zombie, he ran it through and killed it. They then celebrate with "Woohoos!" and "YAYS!" Marge folded her arms and looked unimpressed.

"You know it wasn't that good, you only killed a few low powered monsters. Jeeze. Anyway lets keep going, no telling how long this dungeon is." Marge pointed out.

The group moved on to another room which all so had some easy monsters which they quickly defeated, but what they don't expect is the traps hidden in it.

"Who's awesome? We're awesome!" Bart said triumphantly, Marge shook her head.

"Damn n00bs. I think you need to take this a bit more seriously." Marge said, Lisa approached Marge.

"Oh mom, lighten up it's only a ga" Lisa began then there was a audible click as she triggered a trap.

"Uh oh." Marge said then a strange magical explosion covered Marge and Lisa. Homer and Bart were too far away to be hit by it. Suddenly both Marge and Lisa began to bulge, they swelled up then inflated like balloons. Within seconds they were inflated spherically and they rolled around on the floor. Bart just laughed out loud but he stepped back which set off an explosion trap which threw him across the room.

"Totally worth it." Bart said as he flew by.

"Was this game made by perverted male programmers by any chance?" Marge asked.

"Actually this part of the game was made by a woman, I read it in an article about women in male dominated industries." Lisa responded.

"Really? How creative. Well I'm sure it'll wear off soon, status effects normally do." Marge replied, Homer just stood there whistling as he waited for Bart to recover and for Marge and Lisa to return to normal. After some time they did.

"Well let that be a lesson to all of you, be more careful and keep an eye out for traps." Marge said.

After a couple of deserted rooms the party entered a large very dark chamber or possibly a very large dark chamber or even a very large very dark chamber. The darkness made it hard to tell. The darkness however was not the overriding concern as almost as soon as the group entered the room they heard a low loud roar like that of a dragon only more rumbling and grunting than one might expect.

"Uh oh, that sounds like." Marge began.

"UNDEAD DRAGON!" Bart interrupted Marge as he shouted and pointed at it.

"Yeah." Marge said, the beast stamped it's way forward before opening it's mouth wide. Marge anticipated what it was about to do and cast a magic shield spell over the entire party. By the time the dragon used it's breath weapon everyone in the group was protected so the magic multicoloured fire had no effect. Seeing this the beast moved forward to engage them in close combat, Homer and Bart both attacked it directly while Marge and Lisa used various spells to attack it from a distance. The fighting continued and the dragon took a lot of hits but showed no sign of being defeated. In fact it roared defiantly then uses it's great armoured tail as a whip against Homer and Bart which sent them sliding back across the floor of the chamber. Lisa kept slinging spells at the dragon but Marge was distracted.

"Bart! Homer! Are you okay?" Marge asked, just as the dragon starts to prepare another attack with it's breath weapon.

"Mom! Look out!" Lisa said, then Marge turned around and looked at the dragon or rather looked right down it's wide open draconic gob.

"Oh fudge." Marge said, the dragon reared up then unleashed a long burst of magic multicoloured fire that struck Marge and Lisa but not Homer and Bart since they had slid back against the back wall of the chamber. Marge and Lisa both started to inflate, then they floated up from the floor. As Bart and Homer were getting to their feet they noticed what happened and moved forward again to engage the dragon directly. Meanwhile Marge and Lisa were still inflating, bulging and swelling in mid air as they became parade balloon versions of themselves. The fight continued below, eventually Homer and Bart defeated the dragon which fell over dead.

"Phew, that thing was tougher to get rid of than Patty and Selma." Homer said.

"Yeah kinda." Bart replied then looked up and laughed.

"Hey Lis, that's a good look for you!" Bart said sarcastically, Lisa was unable to respond due to her transformation. Soon the blimp status effects wore off Marge and Lisa then the party moved on to the next part of the dungeon.

So the party carried on clearing rooms of monsters and traps until eventually they reached the end of the dungeon. A Lich appeared. Like a boss. Or as a boss really if you think about it.

"Ha ha ha! Very good, you have made it to the forbidden artefact but you shall go no further. Now you shall pay the price for violating my inner sanctum." the Lich said menacingly.

"Gay*cough*gay*cough*" Bart said, Lisa shook her head.

"He's AI Bart, he can't hear you." Lisa replied, Marge whispered something to Homer then the party fanned out in battle formation facing the Lich who began to attack magically, it threw shards of ice at them and called blizzards down on them. Marge and Lisa replied with fireballs and lighting bolts while Bart hid in the shadows where he awaited an opportunity to sneak attack.

Homer meanwhile had outflanked the Lich who was distracted by the rest of the party and he ran into a staircase on the other side of the room. He ran up the stairs right and left as the rest of the party fought the Lich. About halfway up he stopped out of breath.

"Stairs, why'd it have to be stairs? I hate stairs." Homer said then he carried on running until he got to the top where the artefact, which it turned out was a large glowing blue jewel sat on an alter atop a overhanging platform.

On the floor below the rest of the party continued to battle the Lich until Homer grabbed the artefact.

"Gotcha. Hehehehe. A plan with no drawbacks. Now to savour our inevitable victory." Homer said confidently. Suddenly the room started shaking and to Homer and everyone's surprise the overhead platform started to crumble and fell along with the supports which connected it to the wall. Seeing this the rest of the party backed away allowing the platform, the artefact and Homer to fall on the Lich which crushed him. Marge and Bart celebrated while Lisa remained wary.

"Watch out dad, he might still be alive." Lisa warned.

"I don't think so, I already got my XP for him." Homer replied then he picked up the Lich's dead detached skull in his hand.

"Yeah, he's dead alight." Homer mimed with the skull then he threw it away like a piece of garbage. He picked up the artefact which he dropped in the fall and climbed down the pile of debris to join the celebrations.

"So you've finished your first dungeon, do you want to carry on playing for a while?" Marge asked but the rest of the party look unsure.

"Well mom, it's been fun but I really need to work on my homework." Lisa replied.

"I got some taggi..I mean skateboarding I wanna do." Bart said.

"My feet are cold." Homer replied as they all logged out leaving the game, Marge sighed.

"This is the trouble with this game, you can never keep a freaking party together." Marge said to herself.

The end.