The Simpsons THOH 2013 Part 2.

The Simpson's Treehouse of Horror: A trilogy in four parts.

A bunch of Halloween themed stories originally written separately in 2009/2010.

Disclaimer: The Simpson's belong to Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation. This fan fiction is intended as a non profit parody only, no conscious attempt to defame, pass off or claim ownership has been made within this text. All characters within are purely fictional and in no way intended to resemble persons living or dead. No offence is intended to any reader, if offence is caused anyway please feel free to stop reading at any time instead of reading the entire thing then complaining anyway.

Continued from Part 1.

Part three.

Twenty eight d'ohs later.

The scene opened on Mr Burns office at the power plant, the Imperial March from Star Wars played briefly in the background. Mr Burns was looking out of the window when one of the doors opened then closed. Burns turned around and saw his assistant Smithers approaching his desk.

“You wanted to see me sir?” Smithers asked.

“Yes indeed, my contact at the NRC has just informed me that after years of failing to find any fault with my power plant they are resorting to inspecting my mansion. They believe I'm storing radioactive waste illegally in the grounds.” Burns stated.

“Uh, well are you sir?” Smithers asked.

“Well yes, but it's buried so deep that they'll never find it. Actually I'm more concerned about my old germ warfare lab. They'll be hard pressed to miss that.” Burns replied.

“If you don't mind me asking sir why do you have a germ lab in the grounds of your house?” Smithers asked puzzled.

“Well long story short when my official lab got closed down by the liberal government I decided that I'd continue the research off the books. We did come up with something, an airborne zombie virus that makes those infected loose touch with reality. It's still stored in a tank at this lab, I need you to arrange to have it moved to one of the gas tanks here at the power plant.” Burns said.

“Wouldn't it be easier to just neutralise the virus rather than moving it around?” Smithers asked.

“Oh believe me that thought occurred to me as well, unfortunately the research ended rather abruptly so an antidote was never developed. This was decades ago of course, then I got into nuclear power and forgot all about it. The point is if it's moved to the plant then the NRC inspectors won't find it. I would just bribe them but I can't take the chance that they might not be corrupt. After all if the government discovers this virus I could go to jail. Like they should be the only ones to have deadly chemical weapons.” Burns responded.

“I'll make the arrangements at once sir, what do you want me to do about the lab itself?” Smithers asked.

“Oh just have it pulled down, it's of no further use.” Burns replied.

“At once sir.” Smithers nodded then walked out of the office through the door.

“Excellent.” Burns said then sat in his chair and leaned back in it.

The next day at the power plant a tanker was transferring the virus to toxic gas storage tank number five at the power plant. Burns watched it drive away with his assistant Smithers from the window.

“Good work Smithers, now with the lab demolished and the virus out of the way no one at the NRC will ever know about my secret germ warfare program. All we need to do now is arrange “accidents” for the men you hired and we're home dry.” Burns said.

“Actually sir I gave them a cover story so they have no idea what the lab was used for or what was in the tanker. So there really is no need for any assassinations.” Smithers replied.

“Fine, we'll do it your way. I'm sure it'll be less trouble in the long run.” Burns replied then sighed disappointed that he didn't get to have anyone whacked.

“Sir again if you'll permit my curiosity how did the NRC find out about your private lab anyway?” Smithers asked.

“Well apparently some investigative journo type has been sniffing around some rumour started by some idiot. I tell you Smithers it's been the same ever since the nineteen eighties, god forbid any wealthy businessman should be able to do business without his affairs being discussed by the hoy poloy. Anyway apparently he contacted the NRC which is why they're planning an inspection. Unfortunately for them I'm already one step ahead.” Burns explained.

“Very good sir. Will there be anything else?” Smithers asked.

“No no, just attend to your normal duties. I'm sure nothing can go wrong now.” Burns replied. Just then the scene switched to Homer's safety control station at the power plant, Homer was asleep in his chair with his feet rested on the controls. A pressure gauge for toxic storage gas tank five was steadily rising, Homer slept on oblivious as it reached dangerous levels. Some time later there was a dull rumble and a vibration ran through the power plant which woke Homer up.

“Huh? What was that? Did the core melt down? Oh my god! Save me Jeebus!” Homer screamed panicking. Suddenly an alarm sounded.

“Code 33. Code 33. Code 33. External exits have been sealed.” the disembodied voice said.

“Code 33?” Homer asked quizzically then grabbed his procedure manual.

“Lets see, Laser squirrel infestation. No. Mutant Gnome attack. No. Vaguely middle eastern looking person. No. Ah here it is. Gas leak, all personnel put on containment suits.” Homer said then put down the manual, got up, put his suit on then put the helmet on backwards.

“D'oh!” Homer said when he realised what he'd done. Suddenly a voice was heard over the intercom.

“Homer Simpson, report to Mr Burns office immediately.” Smithers announced. Homer straightened his helmet out then groaned.

“Oh. I bet I get blamed for this.” He said then got up and walked out of the doors.

Later Homer arrived in Mr Burns office where Lenny, Carl and Charlie (The guy with the glasses) were lined up in front of Mr Burns desk. Everyone wore containment suits. Burns himself sat at the desk and looked irritated but composed while his assistant stood to the side of him.

“Gentlemen I've called you here on what could well be our only chance to contain this..industrial irregularity.” Burns said then picked up a stick and stepped up to a map on an easel by the desk.

“You will cross the Springfield bridge here to the south of the power plant you will then proceed east until you reach the town hall then turn north. At some point you need to take a sample of the gas cloud then you will proceed north past the court house, Springfield Elementary school and Springfield heights institute of technology. There you will travel west along Springfield heights until you see a side road on the right, take this road to Springfield observatory and deliver the sample to professor Frink. Any questions? No. Good, you may collect your sample container, tazers and mag lights at the front desk. Good day gentlemen.” Burns finished then sat down again.

“Well you heard Mr Burns get to it!” Smithers said. Lenny, Carl, Homer and Charlie all filled out of Mr Burns office and headed for the front desk.

They arrived at the front desk where Homer addressed the security guy who was all so wearing a containment suit.

“Hi, we're here for the suicidally dangerous mission from which return is unlikely.” Homer said. The guard pointed to the pile of tazers, mag lights and an airtight sample box on the floor by the desk. The four men picked a taser and a torch each then Charlie picked up the sample box. They then stepped into a safety door which worked like an airlock.

“Hey you guys, does anyone else have misgivings about this suicidally dangerous mission Burns has sent us on?” Lenny asked while they were in the airlock waiting for the other door to open.

“Nope.” Homer said.

“No.” Carl said.

“No.” Charlie said.

“No me neither.” Lenny said then laughed uncertainly. The door opened and they walked out into the parking lot of the power plant. They didn't loiter, preferring to move quickly away form the building and onto the road down which no traffic was currently passing. After they'd walked some distance they could see the extent of the gas cloud hanging over the river and town on the other side of the bridge which was looming in the distance.

“Oh no! Look at the size of the gas cloud. I wonder if Marge and the kids are okay.” Homer said.

“I know I should say something comforting but I really can't think of anything at this point.” Lenny said as they continued to walk towards the bridge.

“Gee there sure are a lot of abandoned cars. I guess people must have panicked when the leak happened.” Carl observed.

“Too bad we can't drive but that gas cloud is so thick we'd never be able to see to drive in it. Which means more walking. Oh!” Homer whined. They started to cross the bridge picking their way between abandoned cars some of them crashed against the walls of the structure.

“Does anyone else think that cloud is getting bigger?” Charlie asked and pointed at the gas cloud which stretched from the grounds of the power plant across the river then over part of central Springfield.

“Maybe, hard to believe that much gas was in one storage tank even if it was compressed.” Lenny replied.

“Well then finding a sample should be easy.” Homer said unaware that there would be other complications and finding a sample would be the least of their worries. They continued across the bridge in silence then reached the other side where they found themselves standing under the disused monorail tracks built by the town when they were cheated by a conman. All around them the air was thick with a strange dark fog which seemed to block out light allowing a person to see perhaps only a few metres around them, in places much less.

“So lets see, where do we go from here?” Homer asked.

“The city hall. If we can find it.” Carl said then they all switched their torches on which actually did little to improve the situation. They walked barely a block before they started to hear strange noises, grunts and groans in the night, or day, it seemed like night.

“Oh kaaay, I don't like the sound of that.” Homer said. The sound got louder until they saw outlines of figures in the fog.

“Whatever that is it doesn't sound friendly.” Lenny said drawing his stun gun.

“I have a bad feeling about this.” Charlie said adding to global laming. Suddenly everything around them started to blur.

“Oh no! We've crossed the lame barrier! We're going into a flashback!” Homer screamed then the scene dissolved to be replaced by a scene of the gas tank at the Nuclear plant exploding then the gas cloud covered central Springfield. At the androids dungeon Comic book guy was sitting at the register eating chips with dip when suddenly it became dark and the air filled with a strange fog. He coughed then started to rapidly gain hundreds of pounds in weight, broke the stool he's on then fell to the floor.

“Worst pollution ever.” he said before his eyes glazed over like a zombie and he started to groan. He tried to move but was far to enormously fat. The gas continued to move quickly through the centre of the town and turned everyone it came near into fat zombies. Buttons popped, zippers slid down, dresses burst or got pushed up by expanding waistlines. If Springfield was fat before it was fatter now. The gas reached Springfield elementary during morning recess. It descended over the playing field behind the school, the children tried to run but the gas caught them and they became obese zombies groaning and aimlessly waddling around the school yard. Their teachers inside fared no better, bloating up and becoming aimless groaning zombies. Eventually the gas reached the Simpson's house on Evergreen terrace. Marge was hanging washing out in the back yard when it suddenly became dark and foggy.

“What on earth?” Marge said then as she breathed in the gas she ballooned until she was even fatter than Homer while her eyes glazed over. Upstairs Maggie suffered a similar fate as she lay in her crib. The scene pulled out revealing the centre of Springfield more or less completely covered by the zombie gas cloud then it dissolved again back to Homer, Charlie, Lenny and Carl by the monorail.

“Wait a minute, if there's poison fog everywhere then what are people doing walking around in it?” Homer confused. Lenny stepped forward a few paces to get a better look at the figures in the fog then stepped backwards and fell over on his ass.

“Zombies! Fat zombies!” Lenny screamed. Then everyone else screamed including Homer who screamed like a woman. Lenny got to his feet again.

“So now what do we do? Mr Burns didn't say anything about zombies?” Lenny asked.

“I know, we zap them with our stun guns.” Homer suggested.

“Worth a try I guess.” Carl said then they moved forward and zapped the fat zombie townspeople in front of them who fell down twitching.

“Woohoo! Lets go!” Homer said then ran off into the fog.

“Hey, wait up!” Lenny said then they followed him for about a block where they found Homer bending over and hyperventilating.

“Okay maybe walk not run.” Homer said trying to catch his breath. Behind them they heard zombie noises this time coming from Euclid street which they just passed.

“Uh, Homer, I think we'd better go.” Charlie said. Lenny and Carl grabbed Homer and lead him away while Charlie followed with the sample box. Soon they arrived in the south western corner of the town square. The statue of Jebediah Springfield was only visible in outline among the murky semi darkness of the fog.

“We'd better take the sample then get the hell out of here man.” Homer said. Charlie nodded and pressed a button on the sample box which took a sample of the fog which surrounded them.

“Phew, all we have to do now is make it out of a zombie infested town and get this sample to professor Frink. Follow me men!” Homer said then turned around and walked into a lamp post.

“D'oh!” Homer said as he stubbed his toe. They started heading north again past the town hall and the meeting hall. They met no zombie until they reached the intersection with the Springfield hall of records where they saw a crowd of zombies led by a much fatter Patty and Selma. Homer screamed and zapped them. “No way man! No way!” Homer said backing away.

“There's too many of them, lets just get out of here before we get cornered.” Charlie said. The group then set off at a brisk walk with the zombies waddling slowly behind. Eventually they lost them somewhere outside Springfield museum of natural history.

“Homer, what were your wife's sisters doing there?” Carl asked.

“Well the DMV is a block from the town hall so in retrospect it was probably just a coincidence. But you weren't there man! You weren't there!” Homer said sounding crazy.

“Yes I was.” Carl replied.

“Oh yeah. Anyway lets get out of here before more zombies find us.” Homer responded.

“Yeah, we should be in Springfield heights in no time if we keep following Elm street north.” Lenny replied then they set off walking again, after a short while they came to an intersection where Springfield elementary was located. There seemed to be a lot of zombie kids wandering around in this area so they zapped the few that were in the way then made a run for it. They easily out ran the waddling zombie children. Homer thought he saw a kid that looked like Bart in the fog but he couldn't be sure. Soon they reached Springfield heights promenade, again the zombies were everywhere. The group hid behind an abandoned car for some cover.

“So now what? We can't get past all those zombies, they'd swarm us.” Lenny asked.

“Hmm. I don't have a plan or R I?” Homer said idiotically then everyone looked at him.

“Well?” Lenny asked.

“Oh. No. I don't have a plan. Sorry, I got nothing.” Homer replied, everyone else rolled their eyes and groaned.

“Look, we're never going to get to the other side of that crowd of zombies unless we find some way to draw them off. There's just too many of them to stun. What if I got their attention then lead them away so the rest of you could deliver the sample to Frink?” Lenny suggested.

“Oh no. I'm not letting you outta my sight. If your going I'm going. Homer and Charlie can take the sample to the Observatory.” Carl said.

“But what if we run into more zombies?” Homer asked.

“Well there shouldn't be that many outside of the gas cloud, it doesn't reach all the way to the observatory.” Charlie replied.

“Look we have to do this, we might not make it but there's no other way. Come on Lenny. Homer, Charlie, wait for us outside Springfield heights institute of technology, if we're not there in ten minutes then just head for the observatory.” Carl said then Lenny and Carl ran off down a side street, around the block and doubled back on themselves until they stood by the corner of the apartment building opposite the Springfield heights promenade and it's attendant concentration of zombies. They shouted and waved their arms attracting the attention of the zombie group which started to waddle after them. Meanwhile
Homer and Charlie managed to sneak past behind their backs while they were distracted chasing Lenny and Carl. They arrived and waited for Lenny and Carl who soon showed up and they all headed north until they exited the gas cloud. Now it seemed like day time again and there were no zombies in sight.

“Well that's a relief. Maybe we will make it after all.” Lenny said. The rest of the trip to the observatory was uneventful the gas not having spread that far north and therefore there were no zombies.

Finding the road to the observatory proved easy as well since it was signposted at the junction with the main road. After a few more minutes of walking the structure loomed into view.

“Woohoo! We made it!” Homer shouted.

“Yeah, I'm surprised too.” Lenny said.

“Now to deliver the package!” Homer said grabbing the sample box from Charlie who let out a surprised “Hey!”. Homer staggered forward, nearly tripped up on several rocks on the ground, a squirrel, several chickens which took to the air in alarm then fell over backwards and the sample box flew through the air then landed in the enormous postal delivery slot on the side of the observatory building.

“Phew thank god for that oversized mail slot.” Homer said standing up. “Homer! Your head's on fire!” Lenny shouted then pointed at Homer's head inside his suit which was indeed hosting a small fire.

“Oh don't be ridiculous Lenny, if that were true it'd burn up all the air in my suit and I'd pass out.” Homer replied then fell silent made some can't breath noises and passed out. Fortunately starved of oxygen the fire did go out. “Oh boy.” Carl said shaking his head.

“You know in retrospect I don't know why Mr Burns insisted on sending one of the most accident prone of our workers on such a dangerous mission.” Lenny commented as Homer lay unconscious on the ground.

“Homer! Homer wake up! The choppers here to take up back to the plant.” Lenny said standing over Homer who was just regaining consciousness. Homer and the rest of the team were flown home by Mr Burns private helicopter and they soon found themselves in his office once again.

“Well, as we speak professor Frink is searching for an antidote to this chemical and with any luck this mere disaster won't turn in to a catastrophe. Now please accept these distracting hams and employee of the month plaques.” Burns said then Smithers handed out the awards.

“Woohoo!” Homer said receiving his.

“Homer, you're the safety inspector and one of the gas tanks blew up. Doesn't it strike you as odd that your getting an award?” Carl asked as they left the office.

“I unno. Don't ask me how the system works.” Homer shrugged as they walked out. Mr Burns turned to Smithers.

“Well that ought to keep them distracted until my lawyers can draw up some retroactive confidentiality agreements that we'll make them sign on pain of dismissal.” Burns said.

“Your an inspirational leader sir.” Smithers replied.

In any case Frink soon came up with an antidote which was loaded into a rocket and fired over central Springfield to disperse it. Frink's antidote gas neutralised the zombie gas and reversed the zombie effect on the citizens but did nothing to reverse their sudden weight gain. When questioned about it Frink pointed out that if he had a reliable weight loss chemical he wouldn't be an obscure scientist in a two bit town like Springfield. He'd be a Nobel prize winner living in New York or LA. Anyway the town was saved and Mr Burns got away with the accident due to the primary evidence being destroyed and the witnesses being gagged by legal orders. Springfield remains America's fattest city.

Part four.

The Bob that nearly ruined Christmas.

The scene opens on the asteroid belt within the solar system. The view shows various asteroids of different shapes and sizes before it pans around the exterior of one of the larger asteroids then zooms in on a familiar looking flying saucer. The ship belongs to none other than Kang and Kodos the intergalactic space aliens from Rigil seven.

Inside the saucer Kang, Kodos and a couple of other aliens busied themselves operating the ships controls and monitored it's systems.

"Kodos, how long until we are in optimum firing position?" Kang asked.

"Just a few more seconds, it won't be long now." Kodos replied.

"Good, if we complete our mining mission ahead of schedule then the central bureaucracy will be pleased." Kang said. There was a brief silence.

"We are now within range, request permission to begin firing sequence." said Kodos.

"Permission granted. Fire as soon as possible then begin the harvesting procedure." Kang replied. Another alien at the engineering controls pressed a button.

"Charging mining laser." it said.

"Acquiring target, computing firing solution, applying firing solution. Target locked." Kodos said.

"Then what are you waiting for? The earth human holiday of Christmas? FIRE!" Kang shouted then Kodos pressed a button on her control console triggering the mining laser to fire.

Outside the saucer a bright pulse of energy is emitted from one of the ships cannons which impacted on the large asteroid in front of the ship. This caused many smaller pieces of the giant space rock to break off and fly into space. Most of these are tractor beamed aboard the alien spaceship except for one small piece which flew away at an angle then headed off into space. The view follows the asteroid debris as it flies by then in doing so reveals that it is heading towards the earth. Or the earth is heading towards it. It's hard to tell in space.

The scene then fades out with the caption, Several days later, Springfield national forest. There is the sound of sirens and dogs in the air as Sideshow Bob still wearing a prison uniform ran through the forest in his latest attempt to evade the law. Overhead the asteroid fragment had become a meteorite in the earth's atmosphere as it streaked towards the ground nearby. Bob continued to run still pursued by the police with their dogs until he looked up again and noticed how obviously close the object was.

"Oh great, I finally manage to escape from that squalid little hick prison and now I'm about to get a meteorite on the head. Wonderful. Apparently the fates really do have a sense of hum" That was as far as Bob got thinking aloud as the object smashed into the ground a couple of miles away resulting in a violent explosion as well as a flash of light. The impact stunned both Bob and the cops who where following him but Bob was up before they where and continued on his way, obviously the motivation of freedom was strong and Bob had no intention of letting some random event foil his escape. The police with their dogs had recovered and had resumed their pursuit of Bob. If only they had known what was about to happen to their quarry they would have known that the hunter was about to become the hunted.

After a few minutes Bob was drawing close to the crash site where the object had impacted. First there was a slew of devastation, felled trees, small fires then in the centre of an impact crater was a metallic looking rock which still glowed hot from it's passage through the atmosphere and the subsequent impact. Bob surveyed the scene with annoyance, to him this was just another obstacle to be circumvented. Bob ran around the outside of the crater but as he got close to the other side the rock in the crater began to glow with a strange purple energy which lanced out like a lightning bolt then struck Bob who briefly glowed a strange colour before it disappeared. Bob stopped then began to laugh, what was it that had hit him? He only knew it wasn't anything from this planet. Such power, such energy, with this he was sure he would have revenge on those who had accused him, imprisoned him, mocked him. He didn't have to wait long.

"There he is! Freeze! Get on the ground!" a voice yelled, then there was the sound of guns being armed. Bob sneered before levitating over the crater.

"What the hell?" Said one of the police officers.

"I'm sorry gentlemen, but I don't think you'll be taking me in today or anyone else for that matter. Ever." Bob sneered then started to laugh before massing a strange ball of energy in his hands which he then threw at the cops, it split into several smaller balls which each struck an officer. Straight away they began transforming, their feet turned into roots and burrowed into the ground while the rest of their bodies turned into a tree trunk/stem which thickened then grew as branches sprouted from it. Within mere seconds it was over and several plants stood where one there had been several people. The police dogs took one look at this and fled making a whimpering noise. Bob landed in front of the transformed cops.

"Oh my, they're all trees. No one's an Azalea, oh well that's technically a shrub but close enough. Now it's time for me to do something I should have done a long time ago: Take down the clown! Mwhahahahahaha! Tremble Springfield for all who oppose me will surely fall! None can stand before me now!" Bob said then turned around and walked straight into a rake, the handle of which flew up and hit him smack in the face.

"Damnation! What is a rake even doing here in the middle of nowhere? Oh forget it, I have long overdue revenge to take." Bob said to himself as he threw the rake away then walked off again back towards Springfield. As he walked he changed his prison outfit into a trench coat, a hat to cover his distinctive hair and some dark glasses.

Meanwhile at the Simpson's house which was filled with decorations for the Christmas holidays the phone rang and was answered by Marge.

"Hello. Chief Wiggum. Oh no! Yes I'll tell him when he comes home from school. Thank you for letting us know." Marge said then she put the phone down and looked worried but she still went back to cleaning and washing. Some time later Bart and Lisa arrived home, Marge met them at the door. Lisa immediately figured out something was wrong.

"What's wrong mom? You look worried." Lisa asked, Marge knelt down next to Bart then spoke.

"Bart, I'm afraid your arch enemy Sideshow Bob escaped from prison again. So we'll all have to be extra careful until he is recaptured by the police." Marge explained, Bart sighed.

"So I guess this means I can't go out and play with Milhouse then?" Bart asked, Lisa folded her arms contemptuously.

"Well no, at least not until this escaped maniac is caught. I'm sorry Bart but it's for your own good." Marge replied then she stood up then headed back into the kitchen while Bart made a disappointed noise then Lisa spoke.

"Bart, don't you realise your life may be in danger? Please don't sneak out to go play with Milhouse, you'd be such an easy target for Bob. It's about time you started taking personal safety seriously." Lisa said, Bart shot Lisa a glare.

"Yeah well, this better not be for long, I hate being shut up inside. It's like *I'm* grounded because Bob's a criminal." Bart replied, Lisa shrugged.

"Well it's for your own safety but just do what you want. You usually do." Lisa replied, with that Lisa climbed the stairs towards her room, Bart followed her slowly. He wondered if Bob would get to him, after everything that had happened in the past with Bob it did seem pretty likely. This thought was not a comforting one as he walked into his room and put down his school bag.

It turned out Sideshow Bob was not presently concerned with revenge on Bart Simpson as one might have assumed but he was in fact out to get his former boss Krusty. Although Bob certainly wanted revenge on Bart for exposing him as a criminal he craved revenge on Krusty for as he saw it polluting the minds of America's youth with his lowbrow/no brow comedy routines. The very reason that he had turned against Krusty in the first place now drove him against his former master once again. It didn't take long for Bob to find Krusty-Lu studios, it was a large garish place and besides he'd been there many times before. If Bob knew Krusty and he did then he'd be working late although there was scarcely much real work and a lot more drinking/smoking. At any rate Bob hid behind a dumpster until the rest of the staff had gone home for the night then he found an exterior door, turned the lock mechanism into custard and just pushed the door open. Once inside he immediately knew where he was and where Krusty was likely to be. This wouldn't take long Bob thought.

Krusty sat on the sofa in his office pondering the telephone call he had received today. Bob was on the loose again, he wasn't overly worried, if Bob was smart he'd be halfway to capital city or some other state by now. It'd be real dumb to come here and try anything. Nonetheless Bob wasn't known for making rational decisions so Krusty couldn't quite shake his sense of unease even after several large single malt whiskies. That and how a man who hadn't even been a criminal before he'd tried to frame him had managed to escape from jail yet again.

"Who's he think he is, Houdini?" Krusty muttered to himself. Just as he said that Bob who had disguised himself as a rat on the floor behind the sofa turned back into human form and spoke.

"Oh really Kursty, now you should know by now that imposter had nothing on little old me." Bob said, Krusty stood up in shock dropping his drink to the floor where the glass smashed.

"Bob! What kinda trick are you try'in to pull?" Krusty asked, Bob smirked.

"Oh I assure you Krusty it's no trick. Everything I do and am about to do is very real." Bob said then he snapped his fingers and suddenly the pair where outside on the sidewalk in front of the studio. Before Krusty could say or do anything Bob zapped him with a bolt of some strange energy which caused him to immediately transform into a statue complete with a base. A plaque on the base read, Krusty: A hack, a has been and a shill. Bob admired it then shrugged.

"Well I could have had "drunk" but then he wasn't exactly a world class one. Now Barney Gumble, there was an entertaining drunkard. Hmm. That was so easy. Then again I finally have my revenge." Bob said to himself, laughed manically then walked away down the sidewalk.

The next day at the Simpson's house Bart and Homer where watching the morning news. Kent Brockman came on the screen.

"Springfield is in shock today as local TV star Krusty the clown is missing just hours after his arch nemesis Sideshow Bob escaped form the local jail. Police so far have no leads. More on that later, now a popular brand of toaster carries a deadly wiring fault, we'll tell you which one right after this commercial break." Kent Brockman announced on the TV, Bart was shocked.

"Oh no, Bob must have got Krusty. This can't be a coincidence, it can't." Bart said.

"Well it *could* be." Homer replied, Bart glared at Homer briefly.

"What? It *could* be a coinkydink." Homer stated again.

"Yeah, thanks dad, that's real helpful." Bart said, just then Lisa came in from the hallway, Bart got off the couch and approached her.

"Lisa, Krusty is missing, I bet Bob got to him." Bart explained.

"Oh no, that's terrible, but it might not be Bob, I mean Krusty's been in showbuisness a long time, he might have other enemies." Lisa speculated, Bart shook his head.

"No Lisa, it's Bob, it's gotta be, you have to help me catch him like we did before. It's the only way." Bart replied, Marge overhead and came out from the kitchen looking annoyed.

"Oh no, you two are going to school. No crazy adventures, crazy schemes or detective work. Just go to school, come home and do your homework. Got it?" Marge demanded.

"Yes mom." Bart and Lisa both replied without enthusiasm.

Later that day Homer came back early from work at the power plant. Marge met him at the front door as he closed it.

"Homer, what are you doing here?" Marge asked.

"Well I know you're worried since Bob hasn't been caught yet and Krusty is missing so I ducked out early to talk to chief Wiggum about getting some police protection." Homer responded.

"Well what did he say?" Marge enquired.

"Weeelll. He kinda said no." Homer replied.

"What does "kinda" no mean?" Marge asked frowning.

"Well he asked for a big bribe. I tried the mob but they're up to here with a gang war at the moment so we're on our own." Homer stated then there was a brief pause.

"So you're telling me that Bob is still on the loose and the police are worse than useless, well I should have guessed after all the corruption I saw when I was on the force. Homer we have to do something, if we stay here then Bart's a sitting duck. It's just a matter of time before Bob comes for him." Marge said.

"Well yeah but what are you going to do, Bart's had a good run." Homer responded, Marge looked surprised then annoyed.

"Homer! He's ten years old!" Marge replied, Homer stared into space for a moment.

"Oh right. I was thinking of dogs. Sorry. So..um what do you think we should do?" Homer asked.

"Well how about we go hide out at the Springfield retirement castle? No wait, that won't work, there's not enough room. I know, we could hide out at that abandoned farm your family used to own. I'll start packing our things." Marge said then headed upstairs to start packing, Homer shrugged then went into the kitchen to get a beer.

Later both the Simpson's cars loaded up with Simpson's, luggage and pets pulled out of the driveway then drove off down Evergreen Terrace. Some time later after dark Bob pulled up in a stolen unmarked police car he'd taken from the police who where perusing him in the woods. Bob got out.

"Finally I shall have my revenge against that spiky haired little hellion." Bob said then made his way towards the front door.

"Huh, seems awfully quite. Well their probably hiding in the basement or something." Bob said then he turned himself into some kind of gas then entered the house through the mail slot before he assumed a human form once again then he took out a knife and ran his finger along the blade.

"Now the time of my revenge is at hand!" Bob said then ran around the ground floor of the house, nothing, Bob then checked the basement, the garage and the upstairs to no avail. Bob plodded down the stair case looking dejected.

"Curses! They knew I was coming, but where did they go? Hmm." Bob said then repeated his gas trick to exit the house then walked back to his car where he drove off then picked up some radio chatter on his stolen police scanner.

"Does anyone have any idea where Sideshow Bob is? Word is the Simpson's are so scared they've abandoned their house and are hiding out at the old Simpson farm." a cop on the radio said, Bob smiled. They were just making this too easy.

"Ah ha! I should have know that little rat and his family wouldn't bolt very far. That would be to much like a smart move. Old Simpson farm here I come." Bob said to himself then depressed the accelerator causing the car to speed up somewhat. Bob's car raced towards the edge of Springfield and it wouldn't be long before the Simpson's received an unwelcome visitor.

Bob's car pulled up at the front gate of the farm. Bob got out then tried to walk towards the house only to step on a series of rakes. After about a dozen or so he managed to get through them and headed towards the house. Suddenly Marge and Homer both came out of the houses front door wielding shotguns. Bob just stopped, laughed then turned their guns into rattlesnakes which they both quickly threw away. They tried to run away but Bob zapped Marge instantly turning her into a tractor which then suddenly fell on Homer trapping him underneath her. Bob wasted no time and moved into the house but a quick look around the rooms showed there was nobody on the ground floor. Bob then looked out one of the rear windows where he saw Bart and Lisa running away across the field.

"Oh you can run, but you can't hide." Bob said then bolted out of the back door after them. Since the two kids both ran in different directions Bob decided to chase Lisa first since he didn't want her interfering with his revenge on Bart. Bob eventually caught up with Lisa in some tall grass when she tripped on a rock and fell over. As Lisa got to her feet a familiar shadow loomed over her, she wanted to scream but all she did was whimper. Bob sneered.

"Well well well, if it isn't meddlesome little Lisa Simpson. I'm afraid I'm going to punish you now for helping your meddling brother put me behind bars repeatedly. Then I shall deal with your brother." Bob boasted then he threw a ball of energy at Lisa which hit her and triggered a transformation. Her legs stuck together as her feed burrowed into the ground, her arms shot out at right angles while her limbs became wooded. Her body became straw while her head turned into a pumpkin, soon she was a scarecrow with only her red dress and necklace to give any clue to her true identity. Bob then turned around and spotted Bart running away across the field in the other direction. Bob turned himself into a rocket then fired himself so that he landed in front of Bart. Bob then turned back to human form and advanced on Bart.

"Aaaah! This is like a nightmare or Nightmare on Elm Street!" Bart said, Bob laughed.

"Oh no Bart, I'm afraid there'll be no screaming and waking up for you! Only revenge for me!" Bob replied maliciously then hurled an energy orb at Bart which struck him. At first nothing happened but suddenly Bart started to feel extremely bloated then he noticed his hands had turned orange along with the rest of his body. The change sped up as Bart's body ballooned outwards which ripped his clothes, absorbed his limbs and left him wiggling his hands and feet in frustration. Bart soon found himself sitting with a large pumpkin body no hands, feet or limbs but his head which had turned green was part of the pumpkins stem.

"Well Bart my old nemesis it seems like it's time to carve the pumpkin!" gloated Bob then he pulled out a knife but suddenly stopped.

"Wait, is that too obvious? Never mind, if anyone asks I'll make up something better and lie! Hahahaha!" Bob said to himself then he advanced on the helpless Bart but is suddenly hit by a tranquilliser dart fired from behind him. Bob pulls it out.

"What? Do you really think one dart can stop me?" Bob asked then he was hit by three more darts in quick succession.

"Well, that'll do it." Bob admitted then fell to the ground face first. Bob's body glowed then the strange energy that had entered him at the crash site suddenly left his body and flew off into the sky. Bart and everyone else Bob transformed suddenly changed back to normal. Bart looked around to see who had fired the knock out darts and noticed Maggie at an upstairs window of the farm house with a dart gun. Just then Lisa came running up.

"Bart! You're okay! What happened? Bob turned me into a scarecrow but I got better!" Lisa said.

"No time to explain, quick lets go get some rope and tie Bob up before he wakes up." Bart suggested.

"Good idea. Lets go." Lisa replied then the two of them ran towards the house.

The end.