Amy's Heart Broken Prayer

Amy’s Heart Broken Prayer

          Grandma Rose was lying in her bed, feeling every beat of her heart, although they were weak and slow she could still feel them. Thank you, Jesus.
         Amy slipped into her grandmother's room and sat down in the old rocker, the room redolent of roses, like her grandma, so comforting. Amy was convinced that grandma was asleep, but her heart was just bursting with fear and so much love she couldn't stop herself from talking to her “Grandma, I love you so much. I don't know what a heart attack is exactly, but they tell me that you had one. I hope that you are the winner and not the devil that attacked you. You have so much love in your heart, maybe it was too full, and some had to escape so your heart wouldn't burst? No, you have repeatedly said that one could never have too much love. There’s always room for more. You also said that God was in your heart, and He never strayed, but maybe He took a nap when you were attacked. Please God, come back and heal grandma's heart, please just for me. I can't imagine my life without her in it.”
         “Honey child, don't you worry about me. I am just fine. God is still in my heart. I expect to stay here for a long time yet. It breaks my heart hearing you cry and yet, my heart is bursting with pride hearing your beautiful prayer. I love you Amy, you are just like your mommy; compassionate and loving.” “Oh grandma, I didn't mean to wake you! I am sorry. Mommy will be so upset with me. Please go back to sleep and get strong so that we can bake some of your famous chocolate chip cookies.” Amy gently kissed her grandma on the forehead and tip-toed out of the room quickly.
         “Oh, I wish she didn't run away like that, I enjoy talking to that child so much. It seems strange to me, being in this bed. You know, I never thought much about my heart as an organ or the mechanical pump that it is. I always just thought of my heart being the center of me and the most hidden place, a spot for all my love, pain, fears, feelings and beliefs to live, right next to Jesus. It's funny how life stops one in the middle of plans and dreams and changes how one thinks. Sure, I always knew peoples’ hearts just wore out, and then you went home to live with Jesus. I just didn't expect it to happen to ME! Not yet, anyway.” Grandma thought to herself, it seemed she was just too weak for her words to come out, but her mind was strong and active. “Over the years I had felt my heart break in half, from a lost love and then burst with joy when I found my soul mate. My heart felt so full and happy when Amy's mommy was born. Amelia was a lovely child and is a fantastic mother. So many feelings to cram into one small spot, yet they all fit. My faith in Jesus carried me through; He promised not to give me more than I could endure. However, growing can be a painful experience. ”
         “The day that my father and mother died in a train accident I felt fear so great that I didn't think that I could stand it. Then I remembered reading in the Holy Book, there was a time for everything, a time for new life and a time for death. I know that it was their time, but that doesn't lessen my loss or pain, except that I know they are in a better place. It is true that time soothes the sharpness of big hurts, oh they don't leave they are just a little less painful .My heart swelled with pride, and sometimes with anger. How does that happen, how can I feel love and anger at the same time? I don't know, guess I never will.”
          ”You know hearts are funny things, I have felt down hearted and sad, and yet ken that my heart was right. My heart had been in my throat when I was scared out of my mind, and then I have felt such warmth and love. I often said my heart's desire was to be a God-loving woman, a good wife to my husband and mother to my children. My heart's desire was always to be the peacemaker and to never, never hurt another person with a stray word, thought or action. Yet, now my heart is weak, not pumping well they say. My family is downstairs talking in hushed voices, full of concern, love and fear. My little Amy is worried. God, please, give me the strength to get up out of this bed and continue with my life; please make my heart pump strongly. However, if not, let me have the courage and fortitude to accept what is. God, please give my family uplifted hearts, joy and peace whatever the outcome. Thank You Lord. “
         Time passed slowly that year; autumn was time for sickness and bed rest, winter was time for healing, and I celebrated Christmas for its true meaning, not for presents, company and meals. That was a lovely thing; I read my Bible and got close to Jesus again. Spring brought new growth and renewed strength. I was able to do more and more things on my own. My family went back to caring for their families and left me alone more often. As time passed I got strong and my energy came back. “Praise the Lord.” Amy visited me as often as possible, and still maintained her excellent grades and perfect attendance record. When school lets out for the summer break, Amy will come to stay with me. One thing for sure, Grandma, Amy and Jesus, were a formidable team. Later that summer Amy and Grandma Rose were outside sipping iced tea on the charming front porch, laughing while waiting for the last batch of chocolate chip cookies out of the oven.
          Amy got real serious and said “Grandma I am glad that you won and that Jesus chased away that old heart attack devil. I enjoy spending my summers here with you, right here on this porch. I love you sooooo much.”
          “Yes, you have said it all darling. I give praise to the Lord! Now let's go in and check those cookies. “As they walked into the kitchen Grandma said another silent prayer of thanksgiving to her Lord and Savior.