Suicide Note

Suicide note
For the first time in a long time I went to sleep
and hoped I would never wake up again.
  I can't bring myself to do it,  no knife, no gun ,
Nor noose could I bring myself to grab--But
  Its a sunny day outside it feels -- good
  I died in the spring time sun.
I ascended to her face we talked had --fun
  But I wont be back until her life fades.
  I wont be back until the moon runs to take her place
He threw back he rejected me .
  He deemed me to dim to play along with the stars in heaven.
He deemed me to human to weak too lost
  But ill fall slowly--gently as a feather
Slowly until I hit the lush green grass
  Or the posh rough ground with its chilly demeanor.
  Death does feel so bad its rather calming-- To me at least
Still I'm not sure if any of this makes sense--I'm not sure if i want it to die yet
  But ill lay there quiet with a chilling heat airing from me.
  Until the zephyrs take me away .
Until they drop me once again.
  Leaving star dust on the world--Until she comes back
  Until she rises again-- I'll leave this Suicide note....