The Adventures of Slinky

There was once a slinky all red, green and yellow
Sitting in the toy shop of a rather feeble fellow.

One winter's night as the clock struck four,
A window shatter, scattering glass on the floor.

A gang of robbers who were not very nice
Entered the store, as quiet as mice.

They looted and pillaged and emptied the shelves
Until their sacks were akin to those of Santa's elves.

The slinky was squashed between a Barbie and her Ken
And shoved aside as sunder'd hearts united again.

The precipitous push sent the slinky through a tear
And it landed on the road in headlights' glare.

The slinky compressed and sprang out of the way
Into a grassy meadow with bales of hay.

Along came a gnome, chest puffed up with pride
Thinking the slinky would be a place for his little piece on the side.

His love nest was found by his wife's private detective
And he lost all he had to a divorce court's directive.

The abandoned slinky was found by a cow
And rested on the bovine horn while it chewed on its' chow.

The cow was high-reaching; it dreamt of jumping over the moon
And when it practiced that night the slinky fell into a swoon.

It landed in quicksand and was swiftly sucked in
The poor red and yellow slinky was never heard of again.