The Olive Theory

A/N: Short oneshot made for comedy purposes. Dedicated to the How I Met Your Mother 'Pilot'.Now, I present to you...



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The Olive Theory



She hates olives. He doesn't. He was relieved actually. Sure, it was just a theory. The perfect match is when one likes olives and the other doesn't. It was stupid the more you thought about it, but Clark was a clueless person when it came to Lois.



Their first date, their real first date, was just a walk around the park. He wasn't wearing anything special except for the dorky glasses that Lois requested for him in the first place. She thought he looked handsome in his blazer, tie, and jeans. He thought she looked beautiful, although she was only wearing a sweater and jeans. She didn't fix up her hair or anything like that. In fact, she was just the ordinary Lois Lane. And Clark wasn't complaining.

Their date was about one week after he started working at the Daily Planet. He had mustered the courage to actually say something to her. Clark didn't suggest anywhere for the first date, just a walk in the park. He hardly knew much about her, other than she was tough as nails and didn't take crap from anyone. So he bombarded her with questions.



He found out the little things at first. Her favorite color is green 'like grass', her favorite food is different varieties of Japanese food, 'it makes me feel less weird about myself. Different colors, different flavors, so you just take it all in one bite'. She is thirty-eight. He didn't directly ask her how old she was, he mentioned that he was thirty-three and she brought it up as a warning. She said she has 'old lady pains'. Clark had to reassure her that he didn't think any less of her. And it was true. He didn't.



He also found out a lot about her family. Her father was a retired General who now settled in Peoria, Illinois. Her sister Lucy, was a 'pain in her neck', went to Medical School, and was now a heart doctor in California.

Lois went silent for a little bit when Clark asked about her mother. He didn't ask her more than once, quickly telling her she didn't have to answer.



"My mom?" Lois stammered. Her arm locked in Clark's merely tightened. She bit her lip and looked around, the night sky was only getting darker, and there was no one except them. She sighed. If she wanted to build something here, she might as well tell him now.



"She...died. I have pictures of together, when I was young. But I don't remember her. She's basically a stranger to me." She noticed Clark had stopped walking completely. Her head flipped to the side to meet Clark's sorrow filled eyes.



"Lois, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" Clark began.



"Don't be sorry. It was a long time ago, Clark." Lois assured him that he was okay at his position. He could ask her anything. She trusted him.



They continued walking, trying to light up the mood. And then Lois wondered if he was hungry as her.



"Wanna grab a bite to eat?" She asked. Clark smiled.



"Sure. Wherever you want." He replied.



They didn't go anywhere special. Clark felt embarrassed because he didn't have much cash on him, so they just went to the closest one, an Italian restaurant.



"I'm gonna warn you now, I'm a sucker for spaghetti. Not just that, but it tends to get messy." Lois said, their arms were still intertwined so she slowly unwrapped her elbow from Clark's broad bicep.



"I'm sure I can handle it, Lois." Clark said as they entered the restaurant together.

Lois tried her best to not make a mess with her spaghetti and meatballs, but it turns out Clark was trying to be just as careful. He ate his olives before he dug into the spaghetti. Lois shoved them to the side of her plate.



After she finished all of her food, she passed the plate over to Clark, telling him,



"You want these? I hate olives."

A cute smile had crept up on Clark's face. He accepted them with a laugh.



"What's so funny?"



"The Olive Theory. The Olive Theory is when two people on a date, find out that one person likes olives and the other doesn't. It's what makes them such a great couple." Clark explained, tossing an olive into his mouth. Lois smiled and pressed her hands together.



"You know, Clark, I have a jar of olives that have been sitting in my fridge forever." She said.



"I can take em' off your hands." Clark said, grinning wildly. Lois was total perfection in his eyes. And he wasn't afraid to admit that he has feelings for her. He didn't know if those feelings were brought out when they were at the cemetery, when they were in the military base, when they were waiting for the Kryptonians to arrive, that breath of relief he took when she reached for his hand was still wandering in his memory and Clark didn't mind. After he saved her from getting sucked up into the Phantom Zone, he just took that fresh breath of relief again. She's here. She's not gone. You have her.



So he kissed her, in the middle of all that rubble.  And he didn't regret it because she didn't push him away. So now, asking her for her olives was just another way of telling her thank you. Thank you, for accepting me.

Lois smiled as she took his hand from across the table. She never took her eyes off of him, assuring him that she'll always accept him whether he likes olives or not.



"They're all yours."