Friendly Advice in a Bar

Friendly Advice in a Bar

Michael Lancing sat at the bar in Jacob’s Den nursing a beer. He was waiting for the owner, Jacob Wind to join him for a drink. Mike and Jacob had been friends since they had started teaching at the University of South Florida. He was a professor of psychology, and Jacob was a business professor. They both shared very open nontraditional views of sexuality and relationships. Mike was a proponent of free-love, and Jacob was a proponent of BDSM.

Recently, Mike had met a grad student named Jillian whom he found himself becoming very attached to. He had been in a committed relationship a year before she met Jillian, and his partner tried to change certain aspects of his life that he did not want changed. She coerced him into giving up his extracurricular activities with his students, and demanded he participate in a monogamous relationship with her. Jillian was not asking for monogamy, but she wanted him to demonstrate some sort of commitment to her. He was not sure he could do that without giving up his lifestyle. He hoped that Jacob could help him figure out how to keep Jillian in his life without giving up his free-love lifestyle.

Jacob emerged from the back of his bar, which was a BDSM club, and took the stool beside Mike. The bar tender, anticipating his boss’s desire, placed a full mug of beer in front of Jacob. The two men sipped their beers in silence for a few moments.

“Great party last night,” Jacob finally broke the silence.

“Thank you,” Mike sipped his beer.

“I noticed you weren’t really participating in the fun,” Jacob studied Mike’s profile. He was definitely tense and mulling over a decision. “What’s going on with you?”

“I’m in love with Jill,” Mike admitted, “and it scares the hell out of me.”

“Why?” Jacob asked.

“Because I was in love with Laura too,” Mike looked up at his friend. “I don’t want to fall into a possessive relationship again.”

“And yet you fucked Laura,” Jacob shook his head. “Jill is not Laura. She hasn’t asked you to give up your parties, or sex with other women.”

“No,” Mike nodded in agreement, “but she doesn’t like me to be with other women when she’s not there to see it.”

“Can you blame her after…?” Jacob began.

“I get that I screwed up with Laura!” Mike snapped, “but Jill was uncomfortable with the idea of me doing things with other women before what happened with Laura.”

“Sorry Mike,” Jacob sipped his beer, “but yes you did screw up royally when you screw Laura. Jill was warming up to polyamory, but this little incident of, what I would consider infidelity will cause a set back.”

“I promised her I wouldn’t do that again,” Mike asserted.

“Talk is cheap,” Jacob asserted. “You are going to have to work to earn her trust back, and she is going to have to work to earn yours.”

“Mine?” Mike inquired.

“She nearly jumped into bed with Aaron,” Jacob reminded him. “You can’t tell me that doesn’t piss you off just a bit. You both have some things to work through. Perhaps you should consider couples’ counseling.”

“It does piss me off,” Mike admitted, “but not at her.”

“At yourself?” Jacob inquired.

“Yes,” Mike sipped his beer, and noticed it was empty. He signaled to the bar tender for another.

“You can be pissed at her for that too,” Jacob offered. “No matter what you did she is responsible for her actions.”

“I know,” said Mike. “So, what should I do?”

“Jill’s coming home tonight right?” Jacob inquired. “You need to be there when she gets back to your place. You kiss her, you hug her, and then you take her back to your bed, and love her until neither of you have anything left.”

Mike nodded and finished the second beer that had been set in front of him. Jacob grabbed his arm when he reached for his wallet.

“It’s on the house,” he said. “Go home and remind Jill of how much you love her.”

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