Venting

Tell me you love me. That looking into my eyes give you butterflies. Tell me when I kiss your lips your knees forget their own existence. Tell me when I hold you in my arms your heart syncs with mine. Tell me you are mine. That I am the only one on your mind, that this world is ours. Tell me that you care. Tell me you miss me. Tell me that I meant something to you. That you hate to see me and I not speak to you. Tell me you miss our conversations and our secret hangouts. Tell me you miss our forbidden love. Tell me I am better than she is. Tell me I wasnât perfect. Tell me I was perfect for you.  Tell me that the scars that covers my soul now did not come in vain. Tell me that you fell for me to. Tell me that all of this is true. Tell me... tell me something⦠anything. I miss you. I know love because of you. I know myself because of you. I know hurt because of you. I know pain because of you. I know anger because of you. I know what wolves feel like once a month when they look up towards the moon and cry for a love they can never have only difference is I feel like this on a daily basis. Because of you. I know you. I know I love you. I love everything about you. I love the way you wrinkle your nose when you blush, the way you bite the left side of your lip when youâre in deep thought. I love the wrinkles in your forehead that you get when youâre reading a really good book. I love your passion for learning and the way your eyes light up when you take about education. I love the way you use to stand on your tippy toes when you hugged me around my neck even though you are taller than me. I love the way you giggled when you did that⦠it was the little things. It was a little thing that made you say no to my love. My love, tell me⦠tell me I meant something to you. Tell me that these scars did not come in vain. There is a fire in my veins when I look at you. There is a hole in my chest that use to be where you resided. My smile is vacant. There is no you in my life so there is no smile on my face. No peace because all I feel is rage. Why couldnât you love me the way I loved you. I thought the world of you. Wouldâve fought the world for you. Stood out in the cold for you. Now Iâm feeling cold because of you. Love donât live here anymore. You were the one for me I was sure. I was wrong. Everyone said that you would hurt me because you were never over E, they were right. I shouldâve left. When I had the chance. Letâs be friends. Thatâs what we said. We thought it was working until tears was shed. On my end they were at least. You didnât care. I never meant a damn thing to you. All these scars came in vain. The fire in my veins are consuming me. I miss you. I hate you. I love you. I resent you. One shot, two shot, four. Waiting on you to come to my door. Keep finding you at the bottom of this glass. 4 shot, 8 shot, 10. Till I never see you again. Passed out wake up looking for my phone. Thinking maybe youâve texted or youâve called. Nothing. Like always. Tell me you cared. You canât because you never did. They told me you would hurt me. My heart said you wouldnât. My mind said you would. Head. Heart. What a foolish thing it is.