I wake up and my husband is not in bed. I roll over and look at the alarm clock, its 3:00. I decide to walk downstairs and see what he is doing. As I’m walking down the stairs I hear him talking to someone. Who the hell can he be talking to at 3 in the morning? I get close to enough to make out the words he is saying.
“Yeah I’m married. Does that matter?” he mumbled. I can feel my body begin to heat up the closer and closer I get to him. My mind is going wild. He’s cheating on me. He’s up talking to some bitch and 3 in the morning instead of lying in bed with me.
“Who the hell are you talking to at 3 in the morning?” I yell.
“It’s Jake from State Farm,” he replies.
I snatch the phone.
“So what are you wearing Jake from State Farm?” she question.
To my surprise a man’s voice answers, “Uhhh, Khakis.”
I’m so embarrassed at this point I reply, “She sounds hideous,” and go back to bed.
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