This is Love

            He had held her at her birth, when he was an awkward boy of 13. She was the tiniest, pinkest little creature he had ever seen, and he had been slightly frightened by this new piece of his world. He had been old enough to know that life as he knew it was going to change and not entirely sure he liked that fact.

            Yet mixed in to the unpleasant feelings was a surge of what he barely recognized as love; a protective, warm, dazzled feeling that became stronger the longer he held this snuggling little human. She had gripped his hand in her much smaller one and cuddled closer to his warmth, and he had been hooked. In that moment, he had become a big brother.

            Time had passed. She grew as he did, but that initial surge of protectiveness and warmth had only gotten stronger. They had the ability to fight like the best of them, but their fierce loyalty prevented either of them from allowing anyone else to say a mean word. She had never stopped snuggling close, and he had never stopped letting her, no matter how uncool it might have been. By the time she was 13 herself they weren't just siblings, they were friends.

            He watched over her from a far now, for he had married and had a family of his own, but watch over her he did. He rejoiced with her in her triumphs and consoled her when she faced disappointments. He was her confidant and adviser through many scrapes and mistakes, and he was contentedly proud of the person she was becoming.

            Yet one day, when she as a freshly turned 16, he began to notice a change. She didn't call as much, at all. When he called her she was quiet, distracted. He grew less and less aware of her daily experiences and felt more and more distant from the girl he had cared for and watched over for so much his life. He wasn't aware of it, but he hurt at this change, and expressed this feeling in annoyance. Their conversations that had once flowed so effortlessly began to feel more like prying interrogations that left him with less knowledge and more pain than ever. Slowly he too stopped calling, preferring not to encounter this strange wall that her youth was causing her to build.

            In a visit to his parents a few months later he had finally discovered the cause of this new awkwardness, and it had knocked the wind out of him. In the short conversation she'd had, she had let slip a name, Kayden. Kayden. A boy. That was all he knew, and yet it was more than enough to put a chill in his heart. Kayden. To him the name was dark, sinister, and the youth behind the name was instantly held accountable for all the changes in his sweet, innocent young sister. His sister who, he was certain, was much too young to be mentioning the name of any boy, much less this fool Kayden!

            It began to torment him, the wondering and the worry. He had been a young man himself not so long ago that he'd forgotten the thoughts he'd had toward girls his own age. Without even realizing he was following a pattern as old as families themselves, he began fighting against everything she was feeling toward this boy, fighting against everything about her that was different. He was around now, around to point out that she shouldn't wear so much makeup, that he missed her short hair, that her clothes left too little to the imagination, that heels and dresses were meant for a woman, not a girl. He was around to make sure she knew he disliked this Kayden, whom he did not know, and to point out repeatedly her own lack of experience.

    Such warnings were given in love, but the way he gave them was painful. They made her feel small, insecure. They made her question her worth, her right to be loved.  He was unaware of how his comments hurt, but hurt they did. She was as confused and uncertain of these new feelings as he was, and she wanted so badly to have her calm, caring big brother back to talk to about her worries, her fears.

            For this Kayden had started doing some of the things that her brother had so callously predicted he would, and she was surprised and frightened. She had been so sure that she and he had the same ideas of what love meant, so confident that he too would want time before becoming physical, that want mattered more was having someone to talk to about anything. Yet lately, all he wanted to talk about was kidding, touching... sex. She know that sex was reserved for love, but Kayden said that was how she would know she loved him, if she let him have that piece of her. She didn't want to do that, she knew she wasn't ready, but she didn't know how to turn him down without having him walk away from her completely. She wanted her big brother to snuggle her again and tell her what to do, but she was also angry with him and wanted to prove him wrong about everything, including how love works.

            There is a dangerous time in every girls life when her choices will define how she comes to see herself in adulthood. A time that will instill in her either pride in her own strength or bring her a set of regrets that will last her a lifetime. A time when wise counsel may or may not be heeded, entirely based on the emotions of the moment, and when anger at another can be a stronger motivator than her own internal values. A time when well chosen words will save her, and thoughtless words will doom her. She had reached that dangerous time. She was living in that kind of uncertainty, desperate for advice she very well might choose not to heed.

          In times of trial, it is said, one will go back to what one knows, what is habit, and in this fact was her salvation, for her closeness with her brother had not been completely erased by the past months of bitterness. At the turning point she chose to try once more to talk to him, and as clueless as he could be, he recognized that she was at a crossroads. Immediately, the confusion and fear and anger evaporated, leaving behind only the urge to protect and the calm certainty that this indeed was still his little sister. He spoke and she listened, then she spoke in turn, and they both finally understood that there are some bonds in this life that nothing breaks, some feelings that will never change, and some people who will never leave you behind, never give up on you, no matter how much you may deserve to be cut free. Love like that really exists, and that is the true love of a lifetime.

          I will not tell you what she decided in this instance. I will not tell you what he said. There are times when specifics only cloud the real issue, and all you need know is that this love, their love, survived this change, this trial and this test of its endurance. Like all that is tested and proven worthy, their faith and reliance on this love grew stronger, and they came away with the peace that comes from the certainty that there is someone out there who cares for you enough to be honest. These tests will come again for them, for life is change, but the pattern has never been broken, and this love, their love, is strong enough to withstand what will come their way.

          So you may in good conscience leave their story here, in their hands, and merely take a lesson from what you heard today. Fiction teaches as well as fact, and I am not going to tell you if these people exist in the world you are from. I am only going to advise that learning from others may be argued to be the epitome of wisdom, and leave you with a question: Will you be wise?