The ups and downs beyond the light at the end of the tunnel. |
It's January! Happy new year! So this year was going okay until 3 weeks into January. It was a Sunday so i was getting ready to go to work, then a massive argument broke out between me, my dad and stepmom. It got to the point where i didnt feel comfortable being there with them so i got up and ran for the door. Tried to leave. The door was locked. Dad came over and we were arguing some more. Until he mentioned my mom. I get defensive over her and who would't? She bought me into this world and i am thankful. Obviously dad doesn't like her very much, due to her living in Ireland, but that's no excuse for what he did. Nothing had scared me so much in my life more than those few moments. I sat on the stairs screaming at him. Begging him not to hurt me. But that didn't stop him. I went to work as per usual and put on the fake smile i once displayed on a regular occasion. I told HIM what happened; HE got scared for my sake. Scared that i'd get hit again. HE told my mom and they both agreed that they didn't want me living there anymore. Again, this didn't change anything. I went home from work despite telling Matt what happened. For a few days after that i was cautious and hesitant around Dad. He hardly spoke to me or even looked at me. He avoided talking to me at all costs. After this it's back to normal. As if it never happened. But it did. I know it did. HE knows it did. The self inflicted scars show it did. Regardless of what happened, everyone seemed to pretend as if it didn't, but my dad and stepmom became much more...approachable. They left me to myself and i continued my life happily, although HE begged me to leave as he could see the misery and pain they were causing me. HE said i could go live with him, but i didn't want to leave. I couldn't leave my siblings alone in that house where they can't fend for themselves. So i stay. A few weeks later and it's February 3rd, mine and His anniversary. For once i'm not scared. I'm ecstatic at the fact my happiness has lasted the year. Ups and downs may have occurred but in the end i'm still a winner. Life reminds me of snakes and ladders. You can't expect to win without the ups and downs |